MAD on the bailout: Smells Like Greed Spirit

Here's a sneak peak at MAD Magazine's upcoming artwork on the bailout! Greed Spirit JPEG (Thanks, Austin!)


  1. The note below is starting to make the internet rounds. Seems like a much better idea than the shock doctrine being being forced on us. – AK

    Hi Pals,

    I’m against the
    $85,000,000,000.00 bailout of AIG.

    Instead, I’m in favor of giving
    $85,000,000,000 to America in a We Deserve It

    To make the math simple, let’s assume there are
    200,000,000 bonafide U.S. Citizens 18+.

    population is about 301,000,000 +/- counting every man, woman and child.
    So 200,000,000 might be a fair stab at adults 18 and up..

    So divide
    200 million adults 18+ into $85 billion that equals $425,000.00.

    plan is to give $425,000 to every person 18+ as a We Deserve It

    Of course, it would NOT be tax free.

    So let’s
    assume a tax rate of 30%.

    Every individual 18+ has to pay
    $127,500.00 in taxes.

    That sends $25,500,000,000 right back to
    Uncle Sam.

    But it means that every adult 18+ has $297,500.00 in
    their pocket.

    A husband and wife has $595,000.00.

    What would
    you do with $297,500.00 to $595,000.00 in your family?

    Pay off your
    mortgage – housing crisis solved.

    Repay college loans – what a
    great boost to new grads

    Put away money for college – it’ll be

    Save in a bank – create money to loan to

    Buy a new car – create jobs

    Invest in the
    market – capital drives growth

    Pay for your parent’s medical
    insurance – health care improves

    Enable Deadbeat Dads to come clean
    – or else

    Remember this is for every adult U S Citizen 18+
    including the folks who lost their jobs at Lehman Brothers and every other
    company that is cutting back. And of course, for those serving in our
    Armed Forces.

    If we’re going to re-distribute wealth let’s really
    do it…instead of trickling out a puny $1000.00 ( ‘vote buy’ ) economic
    incentive that is being proposed
    by one of our candidates for

    If we’re going to do an $85 billion bailout, let’s
    bail out every adult U S Citizen 18+!

    As for AIG – liquidate

    Sell off its parts.

    Let American General go back to
    being American General.

    Sell off the real estate.

    Let the
    private sector bargain hunters cut it up and clean it up.

    Here’s my
    rationale. We deserve it and AIG doesn’t.

    Sure it’s a crazy idea
    that can ‘never work.’

    But can you imagine the Coast-To-Coast Block

    How do you spell Economic Boom?

    I trust my fellow
    adult Americans to know how to use the $85 Billion

    We Deserve It
    Dividend more than I do the geniuses at AIG or in Washington DC

    And remember, The Birk plan
    only really costs $59.5 Billion because $25.5 Billion is returned
    instantly in taxes to Uncle Sam.

    Ahhh…I feel so much better
    getting that off my chest.

    Kindest personal


    T. J. Birkenmeier, A Creative Guy &
    Citizen of the Republic

    PS: Feel free to pass this along to your
    pals as it’s either good for a laugh or a tear or a very sobering thought
    on how to best use $85 Billion!!
    Unfortunately, we know how the scum in govt actually does things.

  2. Hmm, What would I do with $297.50?

    Put it towards food just like everyone did with that stimulus check. Sure glad that stimulated the economy.

  3. Don’t worry about about it, the american colonies are pretty damn receptive, we’ll try and pay for the raw and unbridled capitalism, but at the same time try and pay for the debt, “that I owe personally”, for being a dickhead country!!

  4. ((with apologies to Nirvana & fans:))

    Heed the lobbyists, they’re our friends
    Here’s a bailout you won’t comprehend
    You’ll surely lose and pretend
    everything’s fine, until you’re sacked
    Have you got your bindle packed?

    Now go, oh no, hell, oh how low


    Greed community is dangerous
    Here we are now, in their big mess
    Pray stupidity’s not contagious


  5. We can’t afford to fix this

    Go to

    to find contact information for the senators in your state. Search for your senator by name or state by clicking on the arrow from either dropdown menu. Contact information is provided here.

    Listen Up People, This is Important
    Our country is in crisis. We have been living on credit from the top to the bottom. The companies we have been doing business with did not plan their budgets on their actual cash on hand but on their purposed income from doing business with you and the interest you would pay them.

    If you have a history of bad credit and skipping out on debt, no problem, they’ll just charge you a higher interest rate. The problem is, they were blinded by greed and wanted their bottom line to look good. They began to feed on themselves. They took on more and more and more bad debt. We are now stuck in the cesspool of their conniving, scheming trap of credit.

    The same as we don’t have enough to pay them back, they don’t have enough to pay anyone else back. I think we should all stop paying our bills, pull our money out of the banking systems and just pretend that everything in life is normal.

    Do you remember a few years back Bush was pushing to privatize social security and let Wall Street have at it?

    Do you remember just about a year ago when Bush was insistent that the economy was stable?

    Do you remember lying to your parents when you had smoked pot drank beer or had sex and pretended that you would never do such a thing?

    Come on people! Wake up! This is a crisis which is only going to get worse.

    Look around you, join a cause, list your stuff on or do something to let the government know you’re out here, you’re watching and you’re not going to sit back and just watch them destroy our country.

    If you’re in the mood, organize a rally with help from these people Or just figure out something you can do to let it be known you are not going to take the “everything’s fine” attitude of the government anymore!

    I always told my children when they were young, If you hold a single stick in your hand and you bend it hard enough, it will snap in half. If you hold two, three, four, five, etc. It gets harder and harder to break. There is strength in numbers, the larger the number, the more strength.

    Anyone who knows me knows I am not one to jump on the band wagon. I don’t go with the flow and I have my own way of doing things. At this point and time though, dam straight, I’m driving the bus to the steps of the White House and yelling the loudest when the door opens! Let’s move people, let’s move!

  6. I wish people would not think of this as a “bailout” because it’s not. Think of it as “keep my job and not be in a breadline plan.”

    The treasury *will be paid back*. So much as the fat cat morons that got us here, they are *few* in number and there are millions of “us.” We really can’t afford to cut off our nose to spite our face here. This really is Great Depression 2.0, not a “bailout.”

    Please research out what is happening in the credit markets and why credit is so very important before you whine about a “bailout.”

  7. T. J. Birkenmeier, A Creative Guy &
    Citizen of the Republic

    Clearly Birkenmeier is a bit of a berk. Probably one of those that caused the problem with math skills like that.

  8. I watched days of cspan waiting for one single person to refer to the American people as citizens/the people/our people/americans/etc. but they only called us taxpayers…?

    So thats it huh, congress sits on its ass for years on most topics but when the very companies that pull the strings of the congress have a problem, boy they get on the damn ball! Even working weekends!

    Then they spend days calling us taxpayers, because folks, thats all we are to them, not good people, not hard working citizens, not the american people, but simply payers of tax.

    Ill never forget it, Bush was just getting into office and I decided to look up bush videos. One of the first ones I found was a video of him slightly drunk at a wedding. In that video he not only makes fun of the bride and groom but also the american people. The guy holding the camera says, so what do you think about the american people. And he (in a smart assed way) says I love the taxpayers, they are good little taxpayers and he laughs. I already didnt like the guy but after further research I really didnt like the guy. But the one thing I took away from that video was how good hard working men and woman of america are whittled down to just being payers of tax. Well I for one think we should all NOT PAY TAXES. Lets see if they can come up with another name for America’s citizens….

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