Guestblogger Paul Spinrad is a freelance writer/editor with Catholic interests, and is Projects Editor for MAKE magazine. He is the author of The VJ Book and The Re/Search Guide to Bodily Fluids, and was an early contributor to bOING bOING when it was an online zine. He lives in San Francisco.
If it's true that British Naval history is written in rum, sodomy, and the lash, one can't help but imagine what colorful fates have befallen drunken sailors early in the morning. Like many folk songs, "What Shall We Do With A Drunken Sailor," is a great template for verbal improvisation. For each verse, you just need four counts of lyrics, which you repeat between choruses. This provides ample time to set down your mug and gesture to your buddies, "Hey-- I've got a good one!" so they will give you the floor next time around.
I wish we could all be together now, singing sea chanties in some friendly tavern. That's not possible, but I think we can still have some fun coming up with and sharing new verses for What Shall We Do With A Drunken Sailor. I'll start, and if you have any, please post them in the comments:
• Ream his bunghole with a rusty scupper (repeat)
• Wring his sack in the starboard windlass (repeat)
• Soak his cheeks in the Devil's bath, now (repeat)
• Coat his mizzen-mast with tar and feathers (repeat)
(Obligatory Distancing Comment: Yes, this is totally immature.)
Tanner Stokes of Herp Derp fame has done it again. He invented what we have all longed for, since the internet began: an effective way to shut people up. “Plasma ball destroys the web.” Yes, friends, Tanner’s latest creation is the answer to unfriendly YouTube comments, harassing or abusive Facebook posts, douchey viral ads, you […]
These delightful images were created to celebrate an annual food and culture festival in Brazil.
Fenwick writes, “I had the tremendous opportunity to have a public talk with William Gibson when my university asked if I’d would to do a public talk with a public figure. I had no idea I’d be so lucky as to talk with William Gibson when I agreed. I thought you might be a kick […]
You’ve heard the news: cyber security is the new and very scary frontier. Hackers are out there just waiting for you to relax for a second and let them in. But that’s not going to happen to you. With a lifetime premium subscription to ZenMate VPN, you’re completely protected from anyone out there who wants […]
Remember back to the time when people thought java was just a hip way to talk about coffee? Or you vaguely remembered from geography class that it’s an island in the South Pacific? We’ve come a long way since then and now that we’ve rocket blasted into the tech future, you’re going to need to […]
Plastic is so 2013. You don’t want to buy something only to throw it away or lose it and barely care. You like nice things and want to hang onto them. The Plazmatic lighter here is a high quality, high tech alternative to the typical cheap, plastic lighter you get at the old gas station. […]