Ever wondered what a Puritan would think of Harold, er, Harry Potter? Atun-Shei's Witchfinder General series will let you know just what these god-fearing types would have to say on a myriad of topics. In full period garb and speech, you can see exactly how this man of god would misinterpret this story from the Wizarding World, not as a child's tale of discovery and ~~~magic~~~, but as a morality play, warning youths to stay on the righteous path of a Christian god. Heathens need not apply. The Witchfinder General's castigation of sorcery is a lot of fun! And remember, kids, Harold Potter is a witch (warlock?), and there's no nuance in the practice of sorcery, it's all black magic, alright?
Though reading Harry Potter may provide mental relief from your backbreaking work of churning butter, know that it poisons the soul. Watching the Witchfinder General may further aid in lightening you of this heavy burden, though I'm not an alchemist and legally cannot advise you one way or the other.
Anyway, uh, give Atun-Shei a look.
Previously: This "Gen Z Translation" of HARRY POTTER is a total vibe
