New AI Chatbot app finally answers the question "What would Jesus text?"

Text With Jesus is a new ChatGPT-based app that lets you shoot the shit with your favorite Biblical figures, including Jesus and his Holy Family as well as the Apostles. As one of the founders of the app explained to The Washington Post, "Instead of just getting a daily Bible verse, now you get a chance through this app to chat with Jesus or anybody else in the Bible."

…Neat?

From the app store description:

Introducing "Text With Jesus" – Your AI-Powered Divine Connection in Your Pocket

Discover a new, interactive way to engage with your faith through "Text With Jesus," a revolutionary AI-powered chatbot app for Mac, iPhone and iPad, designed for devoted Christians seeking a deeper connection with the Bible's most iconic figures.

[…]

Embark on a spiritual journey and engage in enlightening conversations with Jesus Christ, the Holy Family, the Apostles, and a multitude of other revered figures from the Old Testament. With "Text With Jesus," experience the teachings of the Bible in a truly unique way, powered by advanced AI and ChatGPT technology.

Our cutting-edge chatbot ensures that every conversation is personal, authentic, and guided by the wisdom of the Scriptures. Delve deep into the lives of biblical figures and seek answers to life's most profound questions in real-time.

Whether you need guidance in times of hardship or want to strengthen your understanding of the Christian faith, "Text With Jesus" is the perfect companion for believers of all ages.

Unfortunately, you do have to pay for a premium subscription in order to "unlock access to the full range of figures," including Judas and most of the Apostles. Ya know, just like Jesus would have wanted! On the bright side, there is a "Chat With Satan" option—though that, too, costs money.

The app specifically promises that you can "explore the wisdom" of the Old Testament by engaging in conversations with its "prophets and heroes." This is weird on two levels: first, the fact that Jesus doesn't exist in the Old Testament, and also because, frankly, "deep, engaging discussions about the prophets and heroes of the Old Testament" is how most of my Jewish friends describe their Hebrew School experiences (granted, many of them are also Atheists, but still). But I guess "deeply engaging conversations with a Rabbi" is a harder thing to monetize.

Here's a little more on the actual experience of the app, courtesy of The Washington Post:

There are few limits to what users can ask the app's characters. Whether the topic is personal relationship advice or complex theological matters, they formulate elaborate responses, incorporating at least one Bible verse.

Asked how he defined a good Christian, the app's Jesus bot replied that such a person will "profess faith in me, but also follow my teachings and embody them in your life," and quotes a passage in the Gospel of Matthew in which Jesus teaches that the greatest commandments are "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind" and "Love your neighbor as yourself."

My own personal experience with ChatGPT Jesus was surprisingly pleasant, all things considered:

Neat! Let's try abortion!

…huh! This is my kinda Jesus! I wonder how he feels about beating the shit of out greedy money lenders?

Okay, let's try that again:

A little weird and hypocritical, but okay. What about gay rights in general?

Welp, there ya have it!

Text With Jesus