EZ Cracker egg cracker


This looks like a truly useless, and depressingly ugly device for cracking eggs (which this TV commercial would like you to believe is a big problem).

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  1. Watching these commercials, I always wondered if agents had a special category for professional klutzes. You know, the kind that can’t flip a friggin pancake without starting a fire, or crack an egg without splattering it all over?

    I mean really, I’ve never seen a 6 year old that couldn’t crack an egg at least better than these yutzes.

    1. Those are known as “Fumblefingers”. As in, “I just auditioned for the Fumblefingers role in a QuikMop ad, I was so horrible I just know I’ll get the part.”

  2. Imagine yourself cooking food with a snuggy. The perfect companion for your inner chef. Now that is progress! Warm and stylish. But wait, there’s more! If you call now you can dispense with those cumbersome egg cracking tasks and get the Ez Cracker! The easy cracker will keep your snuggy stylish and your hands clean. Order now!

  3. Haha. I’d like to see someone who can whip up a meringue with a hand whisk (!), but has trouble cracking an egg.

    1. I’d like to see someone who can whip up a meringue with a hand whisk (!), but has trouble cracking an egg.

      Ah, but they couldn’t have done it with the EZ Cracker! It endowed them with magical cooking skills they didn’t have before.

  4. Sure, the EZ Cracker looks like a hunk of worthless junk. But it’s probably earned a zillion dollars. Look at the Snuggly – the blanket with sleeves. Another stupid idea that’s made multi-millions of dollars.

    No one ever went broke by underestimating the American public.

  5. An ez cracker would be great if you worked in a bakery or something, it’s just not something you need around the house.

  6. To each of the people in this video: you’re doing it wrong! Seriously, cracking an egg isn’t that hard, but these people make it look like such a chore, and only because they do it entirely wrong. The one lady crushes the egg in her hand, another is trying to crack it on the broad, round edge of a glass bowl, and another tries to tap it with a fork but bashes it and puts the fork clear through. This isn’t rocket science; they are purposefully fucking this up.

    To add insult to injury, they try to clean up the broken egg by spreading it around with a single paper towel. No single sheet of paper towel is going to absorb an entire egg — hell, paper towel doesn’t really absorb egg to begin with. The stuff is thick — scoop it off!

    I swear some of these infomercial people used to work at FOX News. They are so good at making mountains out of molehills.

    1. Do you really think these performers are that stupid? That’s not what’s going on here. These people are making money because they KNOW people, in general, are that stupid.

  7. Well actually that hard boiled egg is lots easier… Now all I need to do is eat enough egg mayonnaise to justify that, which to be honest I could never justify even if the only thing I ate was egg mayonnaise…

  8. But in one sense I love it for engineering a device that precisely solves a problem even if it isn’t really a problem. I mean, wasn’t that separator attachment slick! and something more to clean…

  9. I’ve often wondered who buys these “made for TV” products given the commercials inevitably make every look like sloppy, brain damaged simpletons unable or unwilling to do the basic things required to live in a house buy yourself. Apparently other things that are TOO HARD without making a massive mess include draining pasta, waxing your legs, making pancakes, sweep the floor, paint a wall and of course, cut or chop anything. I’ve often been tempted to collect a series of these at the “OMG look at the mess” point and splice them together.

    But I’m lazy.. if only there were some simple, cheap plastic product to do that for me.

      1. Wow.. that’s strangely depressing. Though I’m happy how FEW of those I recognized. Everything is indeed terrible :P

  10. I will never, ever buy a newfangled TV infomercial product if the oldfangled way of doing it wrong is not presented in old-timey black & white (sepia tone also accepted).

  11. You know, I don’t have enough difficult-to-clean, salmonella dispensers in my kitchen. This looks great.

  12. Stupid for a person to use but not for an arduino based pee wee herman style breakfast machine.Just think, you can now build and program your own robotic breakfast machine, a lonely lonely breakfast in a flash.

  13. Things like this could be useful for people with hand deformities or other disabilities. Just because you and I can crack an egg easily doesn’t mean everyone can.

    1. I HAVE MULTIPLE SCLEROSIS AND HAVE VERY LIMITED USE OF MY HANDS. THIS GIZMO IS A GOD SEND. I CAN NOW USE AND ENJOY EGGS ONCE AGAIN.

  14. Sorry, Alton Brown says there’s only room for one uni-tasker in the kitchen. I’ll have to keep cracking my eggs the old fashioned way!

  15. I’m not that great in the kitchen and I don’t want to learn how to be. I’d use a tool that makes it easier. Mock me if you want, but you’re all using tools to make your lives easier.

