The superintendent at a housing complex in suburban New York will go to prison for 6.5 years for "entering a tenant's apartment and having sex with a Labrador retriever." (NY Post)

50 Responses to “Housing superintendent gets 6 years for sex with tenant's dog”

  1. mr_bloo_sky says:

    And yet, no top executives of major Wall Street banks in jail, and no jail time for any of the Bush Administration for war crimes.

  2. codedreamer says:

    They are cute though…

  3. Velocirapt42 says:

    If somebody raped my dog, I would want to hit them with a very large rock repeatedly, in the face, in addition to the prison sentence.

  4. Preston Sturges says:

    “In college he studied animal husbandry – until he got caught.”
    -W.C. Fields

    • Boundegar says:

      Tom Lehrer, actually. 

      And I’d like to know just why we all assume this wasn’t a private act between consenting adults.  Would this story read differently if it was “daughter” instead of “dog?”

  5. Preston Sturges says:

    Definitely an animal lover.

  6. Preston Sturges says:

    I heard his girlfriend was a real dog.

  7. Jack Holmes says:

    Bringing new meaning to the term “poon hound.”

  8. teapot says:

    This guy got “a total effective sentence of six years suspended after 15 months to serve and four years probation” for raping a woman. 15 months for raping a woman, 6 years for raping a dog & 30+ years for opening a closet and writing a clever script.

    That’s a totally awesome legal system you guys have built for yourselves there!

    • otterhead says:

      Apples to oranges. Forcing sex isn’t the same in every case.

      • Boris Bartlog says:

         It’s still true that his sentence seems steep in comparison to that typically meted out to rapists. Obviously the fact that he invaded the apartment in order to commit the crime is exacerbating and it sounds like he had done this multiple times, but still. You could shoot someone’s dog and burglarize their place (separately) and end up with a much lesser penalty than this.

        • otterhead says:

          This case is being treated like a sex offender incident — forcing sex onto someone who can’t consent. It’s sort of unprecedented, so I can’t say whether it’s too steep or not steep enough. I know personally that if I found out that my super was breaking into my house and raping my dog, I’d want them put away for quite some time. And since the dog can’t speak to their feelings on the matter, as a sexually violated woman can, perhaps they’re erring on the side of caution.

          • wysinwyg says:

            Still doesn’t seem quite right that the guy would probably have gotten a lighter sentence for raping the tenant rather than the dog.

          • otterhead says:

            Let’s not start inventing laws and pretending to be lawyers. Crimes like this are sentenced on a case-by-case basis at a judge’s jurisdiction and there’s many, many factors that determine a sentence. You do NOT know what the outcome would be if this was a human rather than a dog. It may have been a far, far worse sentence.

      • Snig says:

        No, but I think the first rapist mentioned should have received significantly more punishment, certainly more than a dog rapist.  I like dogs, but value humans more. 

  9. Preston Sturges says:

    The poodle bites, the poodle chews it. 

  10. social_maladroit says:

    In other news, a dog recently gave birth after having sex with a honeydew.

    When asked what he would name it, the dog’s astonished owner said, “I haven’t decided yet. For now, I’m just calling it ‘my melon-collie baby’.

  11. If you need me I’ll be in the lab.

  12. gwailo_joe says:

    A well deserved sentence: why do some people feel entitled to take what isn’t theirs?  It’s a violation of propriety and property rights.

    Anyone has sex with my dog, it’s gonna be me…

  13. John Barber says:

    Is “entering a tenant’s apartment” a euphemism for something worse than having sex with a labrador?

  14. senorglory says:

    Michael Vick got 23 months.

  15.  That joke is infinitely sad.

  16. tiredofit says:

    I guess Rick Santorum was right … legalizing marriage for gays led to this.

  17. Halloween_Jack says:

    But you fuck one dog…

  18. Donald Martin says:

    What is that in dog years?

  19. While I am howling at the puns, I feel obligated to point out that the story says that he “enter[ed] a tenant’s apartment” in order to do this.

    Assuming that the entering was done without the tenant’s permission (otherwise we would have an even more interesting story) this was most likely what got him the time since it is breaking and entering and, since it was done with the intent to commit a further crime inside, may be some form of felony trespass, depending on the jurisdiction.

    So, please don’t go around saying “some guy got over 6 years for screwing a dog” as you will be increasing the level of BS and half-truths present in our society the same way Fox News does.

    • jackbird says:

      Also, being the building super, he was probably entrusted with a master key, so there’s a further breach of trust aspect than a random B&E.

  20. SomeGuyNamedMark says:

    Xeni, please move the baby panda story to the spot after this one.  I need a panda chaser now.  Thanks.

  21. nomad411 says:

    Doggie Style 2.0?

  22. Preston Sturges says:

    I thought that I had fallen in love with you
    But it was only puppy love (Only puppy love)
    Only puppy love (Only puppy love)
    Puppy love (Puppy love)
    I thought that my love for you was really true
    But it was only puppy love (Only puppy love)
    Only puppy love (Only puppy love)

    -Barbara Lewis, Puppy Love

    • Antinous / Moderator says:

      I must take a trip to California
      And leave my poor sweetheart alone
      If he has a dog, he won’t be lonesome
      And the doggie will have a good home

      How much is that doggie in the window?
      The one with the waggly tail
      How much is that doggie in the window?
      I do hope that doggie’s for sale

  23. felsby says:

    I think the US law has some *edit this out*

  24. kiptw says:

    The dog was totally asking for it! It gave him a fetching look!

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