Boy, I sure hope we don't get sued for leaking these trade secrets! R. Stevens says,
Apple is a very secretive company. But not even Steve Jobs himself is more powerful than a trained psychic with a Mental Amplifier Helmet and a mission. In order to cut through all the hype and rumor, I descended into a sensory deprivation tank filled with Dr. Bronner's Magic Peppermint Pure-Castile Soap and put my mutant brain to work.
This t-shirt lists every single feature of the impending Apple tablet computer with stunning 900,000 percent accuracy. Each piece of information was plucked from the skulls of the designers by Richard Stevens III, American's Most Vigorous Psychic and is guaranteed stranger than fiction.