Similar to what it might be like for someone living in the 1980s to stumble across an iPhone from the future, Chicago's ABC7 meteorologist Greg Dutra was utterly amazed to find out, while reporting live, that his weather map was actually a touch screen. (See video below.)
"What? No waaaaay?" he said when his map reacted to the touch of his finger. Dutra spent the next 30 seconds grinning ear to ear while playing with his new toy, exclaiming, "It's a great day! It's a great day!" He later explained that he'd never gotten a thorough rundown of the newsroom since he was onboarded just before the pandemic hit, which sent him home for over a year. When he returned, nobody remembered to clue him in on some of the finer (as in incredibly useful) details of the job.
It's not often one gets to experience the joys of technology as pure magic.
CPAC has taken to the arts, featuring an installation of a forlorn MAGA man sitting in his prison cell contemplating the idiocy that led to this new reality. Passersby are offered a headset that plays "harrowing testimony" from Jan. 6 insurrectionists, according to journalist Laura Jedeed who posted the video below. According to journalist Jordan Fischer, the actor in and creator of the performance piece, called "Walk Away," was a real J6 insurrectionist who actually did walk away after snitching on his fellow rioters. Although presumedly meant to pull at conservative heart strings, tightly tuned to the key of Trump, all others are free to laugh out loud.
Hello I would like to share with you the most astonishing thing I have ever seen
At this CPAC booth you receive a silent disco headset that plays harrowing testimony from people arrested for participating in J6
Jack in the Box fired Mark Hamill when he worked at the fast food joint as a struggling actor many decades ago. Back then, the food chain didn't appreciate it when Hamill got into Jack-in-a-box character, taking drive-thru orders with a clown voice.
Cut to 50 years later, after fame, fortune, and the force of Star Wars, and Jack in the Box was all too happy to take him back — at least for a day (and a commercial) — in which he finally got his shot at amusing drive-thru customers with his clown routine. Of course sheer delight set in once the drivers rolled up to the pick-up window and discovered the pop-up employee behind the voice. (See video above)
A highly alarmed Tucker Carlson was the first to report on the breaking news about Jon Stewart last night. The comedian is shrinking!
"He's shrinking, and disheveled, and very short! Really short! Too short to date?" questioned the faux news investigator who once said it's best to marry a "nice and hot" date who cries when she's mad. "Was he always that short? What happened?" a flummoxed Carlson asked (see video below).
Carlson's squeaky panic then turns into a bromeopathic growl. "Where's he been the last seven years!?"
It's all very mysterious. Perhaps Stewart has been feminized by Covid, or perhaps the former Daily Show host's testicles are in need of a tanning session — but not to don't worry, whatever the cause, the faux news network will get to the bottom of it, as Carlson has asked his audience for any clues: "If you know, let us know." Will do, sir!
Qongresswoman Lauren Boebert really stretches with her latest conspiracy warning: monkeypox is part of a government conspiracy to skew the midterm elections.
"I think it's interesting, we have midterms elections coming up and suddenly there's a new health emergency from the federal government," said the Qongresswoman from Colorado.
The stable genius forgot to give credit to Spain, Portugal, Belgium, the U.K., Brazil, Canada, and many other countries around the world suffering like martyrs with the latest monkeypox epidemic, all for the sake of empowering the U.S. cabal.
Lauren Boebert suggested that monkeypox is part of a government conspiracy to impact the midterm elections.
Boebert: "I think it's interesting, we have midterms elections coming up and suddenly there's a new health emergency from the federal government." pic.twitter.com/GWD9GBefI6
A Southwest passenger flying from Tucson, Arizona to Las Vegas posted a bizarre-looking video on TikTok that showed her sitting next to a shattered window that had a large piece missing (see video below). Without any further description, it looked like the hole led right out to the blue sky behind it.
But in later posts, she said that in reality, only the inside layer of the window – made of plastic – had broken after she had simply leaned against it.
"As soon as my elbow applied any type of slight pressure, as soon as that happened, the whole window just broke, shattered, the whole thing," she explained.
