New Catholic video game promises to brings family closer to heaven

A new video game called Mass: We Pray brings new family fun to those who can't wait until Sunday to go to church. It has a cross-shaped motion-sensing controller reminiscent of a Wiimote, and you can collect "grace points" in order to unlock holy mysteries. The release date is slated for Spring 2010, but it's available for pre-order now. Mass: We Pray main page via The Raw Feed

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  1. This is a joke, and a poor one at that. (The rosary is a giveaway.)

    I look forward to the Islamic version. (“Shawiira!”)

  2. I call bullshit too. I don’t think the catholic church would be too enthusiastic about having kids pretend to transubstantiate stuff or perform sacraments. I mean, especially girls (bit of a pet peeve).

    The real add: “Families shouldn’t have to wait til Sunday to worship the Lord! Do good works! Go to daily mass! Give the money you would have spent on this dumb video game to help the disadvantaged!”

  3. As someone brought up Catholic, I smell fake. Aside from the general absurdity, two big tipoffs:
    1) Every Catholic church I’ve seen has Mass daily.
    2) The kids do the sign of the cross backwards. Far shoulder first. They aren’t doing it “wrong” (i.e. it’s not sacreligious), just less correct, in much the way that people in movies playing characters pretending to be Catholic are shown to do.

    1. Huh? I was raised Catholic, and we cross ourselves forehead, chest, left shoulder, right shoulder. Which is what they’re doing in the video.

      Still, I suspect bogosity. The transubstantion part is a huge tipoff; despite the fact that Catholic kids have been playing communion since forever, it’s sacrilegious for someone not a priest to celebrate the Eucharist.

      Makk, you laugh about Dance Dance Resurrection, but there is a totally-for-real evangelical DDR called Dance Praise.

  4. lol of course it’s a joke. Real companies do not register their domains in Madeira especially using a 3rd party who is used for many scam and political attack sites. Whois should always be your first check.
    Rua Dr. Brito Camara, n 20, 1
    Funchal, Madeira 9000-039

  5. Let’s pray at the same box that gives us 24 hours news channels,infomercials, and on demand pornography!

    …what the fuck is wrong with this world.

    1. “Let’s pray at the same box that gives us 24 hours news channels,infomercials, and on demand pornography!”

      Better than a “Holy Book,” anyway. You should see some of the stuff they put in books! Even Hitler wrote one!

    1. Most of us already know that artistic judgement is not one of the Gifts of the Holy Spirit, and those who don’t know it are hereby invited to look at any online religious goods catalogue. If you’re newbie, try to keep the denominations straight. They have different preferences in religious tat.

      Anonymous @22, if Holy Mother Church doesn’t do adult baptisms, I have been the recipient of an unreasonably elaborate practical joke — not that that isn’t an interesting possibility.

  6. Alex@14, left to right is a Roman Catholic thing. The Orthodoxy cross right to left.

    None of the above negates the bogusness of the game. I totally agree with boxbrown. Full of suck FTW.

  7. @IronEdithKidd, it’s not presented as an Orthodox ‘game.’

    Although, now I wonder if the Eastern Rite Catholics cross themselves Orthodox style.

    1. Eastern Rite is the Eastern Catholic Churches (you’re using an outdated nomenclature). The sects that identify as Roman likely cross left to right. And yes, it is presented as a generic Catholic game, however, Alex was implying that crossing right to left is a fake movie made-up thing.

      Antinous is dead on. A Christian book store would be all over this shiznit. Icky places, but a must-visit for any self-respecting atheist.

  8. Of course it’s a joke. It’s reasonably well done, but it’s a joke.

    For starters the crucifix “controllers” don’t have an IR window or buttons, so they’re not usable as standard Wii controllers. (Properly done, they’d be plastic attachments that fit around existing controllers, like Nintendo does with its golf and tennis accessories.)

    There appear to be options for performing priestly duties that absolutely would not be permitted to girls, so that’s just right out.

    Finally, there’s no indication of confession-booth groping, or running around the altar to escape the clutches of Padre Pederastia, which really should be the most obvious tip-off.

  9. Pretty silly! Obvs not a real product — the screens are clearly desktop mockups and not real console games. The controllers are home-made props. The listed minigames have too many comedy elements. Etc! Cute site though.

  10. maybe presenting the Rosary as a game would have convinced me and my sisters to participate. (sorry we were such brats Mom!)

  11. I think it’s a joke, but the censer minigame was cute. Maybe it’s not a Catholic game but an Anglican or Episcopal game. Many of the same trappings, but women are allowed to play.

  12. They need to reposition it as an FPS, call it “Critical Mass: We Prey.” Then they’d have something.

  13. Son: “Mommy, Jane has more grace points than me!”

    or

    Dad: “Pray harder son, no child of mine is going to Hell with those homosexuals!”

    Fun for everyone :D

  14. It might be fake, but if you’ve ever been in a religious gift shop, you know that they’d sell it.

  15. The masswepray.com website is registered to a Dr. Brito Camara form Portugal, who seams to have a lot of dodgy sites to his name, a quick google search learns.

    A more interesting scam though, as scams go.

  16. Western Catholics do go the way I was taught in grade school – left shoulder then right shoulder; Eastern Orthodox and Catholic go right then left.

    I did notice viewing a second time though, that the kids are doing it left handed instead of the normal right handed though.

    Doesn’t matter though, unless you’re trying to tell Jesus to steal second.

  17. I checked out the rating on the ESRB site (http://www.esrb.org/ratings/search.jsp) and the results are just as hilarious. Here’s what I got:

    “Your search by title ‘mass we pray’ returned 1 Game Ratings.
    TITLE: ‘Navy Seals: Weapons of Mass Destruction’
    PUBLISHER: ValuSoft Inc.
    RATING: Mature
    CONTENT: Blood, Violence”

    Divine.

  18. I did notice viewing a second time though, that the kids are doing it left handed instead of the normal right handed though.

    Yeah, they’re hitting the right spots but they’re doing it with the wrong hand. I think that’s what made people think they were doing it in the wrong order for Latin-rite Catholics.

    It’s true, though, that Eastern Orthodox and Eastern Rite Catholic churches do the shoulders in the opposite order.

    Doesn’t matter though, unless you’re trying to tell Jesus to steal second.

    Nice one.

  19. Its marketing for the game Dante’s Inferno by EA. Go to the masswepray.com website and click on the link at the bottom about the company, it leads to a trailer for the real game.

  20. I see none of you tried to pre-order it. You’d have discovered the whole thing is a viral campaign for Dante’s Inferno.

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