  16. The mechanism for this does look kind of cool, even if I prefer to do it the old fashioned way.

    I might try to build one out of LEGO®, if it came to that.

  17. I can’t believe that no else has commented on the “a $20 value, free with purchase!” line on the bacon rack thingy. Really? that worthless piece of plastic is selling for $20? Where, on earth, is that thing going for 20 USD? I want to go there, because I am in need of a good laugh.

    It makes me think that maybe they just take the schlock from last years infomercials that is filling up warehouses and tack it onto the new schlock, because shipping it is cheaper than continuing to store it.

  18. It amuses me to no end to imagine the life the people in commercials must lead. I envision them just stumbling through their houses, banging their arms on things, hoping that their food comes out or their toothpaste dispenses ( http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NXt8PsoEcgk ). And the rich ones have all sorts of gadgets to clean and cook and play with.

  19. A lotta this kinda crap seems as if it was designed ffor people with disabilities or limeted mobility and at some point i guess someone decided it had mass market appeal

  20. For every EZ Cracker that makes it to market, there must be a hundred Perfect Butter Pats that don’t. It makes me happy to know there are many tinkerers tinking.

  21. Reminds me of the Dennis Miller bit

    “I saw a product, ‘SoftSoap – For messy children’.. Hey, if your kids can’t get bar soap together…”

    Those kids grow up to buy this product.

  22. I’m not trying to start any shit, but I have to admit… if this actually worked quickly and easily… I’d want one.

    I’m not a horrible cracker like they show in the commercial, but I’m no ace cracker either.

    And (if this works) wouldn’t it be great for the disabled and elderly as fartle mentioned above?

    I dunno, maybe I just don’t crack my goddam eggs right… :(

  23. Why all the hate? If the vid was of some happy mutant that had made this out of a coathanger and treebark you’d be all “ooo” and “ahhh”.

    And the Bacon Wave rules! (but put a paper towel under it)

    1. Treebark? I think you mean brass rivets and a vacuum tube.

      The thing about cracking eggs is the cracking point always gets a bit eggey. Typically, the lip of the frying pan ends up with a bit of egg drool that runs down both sides. If this doodad remained clean during the critical egg penetration phase, I might actually wait six months and pick one up at the local dollar store.

  24. I rarely have much of a problem with eggshells getting into my food, but that looks pretty neat to me, honestly. Shelling hard-boiled is admittedly more of a pain though.

  25. At 1.53 a piece of eggshell finds its way into the bowl.

    Easycracker wins.

    Alternatively: crack egg on flat surface holding it from the ends (if you do it right you get no fragmentation at all) and open from the top over the bowl with both hands. No stray fragments from the edge of the crack get pushed in by falling egg.

    If you’re cracking eggs into simmering water for poaching you have to do it that way anyway unless you want boiled fingers.

    My nomination for most ridiculous kitschy kitchen crap is this:

    http://www.amazon.co.uk/Zyliss-Single-Carded-Garlic-Peeler/dp/B00008WX6C

    I can see that it’s possible to mess up breaking an egg, but what can possibly go wrong peeling garlic?

    1. The garlic peeler actually works quite well, though not for fresh garlic.

      I crop my fingernails very short (okay, I bite em off when I think) and therefore have trouble peeling stuff once in a while. That might have something to do with it.

      I tried to reproduce how the peeler works with my hands, but that didn’t work nearly as well. Perhaps they are not callous enough.

  26. My problem is not with the device, but with the advertising. It’s obviously meant for people with disabilities and chefs/cooks who have to crack dozens of eggs rapidly every day, but the ad targets “average” people and gives the impression that they’re somehow talking down to the “average American.” I understand the advertiser’s dilemma, though. If they feature only the disabled and chefs, then everyone else will ignore the ad completely, but if they make it seem like a device that anyone might benefit from, then they get a few more purchases and it registers in the minds of people who might buy it for their arthritic grandmother.

  27. STOP!
    Did anyone consider the product to be useful to people with physical limitations?
    I HATE the commercial, but i recently was exposed to the work done by some very creative people to address the problems of the elderly and those with physical conditions that prevent them from leading “normal” lives, and indeed, some products i used to scoff at i now see with different eyes. It’d be nice if at least 1/3 of the banter here discussed the design and actual feasibility of such product. That’s all. And yes, those informercials are offensively stupid!
    THANKS for reading ;)

    1. Did anyone consider the product to be useful to people with physical limitations?

      Did you consider that those folks get ripped off plenty already?

