Spiders made from TSA-confiscated scissors


25 Responses to “Spiders made from TSA-confiscated scissors”

  1. Preston Sturges says:

    I have a pair of scissors with round tips in my shaving kit, and the TSA saw it on the x-ray and went digging for them.  The TSA guy held them up and said  “Aha! I have to confiscate them!” I said ” No, they don’t have points so they are OK.” He asked his supervisor, who told him to give them back to me. 

    I also used to have nice heavy tripod type stand for trade shows, but even in checked baggage it would always get opened, probably because it looked like a 3′ rocket with fins on the x-ray.

    • EH says:

      No, it’s because they’re ‘tards who don’t know what a rocket looks like and they’re not trained to. The TSA is merely a massive data-entry initiative.

      • Preston Sturges says:

        Well I used to put a soup can over the camera mount screw to keep it from stabbing other items or snapping off, so having a dummy warhead on the end didn’t help. 

        • Nonentity says:

          “dummy warhead”

          Aptly named, if it sets off TSA employees.

          I have to wonder what kind of crazy terrorist plot would require smuggling a rocket onto an airplane, rather than just firing it at one…

          • Andrew Singleton says:

            Given the TSA’s sort of logic. Probably something involving the airplane’s door mid-flight and firing at buildings then when the rockets run out slam the plane into something.

  2. Antinous / Moderator says:

    Goddamn bugs cut our hair, Johnny.

  3. hdon says:

    I wonder if he can get his sculptures through a TSA security checkpoint…

    • copperwatt says:

      Lol, and he he tried, and they got confiscated, what would the next artist who bought them off ebay make them into? 

  4. Stitch says:

    Shades of Perdido Street Station.

  5. lavardera says:

    I’d feel so much better if he made something out of my toothpaste.

  6. bugmaker says:

    love to TSA scissorspiders

  7. Donald Petersen says:

    Let me be the first to decry the desecration of these still-useful tools.  Think of the craftsmanship and artisanal machining that went into the creation of every single pair of shears that was carelessly ripped blade from blade and twisted into this wasteful grotesquerie.  I don’t care how fabulously artistic this creation is, it’s an absolute abomination to destroy a perfectly good book… er, typewriter… uh, I mean pair of scissors in this way.

  8. Preston Sturges says:

    It’s the radioactive spider that bit Edward Scissorhands.

  9. HeartlessMachine says:

    You boingers are so good to me.  Thanks, y’all!

  10. BombBlastLightingWaltz says:


  11. Work_Watch_Buy_Repeat says:

    As a note, the TSA checkpoint staff have zero authority to “confiscate” anything.  They don’t have to let you on the plane, but they can’t TAKE anything from you — all they can do is ask you to “voluntarily surrender” it.

    • Rindan says:

      Most people will pick losing a pair of scissors or a bottle of shampoo over missing a flight to paying to rebook.  

      What upsets me is just how fucking cowardly Americans are these days.  We keep voting these dip shits into office.  The only conclusion is that Americans are a bunch of fucking cowards that piss them selves over a 1 in a few million chance of being killed by a terrorist.  

      Not only are Americans god damn cowards, but they are stupid as shit.  The piss that trickles down there leg when they think about their one in a few million chance to die of terrorism doesn’t make it to their shoe before they slam a few Big McMacs with jumbo sized fries into their diabetic maws.  They fail to appreciate the irony of blowing hundreds of billions of dollars on a threat that ranks somewhere below shark attacks, all the while working diligently to kill themselves in a very assured way with the shit they shovel into their faces.

      Looking at the TSA and Homeland Security in general makes me feel nothing but shame with how pathetic the character of the average American has become.  We are stupid, ignorant, and pathetic cowards.

  12. jgalette says:

    Uh, is anyone else wondering how this guy is getting his hands on the things the TSA confiscates?

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