Mark Frauenfelder at 1:33 pm Sat, Aug 29, 2009
ADVERTISE AT BOING BOING!
"And now, a dramatic reading of a real break up letter from a real person."
Dramatic reading of a break-up letter (via Sean Bonner)
I nominate Morgan Freeman. Too bad Vincent Price isn’t around as he would be PERFECT!
It’s a terrible reading. It’s embarrassing. The girl writes better than the mook reads.
Anonymous@16: “I nominate Morgan Freeman. Too bad Vincent Price isn’t around as he would be PERFECT!”
I nominate Brian Blessed.
Gee , my break up letter said “Even my dog would
not wish to be seen walking with you”.
Now that hurts.
youtube version for whoever doesnt want to install quicktime.
oh hey boingboing, maybe you’d like a video of dancing hamsters, a cartoon that sings “badger badger”, and/or a techno remix of engrish from the old game “Zero Wing”
I know she’s angry, but why is she taking it out on the beautiful English language?? Punctuation is your BFF.
~JES5199, perhaps you shouldn’t read the goodness that is boingboing then….
just….ow. As a writer, I can’t even read something this poorly written. My brain can’t process it. Anyone have a translator handy? Perhaps some spare punctuation?
Perhaps the young man is not missing much after all. If I’d had a son who got a letter like this, I’d threaten him with disinheritance if he married someone this idiotic. Of course, I’d have tried to raise my son with some taste…
@21 – I lol’d, hard.
@#27: I fear for the current generation, for their tolerance, even celebration, of increasingly pathetic scholastic standards.
An inability to employ the written word effectively does not become an adult. Whoever composed this epically inane drivel is clearly an idiot, and deserves to be pilloried as an example to warn others to get their heads around their native language.
As for public humiliation, at least these days it’s mostly inflicted on enthusiastic volunteers (think Big Brother vs being locked in stocks)…
Oh fooie, it seems to require Quicktime to play the audio, and for some reason QuickAlternative won’t do it.
Oh, and #21 Jes5199, I think you meant to say dancing hampsters, if I remember correctly.
You know, that’s pretty creepy. Remembering that the hamster dance was originally misspelled will make me an internet old timer one day: “Oh grandpa, no one wants to hear your dusty old stories about the early days of the ‘internet’!”
This might be old, but I don’t think I’ve seen it. Is there a version somewhere that uses a friendlier process to deliver the audio?
Sweet mouldy cheese and day old chicken farts!
Is “old” the new “first”?!
Go opera on its ass, and sing it out loud!
I fear for the current generation because we seem to think it’s fine to humiliate someone because of spelling and grammar. Hey look, she’s had her emotional outburst put up for public ridicule, that’s actually pretty horrible but who cares? Look at the spelling and lack of punctuation, LOLZ!!!1!
I think the nitpicking of grammar gets out of hand on the internetz. It’s becoming an easy way to put down someone’s opinion without actually addressing the content of what they said.
The author of that letter, however, deserves a certain amount of ridicule. If you want to write a letter to burn an ex who mistreated you, at least give it a proofread! That letter is pretty much incoherent. If you’re old enough to have a boyfriend, then you’re old enough to avoid things like: “and after we were over you an idiot dared you even tried …”
And we can’t forget that the dramatic reading is full-on lulz.
#26: its pretty much anonymous. We’re not mocking the author specifically, sicne we don’t know who she is. That removes the malicious aspect of it.
But yeah. Any native English speaker above, say, 12 or so who writes like that deserves some mockery.
damn, “chris” missed out on a smart one ;)
The reader reminds me of “Roy” in “The IT Crowd”. Great.
Dude sounds like he’s about to crack up while reading several times.
Other funny voices to read the SRS in, historically, have been (1) Comic Book Guy from Simpsons, (2) Mike Tyson, (3) Michael Jackson, and (4) a combo of 2+3.
Raw emotion tends to get in the way of tidy prose.
But, earlier suggestions of different narrations may lead to crowdsourced readings of such break-up letters…
That was absolutely beautiful. And saddening.
I fear for the next generation.
Looking at it initially, I was unamused, and expected very little to be added by reading it out loud. I was wrong. It’s absolutely ridiculous to listen to. I was laughing by the third line. Who comes up with that? Really?
I was hoping this would be like Duplex Planet where casual words are raised to the level of poetry. Unfortunately, it’s just a mock-Shakesperian mock-reading. I still think that a truly dramatic reading of this letter would be great. Are there any actors out there who could really put some soul into it?
Are there any actors out there who could really put some soul into it?
Is that code for Shatner?
Here’s a charming video presentation of e-mails from a young lady who reviles her boyfriend repeatedly for not returning her messages, because she forgot to remember that he’s in Europe for two weeks.
My brain exploded somewhere near the middle of that five line sentence. Well done!
Someone is pouring her heart out — is that really the right time to ask her to go back and check her spelling? Wouldn’t that take all the beautiful overwrought emotion out of the thing?
ASIFA-Hollywood Animation Archive: I wonder if John K would be up for it?
This is older than dirt! Ok…its about 4-5 years old by my estimation but it just gets better as it ages. Some fellas at my office heard it for the first time a few months back…ah internet nostalgia.
Wow, I forgot all about this! I first saw it a couple years ago, and it’s just as funny now as it was then!
I’m pretty much required by law to recommend “How is Babby Formed?”
Well, bummer, I guess the French artist Sophie Calle wasn’t the first to do this. On the other hand, she got more mileage, er, kilometerage, out of hers.
Beautiful Could NOT stop laughing.
Another YTMND classic.
Not only do I agree with #8-9 that this is old, I’m reasonably certain I saw this originally because of a BB post several years ago. Couldn’t find it with a cursory search, but I do think BB covered this when it first came out.
Robin Williams, as John Houseman reads the phone book (SCTV):,
I sent this to a friend of mine and he wrote back:
“I had just clicked on Kraftwerk’s RADIO-ACTIVITY in my iTUNES, then clicked your link, not expecting audio. It’s even more dramatic when read to the opening of ‘RadioaktivitÃ¤t’. I started thinking ‘I don’t remember a spoken narrative on this album.'”
Don’t idiots know how to use spellcheck?
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