130,000 inflatable breasts missing at sea


35 Responses to “130,000 inflatable breasts missing at sea”

  1. Modusoperandi says:

    “Mom! These jellyfish have nipples!” ~ kid on beach

  2. The Unusual Suspect says:

    This thread is useless without photos.

  3. Teresa Nielsen Hayden / Moderator says:

    Takuan: “I suppose you boys have some silly name for these life jackets of yours.”

  4. Teresa Nielsen Hayden / Moderator says:

    Somewhere out there right now, a guy marooned on a desert island is looking up to heaven and exclaiming, “My prayers have been answered!” (That, or “Acres and acres of ‘em! And they’re mine, all mine!”)

    Best. raft. evah.

  5. sammich says:

    Is that a harpoon in your pocket, or are you just pleased to see me?

  6. Takuan says:

    radula, actually

  7. Takuan says:

    smart, tough, sexy, …Dr. Who?

  8. Lauren O says:

    Apparently karma or fate or what-have-you did not want the tasteless “men’s magazine” dehumanizing women and reducing them to their parts. Oh, sweet schadenfreude.

  9. sammich says:

    Mae West = smart, tough, sexy … but dead, unfortunately…

  10. Takuan says:

    (hee! not giving them back!)

  11. ill lich says:

    “Missing at sea”???

    They’re missed here on land too.

    I envision a new cargo cult forming right now on some tiny atoll.

  12. Takuan says:

    never stop a Time Lord.

  13. Anonymous says:

    If there is an afterlife, George Carlin ought to be smiling a very wry smile.

    “‘Teats’ isn’t even on the list.”

  14. TJ S says:


  15. Torley says:

    Therein lies the booty of the boobies. =)

  16. Not a Doktor says:

    Yarr, it bee real lonely on the high seas

  17. MajorD says:

    All those missing boobs, huh? Well I just read that Saxby Chambliss of Georgia won his Senate runoff election with a lot bigger margin than in November. Co-incidence?

  18. Anonymous says:

    Nah. They won’t lose the $200K value of the container, unless their purchasing agent/logistics manager is an utter moron.

    Cargo insurance is cheap — they’ll get that back.

    Can’t do much about the 4.3 billion, though.

    (but I agree — losing that cargo isn’t a bad thing.)

  19. Baldhead says:

    The HORROR!

  20. bnt says:

    I can just hear the captain on the radio to his boss:
    “Bruce? Bruce? It’s Bruce here? No, not Bruce, it’s Bruce? Yeah, we’ve got a problem here? You know that shipment for Ralph? Yeah, that one? It’s all gone tits up out here!”

  21. Tits McGee says:

    Tits ahoy!

  22. nanuq says:

    Just another mystery of the deep. Cthulhu is pleased with this latest offering.

  23. Anonymous says:

    I wonder if this will end up being a boon to climateologists, like the rubber ducks were? Although I think they knew where they were when they lost them…
    Time knows breast

  24. HarryPUK says:

    This reminds me obscurely of Timothy Leary talking about the benefits of cyberspace. I believe he said something about being able to “dive into a swimming-pool filled with tits”. It’s an image I’d really rather not have in my head.

  25. EH says:

    Somali pirates.

  26. zapan says:

    this story reminds me too much of the similar lost in sea bath rubber ducks to be true.

    What a great advertising for an already in $4.3 billion of debt publisher, to make up a totally fake (and totally free) story about them being generous enough to offer free plastic udders.

  27. nigelstwin says:

    Can you imagine what a killer “The Gods Must Be Crazy” film this would make?

  28. Anonymous says:

    So the container was there but it turned up empty? Or the container isn’t there and the shipping authorities are still looking for it? … But the ship arrived intact, yes? With the crew still aboard, alive and sane? No mention of losing half their cargo in a monster storm, or getting hijacked by bloodthirsty buccaneers? … Or if they don’t know which particular vessel their container was shipped on, why would you even suspect a mishap at sea? And how would you know that your empty container is the correct one in the first place? … If they’ve been scammed, or if the manufacturer just screwed up their shipment, why are we supposed to look out for boobs on the beach?

    Yeah, sounds fishy. Any indication this isn’t a viral marketing hoax?

  29. Takuan says:

    sigh, another generation or two and all the Mae West jokes lost…

  30. Takuan says:

    exude a little mucilage, dab a few fronds of kelp and voila! “Stress relief sheets” to flog to the Others for popping fun.

  31. pauldrye says:

    And in other news, Ariel the Mermaid has mysteriously gone from an A- to a D-cup.

  32. urwhatuiz says:

    Soon to be a book by Eric Carle.

  33. Anonymous says:

    In other news the Australian Navy reported that approximately 65,000 sailors inadvertently fell overboard after widespread swells were felt. After being rescued many of the men were babbling incoherently. Some were quoted as saying ” Um Num num num num. Stranger still, many of the sailors whom are married denied even falling into the waters. Several navy men are presenting investing the swells closely while the affected men are being held in the aft section.

  34. Halloween Jack says:

    Thanks for keeping us abreast of things, Cory.

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