"He knows when you are sleeping, he's knows when you're awake" takes on a whole new meaning when an omniscient Zuck on a Truck replaces the old do-nothing Elf on the Shelf. This too-close-for-comfort "parody" ad shows us what happens when algorithms lead to a insurrections.
"Elf on the Shelf can only see so much. That's why this season, no secret is safe," the ad starts.
"Introducing, Zuck on a Truck! With the power of Facebook's massive database, your personal Mark Zuckerberg knows absolutely everything," the narrator continues, as the creepy little Zuck on a Truck blabs everything from what is inside the Christmas packages to the fact that mama is having an affair.
But those little secrets are nothing compared to Zuck's "Yuletide algorithm," which allows the all-knowing doll — "who takes no responsibility for your dangerous behavior" —to know who's been naughty and who's been nice — and to thus "connect all the naughty children in your neighborhood" for a good ol' fashioned MAGA-sytle Yuletide riot. In other words, you better watch out — Zuck on a Truck is comin' to town.