She said she called a flight attendant over, whose "jaw dropped" at the unusual sight. "She hits a 180, she runs on over to the pilot's cabin," the passenger said, and after speaking to the pilot, the attendant came back to assure the passenger that everything was safe — the outer protective window was enough to ensure an incident-free landing.
Joaquim Martins, a professor at the University of Michigan and expert in aircraft design, told Insider that while he hasn't seen a plastic barrier break on a plane before, it didn't pose any safety threat.
Martins said the plastic part of the window is not impacted by cabin pressure. Instead, the outside glass window absorbs all the force.
Non-structural items breaking on planes is "perfectly normal" Martins said, and the virality of the video probably came from the shock of what appeared to be a broken window.
Martins clarified that had it been the actual glass panel, "stuff would be getting sucked out, and she would have had to put on an oxygen mask."
In the end the airline offered the passenger a $300 flight voucher as a peace offering.
Last month it was "Biden's woke military" that enraged Marjorie Taylor Greene. Now Georgia's top conspiracy theorist is fuming at the FBI for allegedly releasing a warning list of symbols hijacked by white supremacists and other violent militia members that we need to watch out for.
"Like the Gadsden flag," she says, looking at the list. "That's a common flag. I actually have it outside my congressional office."
She goes on to list some of the other symbols targeted by the gazpacho police, including the Betsy Ross flag and "2nd amendment logos," which she says is "pretty terrifying, when the FBI now considers 2nd amendment logos to be violent extremism — that means our government is turning against the American people."
No Madge, it's not the American people they are turning against. And no, it's not the logos themselves the FBI considers to be dangerous, but rather the space-laser Q-nut extremists who wear or hang these symbols outside their doors. See the full clip below.
Marjorie Taylor Greene, who has hung out with militia members herself, is upset that the FBI has released a guide of symbols to identify violent militia members.
Greene: "I actually have [the Gadsden flag] outside my congressional office." pic.twitter.com/iROEHwrnLI
Remember Madison Cawthorn, the bible-thumpin' gun-totin' lawmaker who tried to bring a loaded firearm through airport security not once but twice? The sore loser voted out of Congress after he ratted out his Republican colleagues for their coke-fueled orgies? One might think the GQP's fallen star has been waiting out the rest of his congressional days in hiding, but no, turns out he's just been LARPing in all his spare time. Let's just hope the gun he's wildly waving around isn't loaded this time.
In one of Randy Rainbow's more passionate and catchy parody musicals (set to A Chorus Line's "Dance: Ten, Looks: Three"), the singer arms himself with gallows humor as he takes aim at NRA-fearing Republicans and their "Hallmark" thoughts-and-prayers. (Watch the mini-musical above.)
Thoughts and prayers Tweet your corny last respects Screw the laws and background checks Who needs common sense Sing a psalm like Pence! …
While they're taking shots Just think happy thoughts … Take your thoughts and prayers And go fuck yourself
Front page thumbnail image: "Thoughts and Prayers" by Randy Rainbow
Passengers aboard a Veuling flight heading for Rome on Sunday traveled not into another dimension, exactly, but at a low altitude around the wondrous land of England's south coast — before the plane returned to the boundaries of Gatwick Airport, where the flight began. The surreal trip was not that of the passengers' imagination, but instead the result of the plane having too much fuel, according to Yahoo! — yet another hiccup in the airline industry's already chaotic summer.
From Yahoo!:
The plane flew around the south coast of England for one hour and 51 minutes, according to Flightradar24. While the aircraft was circling, its altitude ranged from 5,900 to 8,000 feet, Flightradar24's data showed.
After almost two hours, the plane landed back at Gatwick Airport about 11:30 p.m., according to Flightradar24.
Some apparent passengers tweeted about the incident.
"After 5 minutes from the take off the pilot found out there was too much fuel on the plane," Francesco Ricci tweeted. "Now they are back in Gatwick and removing the unnecessary fuel." …
Plane-fuel problems add to the list of issues that passengers are facing during a chaotic travel season. A Delta Air Lines plane had to make a U-turn over the Atlantic Ocean last week because of a fuel imbalance, the airline confirmed to Insider. One passenger on board the flight told Insider he was terrified and thought he was going to die.