    2. Actually, that was almost the first thing I thought of, right after “why are these idiots using that much strength?”

      It’d be really awesome for people with various physical problems – they just have an abysmally stupid marketting department.

  28. I expect that chefs who crack dozens of eggs rapidly every day just become very good at cracking eggs. A friend of mine once worked at a factory cracking eggs on an assembly line, and can still crack eggs single-handed with either hand.

  29. SkullHyphy – I cannot think of a profestional Chef I know or have seen wether it be on TV or In life that would think of using a contraption such as this… most chefs I know keep there kitchens simple. Not cluttered with one use items.

    Now as for the disabled or elderly I can see this being a useful item. except most of them dont have the 20$ to throw away on this item. but it is an interesting concept.

  30. Another point:
    According to all the recent Food Network shows (the extent of my knowledge) raw eggs will kill you. Anytime you come into contact with raw egg you must instantly disinfect your hands or die a horrible, eggy (or is it salmony?) death.

    So this device is saving lives! LIVES!

  31. I remember my father telling me, with some awe, about a short order cook he once saw. With one hand and in a single fluid three-hop motion, he would pick up two eggs from one side, crack them, drop them onto the grill, and toss the shells into the garbage on the other side.

  32. To all those people going on and on about how this device is great for people with physical limitations…i call BS.

    Loading/Unloading/Using that device would not be any easier then actually cracking an egg for someone with physical limitations.

    For people that cannot crack an egg, there has been eggs without shells in milk style cartons for ages. Egg Beaters is on brand I can think of off the top of my head. You can just pour out however much you need.

    The only real use for this style cracking would be for some automated device.

    1. I have a friend who is an above elbow amputee who also went to culinary school. He’s always on the hunt for a new gadget or tool that would help him gain more and more independence in the kitchen and around the house in general. This is a feasible option for those that want to use real eggs in a recipe, and not from a carton.

  33. I have a Hand tremor condition and can crack eggs without any problems, most of the time. It all depends on how bad my tremors are, I would really like to try this out.
    I have a friend with Parkinson disease that may find the EZ Cracker a usable item.

  34. People who are simply so inept in the kitchen that they can’t crack an egg shouldn’t be cooking egg dishes in the first place. Hello salmonella!

  35. The easy way to peel a hardboiled egg:

    After a friend showed me how to blow out the egg, I always do it this way.

  36. When I was in the Marine Corps I was assigned to mess duty and was given the job of scrambling eggs. I cracked eggs four at a time (two in each hand) for hours. With a little practice it became easy. It didn’t really matter if a piece of shell got in the mix. The chow wasn’t intended to be good.

  37. This is product for someone who has never cracked an egg since when he was 6 years old. You know, “makes a great present for your wife/mother”.

    #10 jamiethehutt, I’ve seen a guy at a roadside stall who simply cuts the egg in two with a big knife, shell and all, length-wise. Then he scoops out each half with a spoon. The whole thing takes about 3 seconds.

  38. I’d like to meet the person who has trouble cracking eggs, yet routinely makes pie crusts and meringue. That’s gotta be interesting.

    Also, when I eat bacon, why would I want to drain all the grease away? Most of it, yeah, but all of it? Uh-uh.

    Good points about chefs/cooks and people with disabilities. I suppose there may be people for which this is a good thing- just not the people it is being marketed to,

  39. My cooking idol was the late, great James Barber, who used two knives (one big, one small) and wine bottles instead of rolling pins.

    anyone who needs this best stay away from my kitchen.

  40. In the words of Alton Brown, it’s a unitasker, and the only unitasker needed in the kitchen is the fire extinguisher.

  41. She’s making her muffins wrong! You don’t crack eggs straight into the dry mixture. You beat, mix well with other wet ingredients and then fold the mixture together.

  42. Even if the primary market for something is people with some kind of physical impairment, I’ve never seen the advertisers bring themselves to portray that in the advert.

    I used to get a junk catalog filled with thirty-year-old models posing with no-slip socks and those handles that help you get out of the tub. Advertisers are rarely willing to portray their customers as anything other than young and healthy. But sometimes it makes them look stupid or incompetent instead.

  43. So, I too agree it’s a useless product, but I will admit to being particularly clumsy when it comes to separating yolk from the whites, so the little attatchment thingie *did* pique my interest. But otherwise, what Alton Brown says: No unitaskers!

  44. If I were just reading the info on the egg cracker – I might believe it was an invention by an O.T. (Occupational Therapist)

    … we nurses at the psycho-social rehabilitation centre are always at the mercy of such ‘Devices of Daily Living-Aides’ – I wonder if it could be used as a ‘Nut Cracker’ too?

