Pulped! A blender battle on the edge of the Oort Cloud

The Asteroid Smoothie Shack was the only smoothie shop on the tiny planetoid NX-42789. Business was slow out here on the frozen edge of the solar system. Some days only a handful of customers stopped by, miners and traders mostly, looking for a cold treat to break up the monotony.

Owner Jax Tanner did his best with the old beat-up blender he'd inherited when he took over the shop. But it was on its last legs, sputtering and spraying chunks of fruit all over. He needed a serious upgrade if he was going to keep the Shack open.

When he saw an ad for the Cuisinart SmartPower Deluxe, Jax knew it was the answer. This hardcore blender could crush anything he threw at it. No more limp, half-blended shakes. The patented stainless-steel blade and powerful motor would pulverize fruits and ice into the perfect consistency.

Jax ordered one right away, maxing out his credit to pay the insane shipping cost all the way out here. This baby was an investment in his future. The day it arrived, he eagerly ripped open the box, reveling in the heft of the die-cast base. He tossed in a bushel of asteroid sourced berries and hit puree. A flawless vortex of juice and fruit swirled within the borosilicate glass. It was poetry in motion.

For a month, business boomed. The asteroid miners couldn't get enough of Jax's silky smooth new shakes. But then…disaster struck. Bandits hijacked the supply shuttle bound for NX-42789. All incoming food shipments were cut off, leaving Jax's shelves bare. He rationed what few ingredients remained, but when the last spaceship banana got sucked into the blender, he knew the end had come.

The Cuisinart had been a lifesaver, but it couldn't conjure food out of thin space. As Jax flipped the sign to closed, he gazed longingly at the idle machine. Perhaps one day fresh fruit would return, so it could whirl and swirl once more. But for now, the Smoothie Shack was truly shaken…out of business.

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