Letter from Mark Twain to a snake oil peddler: "You, sir, are the scion of an ancestral procession of idiots stretching back to the Missing Link"

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17 Responses to “Letter from Mark Twain to a snake oil peddler: "You, sir, are the scion of an ancestral procession of idiots stretching back to the Missing Link"”

  1. Anonymous says:

    Hey…..its Mark twain….even after 100 years he can teach us to read, think, and communicate in American. He’s our ultimate treasure: a Truth-teller.

  2. davide405 says:

    Yet another in a l-o-n-g list of reasons to admire Mr. Clemens.

  3. davecity says:

    Interesting closing comment about 1212 Webster. I take it that was his residence during his time in San Francisco. I was recently curious about another bay area address held temporarily by a notable man. 1364 Franklin St in Oakland was where John Muir resided from 1873-74. It’s now a parking garage.

  4. ian_b says:

    so scions sucked back then too?

  5. Anonymous says:

    We should start sending those to anyone selling Homeopathic “medicine”.

  6. Anonymous says:

    Methinks Mark ’twas a Mason.

  7. Anonymous says:

    The introduction of homeopathy forced the old school doctor to stir around and learn something of a rational nature about his business. “You may honestly feel grateful that homeopathy survived the attempts of the allopathist to destroy it.,

    Mark Twain, Harper’s Bazaar (Magazine) , Feb 1890, 80 (477): 439-444
    Reference
    http://www.wholehealthnow.com/homeopathy_pro/mark-twain.html

  8. noah django says:

    fucking this, man. I imagine Twain is presently throttling Billy Mays in the afterlife.

  9. Enormo says:

    but while there is yet time I hasten to wish that you may take a dose of your own poison by mistake, and enter swiftly into the damnation which you and all other patent medicine assassins have so remorselessly earned and do so richly deserve.

    Mods,
    Flamebait. Please disememvowel.

  10. demidan says:

    Damn well done Sirrah! “…Al the way to the missing link.” Brava!

  11. JoshP says:

    Mr. Clemens may be accredited with the invention of the modern American rant. His evisceration of the German language is out on librivox I think. Of course, it is satyrical, no disrespect to our friends from the Fatherland.

  12. XerxesQados says:

    I know Mark Twain was American, but I’m having trouble reading this in my head in anything but a British accent.

    • Anonymous says:

      Of course….up until the late 1940s all Eastern American grammar-school teachers could not be certified until they had studied at least one year in England.(They couldn’t marry either.)
      They had accents, it was de-rigeur. Twain read the great literature…..in English…..but he spoke ‘Missouri.’

  13. Anonymous says:

    Methinks Mark ’twas a Mason

    Correct: Polar Star Lodge No. 79 — http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mark_Twain#Freemasonry

  14. Zergonapal says:

    If you replaced snake-oil salesman with troll that would be a pretty awesome blow in a flame war.
    Except you’d probably get TL:DR responses *sigh*

  15. KWillets says:

    That address is the parking lot for the Church next door, and the site of the famous Western Addition watermelon truck.

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