Quack back massager from 1930

To think that the humble anal bead began life as a quack 1930s back massager! From the Aug, 1930 ish of Physical Culture (which magazine, I'm reliably assured by Ben "Bad Science" Goldacre is a kind of ground zero for quack medical adverts.

NU-VIM (Aug, 1930)

I write books. My latest is a YA science fiction novel called Homeland (it's the sequel to Little Brother). More books: Rapture of the Nerds (a novel, with Charlie Stross); With a Little Help (short stories); and The Great Big Beautiful Tomorrow (novella and nonfic). I speak all over the place and I tweet and tumble, too.

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rasz

My mom used one this very morning while waiting for eggs to boil :)
I dont like it, she loves it.
AirPillo

I’ve used a back massager like that before. It was made of wood.

It didn’t exactly feel more than a little bit pleasant.
IamInnocent

Loneliness has a long history…
arkizzle

“Certainly better for you than sticking a string of beads up your ass.”

[citation needed]

:)
reginald

#1

Have you tried?
zuzu

“Hey, no lawnmower!”
jso

Alert me when someone invents the VIM (http://www.vim.org/) annihilator!

EMACS 4 EVER!
http://www.gnu.org/software/emacs/
Crunchbird

Indeed, I call shenanigans on both the usage of the term “quack” (it is and does exactly what it claims) and the suggestion that this particular massager has any relationship to anal beads other than a rough similarity of form.
arkizzle

Rasz.. *sigh* I can’t even bring my self to make the appropiate joke..

Anyone want to jump in on this?
Kevin Kenny

Because of the Comstock Act, these things couldn’t be labeled as what they were. You see a lot of ads from the period touting vibrators as neck massagers or complexion aids – check out the picture of the Ash Flash at http://www.vibratormuseum.com/battery/index.html – the instruction guide, with the picture of the lady doing her face with her vibrator, is now a hilarious period piece.
Toast

This reminds me:

Why are they selling vibrators in the Vermont Country Store catalog?

http://tinyurl.com/cuoh9m

It’s as if Paul Harvey were doing a commercial for a gay bath house.
Toast

Well, that link didn’t work, so I’ll try again:

http://www.vermontcountrystore.com/browse/Home/Apothecary/Intimate-Solutions/Massager/D/30100/P/1:100:1000:10120/I/f11493?evar3=BROWSE
robulus

@Toast

That must be one hell of a vibrator. They recommend purchasing a walking cane with it.
Snig

A lot of this milieu was wacky and quacky, but they also recommended:
Exercise
Fruit and veggies
Whole Grains
Smoking Cessation
Decades before the medical establishment realized the benefits.
I am not touting the benefits of the device in question, but parts of the physical culture movement was actually ahead of its time.
prunk

@6
Ever read Choke by Chuck?
UncommonSense

To a perv, everything seems like something else.
trr

Sometimes a back massager is just a back massager.
Anonymous

Anal beads are at least hundreds of years old. It is mentioned in the historical novel Shogun, which is set in 1600 or so.
Halloween Jack

Holy crap, the Vermont Country Store has Grecian Formula for pubic hair! Oh, Internet, you’re still a cornucopia of delights.
Uncle Geo

My friend Bob McCoy created the Museum of Questionable Medical Devices, perhaps the largest collections of these things anywhere. Since Bob’s retirement the collection now resides at the Science Museum of Minnesota. He has a website at:

http://www.museumofquackery.com/

One of my favorites is the “Stimulator” or “Crystaldyne Pain Reliever”:

“The Stimulator is essentially an electric gas barbecue grill igniter outfitted with finger grips. When pressed against the skin, the devices sparks and causes a small electric shock. Makers of the device claim it can relieve headaches, back pain, arthritis, stress, menstrual cramps, earaches, sinus, nosebleeds, flu and other ailments. ”

And you’ll have to go there for info on the “Timely Warning”: “PREVENTS NIGHT EMISSIONS BY AROUSING THE WEARER”

Many are marvels of wood, glass and metal -a Steampunkers delight!
Uncle_Max

I just drove past that address in Philly this weekend. I wasn’t specifically looking for the Nu-Vim Appliance Co., but I’m fairly certain it’s no longer located there.

The bottom must have fallen out of the Exhilarator market.
chris

@JSO

You can ctrl-meta-alt-triplebackwardsbucky-s t f u emacs-lover!
This shows that vim is the superior technology…
it can even massage your back!
Kaden

You guys are more familiar with the form factor of anal beads rather than their scale and actual use, right?
Anonymous

C’mon Cory, this is classic (circa 1980) ad copy, like the Consumer’s Distributing ‘Personal Massager’ for ‘deep muscle stimulation’

In short, this is a sneaky but legal way to advertise their real use!
buddy66

I don’t know how ”quack” this is; could have some relaxing and toning value. Certainly better for you than sticking a string of beads up your ass.