Balls Out Bowling: the nudist event splitting opinions

I love bowling!  And I love nudity! But these two delightful things DO NOT go together. Ever. At all. Seems there's some people in Pittsburgh who disagree. 

"Nudity is required with the exception that women can wear bottoms," reports WTRF on the Balls Out Bowling event. "Also, sexual activity is not permitted. Those running the event say nudism does not equal consent and harassment will not be taken lightly. Violators will be asked to leave."

It pains me to be the fuddy duddy killjoy, but am I the only one who doesn't want to line up a 6-10 split with my 1-pin hanging out? 

And I have questions: are you required to wear bowling shoes? Do you realize how ridiculous that's going to look? Are the lights going to be turned alllll the way up?

But here's the real question: Do I feel this way because religion and culture and ego and ageism and social media make us all feel body shame? No! (Ok, partly.) But there's a reason clothing was invented at least 100,000 years ago and hasn't gone out of style since: it protects us from bad weather and dangerous objects. Like spears. And bowling balls. 

So it's not the shame… I swear… it's just a cautious, safety-first approach to life.

I guess underneath it all, I'm envious of people who can let it all hang out, who are comfortable living outside the margins, even if it's only for one cold night in a bowling alley in Steel Town.