Kepler space telescope discovers a BEER planet

Before you get excited, please note that said planet is not actually made of beer. In fact, it's probably a gas giant, like Jupiter, only way hotter owing to the fact that it sits much closer to its own sun. BEER, in this case, is a somewhat tortured acronym for "relativistic BEaming, Ellipsoidal, and Reflection/emission modulations", a new method of finding exoplanets that could help us spot worlds we might otherwise have missed. Ian O'Neill explains at


  1. I’m thankful that I was born on a planet that has beer. I feel sorry for the Kepler-76b-ians that they have no beer. And when they die, I’m told heaven has no beer. There is simply no beer in your future if you live on Kepler76b. Unless they come here. I’ll crack a cold one for ’em when they do. It’s the right thing to do.

    1. The article doesn’t say for sure that the planet isn’t made out of beer, or that there isn’t beer somewhere on the planet. It does suggest that if there is beer, it’s probably warm though, making kepler76b about as unappealing to visit as England. Better to just stay on planet Earth until we find a planet made out of beer at around 45 degrees. In a universe of infinite planets, there must be at least one.

  2. Picture a rowdy mob of planetary astronomers chanting “WE WANT BEER! WE WANT BEER!”
    Next up, Tectonically Inactive Terran Sized planets.

  3. It sounds like the planet is only near beer.

    Maybe Anheuser-Busch would pay to name it Planet O’Doul’s.

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