Maybe you've heard of Elsa Frozen Brain Surgery -- you know, the game where you open the popular Disney princess' skull and extract fashion items from her glittering brain morass for her to wear later.
"Once you’re sure she needs a brain surgery, start shaving her gorgeous blonde hair and prepare her for the long surgery hours," the game instructs. "Then feel free to dig into her brain and make sure you use the right doctor tools to cut out her little obsessions, to repair whatever you find broken and to reactivate the dead synapses snowflakes." Dark.
Of course, Elsa Frozen Brain Surgery is just one of the weird little games hoping for a sliver of the explosive princess brand recognition. Today I also found Baby Elsa Spinal Surgery, where the starring princess becomes a child with inexplicable but deeply-unsettling back wounds, as well as Olaf at the Dentist ("The pain and the shame are unbearable, so he is asking you to play the dentist role for him.")
My friend Peter Yeh has offered us an eye-opening look at some other items out there: Apparently, poorly-cloned Disney princesses need everything from slimy makeovers to new bathroom wallpaper, in addition to appearing in barely-functional knockoff Super Mario-alikes and hundreds and hundreds of paper doll dress-ups.
Apply nitrous to Princess Anna's face in her birthing simulator. Then, of course, there is Spank Elsa Butt (maybe don't watch that at work).
Peter's piece will set you on the right track toward the very weirdest bootleg Disney games. You can find even weirder ones if you want, I bet. Peter just sent me the following "Sins of the Frozen" video, a haunting compilation of everything from Elsa Toilet Decorator to some odd-looking accelerated-aging game. Probably just don't do any of this at work. Or maybe ever.
In celebration of Zelda: Breath of the Wild, Allen Pan built a wonderful home automation system where the interface is an ocarina as seen in The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time. (Thanks, Lux!)
The Offworld Collection, presenting the very best features and essays from Offworld, is finally available to buy directly from Campo Santo for $40. I had the pleasure of designing and illustrating this splendid 250-page hardcover volume, but it’s the excellent writing, edited by Leigh Alexander and Laura Hudson, that makes it an essential buy. You […]
The technology to create emotionless, plastic-faced “uncanny valley” animation is getting cheaper, and those placed in charge of using it are giving less and less of a fuck. Oh god somebody posted this on /vg/ pic.twitter.com/odCG56fJjq— Pepipopa (@Pepipopa) March 16, 2017 Another compendium here from xLetalis.
All the filters in the world won’t save your smartphone pics from a shaky hand. To really step up your mobile photography game, you’ll need some kind of mount to hold it steady. You could buy a smartphone attachment for a conventional camera tripod, but who wants to carry that kind of gear everywhere they […]
The forced transition from analog to digital TV signals was probably met with relative indifference from people with Netflix subscriptions and the “I don’t even own a TV” snoots. But anyone living in the vast swaths of the country that don’t have guaranteed high-speed internet, broadcast TV is a perfectly valid (and 100% free) way […]
When Apple revealed the new MacBook in 2016, one of the biggest issues raised with the notebook’s new design (aside from ire over the slew of new adapters you’d inevitably have to buy) was the removal of one of its most beloved proprietary features, the magnetic charging cable. Thankfully, third-party peripheral makers have taken up […]