  45. Just watch Sabrina Fair instead. In this, Audrey fails to learn how to crack eggs efficiently, but after watching this I’ve never had a problem. Plus you get to watch Audrey at her cutest.

  46. My friend is incapable of cracking an egg without getting shell everywhere. She just SMASHES it into the side of the bowl. I have tried to teach her how to do it properly but she CAN’T BE TAUGHT. I think she’ll be getting one of these for Christmas.

  47. This reminded me of the Mr. Show episode where they invented “Vaunnies Mustardayonnaise” to “free you from the 2-jar grind” of *Gasp* SEPARATE Mustard and Mayonaise!

  48. Cracking chicken eggs is very easy – I will give you that. But if you cook with duck eggs, like I do, it’s another matter altogether. Duck eggs are notoriously hard to crack due to the thickness of the albumen. I would love to have a tool to help crack them. But I doubt this thingy would do it. I feel that if I bought this, *I* would be the “tool”.

    1. I’m curious about duck eggs.

      Other than the size difference, is there a difference with baking (anything else you have to adjust other than the number of eggs)? With the egg as the centerpiece of the dish (whether the humble boiled egg or something more involved)?

  49. I first saw this advertised on TV Jan 5, 2010 and then found it on the web at https://www.ezcracker.com/Default.aspx?MID=537729

    I am impressed with this egg cracker, but “junky” stuff from TV breaks and never lasts. Might be a bad investment. They never seem to work as well as the ones shown, of course.
    Have been cracking eggs for 5 decades and have not found a way to keep the occasional shell fragments out. They are annoyingly hard to remove, too.

    I like the separator gizmo, too. Saves lots of time.

    Cracking off the shell from a hard boiled egg is very worthwhile, too. A big time saver.

    Bottom line it that I will not buy one unless I can see and touch one in a store. Lower price and saves the S & H and I can judge the quality.

    I use a floor and wall tile cutter and it works so well that I have good dreams about it. LOL

    I am amazed that the people here are mostly negative about it, and they seem to be missing the point that nearly anyone can “crack” an egg. Keeping the shell fragments out is the real goal, though. But it made for some interesting reading.

    As for me, I am on a quest to learn the chef’s secret to that one-handed perfect egg crack that is so common to see on pro chefs’ shows. Doing LOTS of them surely increases the skill level to “amazing”.

  50. I’ve been cracking eggs for a long time. I don’t have a problem with that. I can even do it one handed without shell.

    I DO have a problem with separation of white/yoke. For me it’s time consuming and messy so for me the separator is an interesting addition. Does that mean I’ll buy this product? No. It means I’ll check other resources and I don’t like infommercials much but every once in a while you come across one that’s worth your while. YOUR while, nobody else’s.

    Regards,
    Pete

  51. here come da eggcracka “murderer”
    makes breaking eggz a snappa “murderer”
    I’m da clumsy egg cooka “murderer”
    gotta get sometin like dat “murderer”

    Nah, na na na nah,
    na na na nah, na na nah, na na nah,
    na na na nah

  52. Every time I try to buy something by calling the number on my screen they try to sell you 15 dozen different things before get to the final checkout!! KEEP YOUR EGG CRACKER!! I’ll wait and get it at the “As Seen on TV store”

  53. I would buy for 10 bucks but 20 is too much money for a device they got the Chinese to make them for about 50 cents a piece…

  54. I may sound stupid and worthless, but have you ever tried to ctack an egg with one hand? You see, I have only one functional arm and hand. It’d possible to crack an egg with one hand, but it’s much harder than it seems.

  55. well, i guess done of you guys have had to crack an egg with one hand, and i mean with really one hand. i had a stroke 3 years ago and i no longer have the use of my left arm or hand. so when i crack eggs sometimes i do ok and sometimes i make a mess, so this actually looks like something that would be very helpful to me. i will be ordering one. be glad u have the use of both hands and feet. have u ever tried tying your shoestrings with one hand. stop being so mean and thank God for what u have, u may need this egg cracker some day yourself

  56. When I get on a health kick I’ll eat 100 eggs a week. I gotta try it. I’m afraid of salmonella. It’s rite up there with VD. There is no clean or quick way to crack 15 eggs @ 5:00 in the morning. It get’s on the counter, on the side of the pan, etc. Then you’ve got to disinfect everything you might have touched. Or die? So! I’m just pissed I didn’t think of it. Cha Ching for someone.

  57. Ours broke on the second egg. The blades are screwed into plastic with almost “eye glass” screws….not good.

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