We've been on the cusp of calamity for decades, now. Hell, make that centuries. And it's only getting worse. Climate change denied by pizza shop pedophilia conspiracy boosters. Genocides called wars because words with too many syllables force governments to take action. The rise of dead diseases due to feckless injunctions against injections. Power grabs. Land grabs. Grab 'em by the… well, you know.
But hey, let's look away from the void, just for a few moments. Focus on something less fearsome than the fate anyone different than what the rich have decided is normal currently endure. Yes friends, I'm talking about screwworms.
…Screwworms are possibly the most aptly named parasites imaginable, both literally and figuratively. Screwworms—technically, New World Screwworms—are flies that lay eggs on the mucous membranes, orifices, and wounds of warm-blooded animals. Wounds are the most common sites, and even a prick as small as a tick bite can be an invitation for the savage insects.
Once beckoned, females lay up to 400 eggs at a time. Within about a day, ravenous flesh-eating larvae erupt, which both look and act like literal screws. They viciously and relentlessly bore and twist into their victim, feasting on the living flesh for about seven days. The result is a gaping ulcer writhing with maggots, which attracts yet more adult female screwworms that can lay hundreds more eggs, deepening the putrid, festering lesion. The infection, called myiasis, is intensely painful and life-threatening.
The creepy little bastards have been moving north from balmier climates and the dark places where the shade takes little ground from the heat. As we speak, The U.S. Department of Agriculture is in cahoots with the Republic of Mexico, trying to annihilate the little buggers before can make their way any further north, threatening crops, livestock and haunting our dreams.
The good news is that the United States government has beaten back this pest in the past. Back in the 1950s, the United States led a successful charge against screwworms by buggering up their breeding cycle. But that was back when divisions of the government, like the U.S. Department of Agriculture were well funded and well organized.
In our era of DOGE, deep stupidity and deep spite, there's little the deep state can do to get their sh*t together to mount a serious offensive against a problem like the screwworm making a home in us. Hopefully, those that stand to serve us will be able to do a lot with the little they're being left with.
Previously:
• Who put maggots in the Democratic National Convention breakfast buffet?
• Watch – cheese infested with live maggots is a delicacy
• Timelapse video of a fish being devoured by maggots
• Find awe in the biology of these incredible leaping maggots
• Watch 10,000 maggots devour a pizza, if you dare
• Maggot cheese that tries to eat your eyes
• Nostril-wedged maggots of Portsmouth: Otorhinolaryngologist's expert opinion explained
• Flight turns back due to maggots raining on passengers' heads from overhead bins
