Maybe you've heard of Elsa Frozen Brain Surgery -- you know, the game where you open the popular Disney princess' skull and extract fashion items from her glittering brain morass for her to wear later.
"Once you’re sure she needs a brain surgery, start shaving her gorgeous blonde hair and prepare her for the long surgery hours," the game instructs. "Then feel free to dig into her brain and make sure you use the right doctor tools to cut out her little obsessions, to repair whatever you find broken and to reactivate the dead synapses snowflakes." Dark.
Of course, Elsa Frozen Brain Surgery is just one of the weird little games hoping for a sliver of the explosive princess brand recognition. Today I also found Baby Elsa Spinal Surgery, where the starring princess becomes a child with inexplicable but deeply-unsettling back wounds, as well as Olaf at the Dentist ("The pain and the shame are unbearable, so he is asking you to play the dentist role for him.")
My friend Peter Yeh has offered us an eye-opening look at some other items out there: Apparently, poorly-cloned Disney princesses need everything from slimy makeovers to new bathroom wallpaper, in addition to appearing in barely-functional knockoff Super Mario-alikes and hundreds and hundreds of paper doll dress-ups.
Apply nitrous to Princess Anna's face in her birthing simulator. Then, of course, there is Spank Elsa Butt (maybe don't watch that at work).
Peter's piece will set you on the right track toward the very weirdest bootleg Disney games. You can find even weirder ones if you want, I bet. Peter just sent me the following "Sins of the Frozen" video, a haunting compilation of everything from Elsa Toilet Decorator to some odd-looking accelerated-aging game. Probably just don't do any of this at work. Or maybe ever.
The first time Merle Rasmussen played Dungeons & Dragons, he thought it was a Halloween game.
“It was October 1975, and I was an 18-year-old freshman at Iowa State University. My roommate got this game filled with skeletons and undead monsters. I had no idea.” The role-playing bug had bitten him, but fantasy wasn’t his genre. So that same year, he started writing a game set in a modern world, the spy game that would become Top Secret.
The Lost Arcade, a documentary about the encroachment of gentrficiation upon the last real video arcade in Manhattan, is now available to watch online. Directed by Kurt P. Vincent, the story is as much about the Chinatown Fair’s community as the games, celebrating the final years of a pop culture phenomenon that moved into our […]
Reason Magazine’s C.J. Ciaramella filed a Freedom of Information Act request with the FBI for the Bureau’s file on TSR, the company that E Gary Gygax founded when he created Dungeons and Dragons (now a division of Hasbro).
Although flagship smartphones are unlikely to adopt heavy-duty outer casing anytime soon, you can always prepare your device for the outdoors with a beefy case and and an external battery like this Nomad Tile Trackable PowerPack, available in the Boing Boing Store for $119.95.The Nomad Tile can fully recharge an iPhone 7 over three times […]
Even though credit cards now feature an EMV chip for securing transactions, they still have to include the magnetic strip for compatibility with older point of sale systems. Because of this, there’s no way for the chip’s new security capabilities to protect against card skimmers in the wild.How do you protect yourself from legacy-technology-induced fraud? […]
As the old saying goes, “You should sit in meditation for 30 minutes every day. Unless you are too busy, in which case you should meditate for an hour.” Since most of us have an endless list of things to do and people to see, carving out quiet time can feel impossible, especially when most […]