Peanuts by Charles Bukowski

If Peanuts had been written by Charles Bukowski, not Charles Schulz,

It began as a mistake.

The first time that Charles Branaski met Lucy Van Pelt, she was holding a football. He didn't care for the game, baseball was his thing. Still, she held out that old football.

"Just kick the fucking thing," she said.

"Listen, babe. You just hold that thing steady and I'll kick the shit out of it."

She threw her head back and laughed. She laughed long and hard and propped up the football. Charlie took a running start and he reared back his leg and kicked as hard as he could. Lucy was laughing too hard to hold the ball steady and it slipped out of her hand. Charlie missed the ball and flew straight up in the air and landed flat on his back.

Link WARNING: I received an email that this site has malware on it. A reader says: "The third page of this made made my browser window scrunch up into a little box and popped open a dialog box trying to get me to do something by scaring me about all the "adult sites" on my computer." Click at your own risk.

(Thanks, HIROHITO99!)

Reader comment:

Sarang says:

I noticed the warning you posted in response to a reader's concern. The malware he mentions is an impolite ad for "DriveCleaner" and I've seen it before. I normally use Safari on a Mac, and the first time I experienced it, I was shocked that it manages to manipulate windows and navigation on it. Presumably even nastier stuff happens on Windows/IE.

Even more surprising was that this kept happening while visiting, which I considered to be a reputable site. It turned out that the DriveCleaner malware was served through a banner ad service, and seemed to be targeted to non-US IP addresses — it started happening immediately after I moved from San Francisco to France! To wunderground's credit, they were extremely responsive to my complaint and took care of the issue promptly. They confirmed that only European visitors were being served the ad.

I suspect this is common practice — American Web site operators wouldn't see these malicious ads themselves, and would have no idea until foreign visitors started complaining…

Rob says:

I'm on Verizon in North Carolina and that malware/ad pounded me pretty
hard. It might not be everywhere, but it's not limited to non-US.