In addition, the crew of a Qantas Airways plane recently had to declare an emergency to get priority landing because the plane had only 40 minutes' worth of fuel left.
Arizona's slippery Big Lie supporter Kari Lake, who earlier this year called abortion the "ultimate sin," was near mum on the topic at a press conference today — one day after Kansas voters made it clear they want abortion to remain legal in their state.
When asked if she would advocate for more restrictive abortion laws if she becomes governor, Lake dodged the question by saying, "We have great laws on the books and we will work with those." When the reporter pushed harder, asking if she was okay with Arizona's [very strict and confusing] abortion laws, Lake completely ignored the reporter, pointing at others in the crowd in hope of a safer question. It'll be interesting to see how other Trump-fearing Republican candidates handle the topic of abortion before the midterms now that the people of a Republican-heavy state have spoken.
At a press conference today, Kari Lake is asked if she will advocate for more restrictive abortion laws, since it will remain legal in AZ through 15 weeks based on AZ statute about to take effect. Just like Desantis, she dodges this question. pic.twitter.com/4q2w4dHJEp
Honking at a pickup truck who nearly sideswipes you in the Sunshine State? Probably not a good idea, at least not for this Reddit user, who quickly realizes his mistake. Watch how the Reddit user reacts to the truck driver's suspicious "moves" (including allegedly waving a weapon, although it's hard to make that out in the video), using some quick-thinking maneuvers that helped him outsmart the erratic Florida man.
Click to expand
Front page thumbnail image: Ty Hearn / shutterstock.com
Cruel actor Alex Jones looks utterly confused in court, shaking his head with the most knitted brows one will ever witness, as the judge patiently tries to teach him the definition of "hearsay." Of course, "hearsay" is a tough word for Q-followers to understand, but Jones isn't actually a conspiracy theorist — he just profits from them.
Using strategy from the Claire McCaskill playbook, the Democrat Party helped Michigan's Trump-backed congressional candidate John Gibbs beat incumbent Rep. Peter Meijer — one of 10 Republicans who voted to impeach Donald Trump. Although the move — gaming the system by supporting the more extreme Republican — has worked in the past, it's risky, not to mention sleazy.
"I'm proud to have remained true to my principles, even when doing so came at a significant political cost," Meijer said.
If the far-right Gibbs happens to win in November, we'll have yet another Big Lying conspiracy theorist in congress, thanks in part to the Democrats who invested more than $400,000 into his campaign. This is the same Q-infused former missionary who in 2016 claimed Hillary Clinton's campaign chair "participated in a satanic ritual involving bodily fluids," according to The Guardian. And whichever way the vote goes, the few remaining moderate Republicans in Washington will be less apt to step across party lines in future votes.
From The Guardian:
He [Meijer] published angrier words on Monday, lambasting Democrats who spent campaign dollars in support of Gibbs, seeing him as beatable in the midterms in November.
In an online essay [on Monday], Meijer said: "The Democrats are justifying this political jiu-jitsu by making the argument that politics is a tough business. I don't disagree.
"But that toughness is bound by certain moral limits: those who participated in the attack on the Capitol, for example, clearly fall outside those limits. But over the course of the midterms, Democrats seem to have forgotten just where those limits lie."
Republican voters, Meijer added, "will be blamed if any of these candidates are ultimately elected, but there is no doubt Democrats' fingerprints will be on the weapon. We should never forget it."
Two overzealous cops and a third companion in Land O' Lakes, Florida went up to the front door of a house when nobody was home and took it upon themselves to pry off the lock. They saw nothing wrong with busting into a house while the residents were gone in the name of evictions. Only problem was, they got the wrong house.
"Hello? What are you doing" a woman's voice said over a security intercom.
"Uh, we're here to finalize the eviction."
"What eviction!?"
After a bit of back and forth, a bit heated on her side, the cops sheepishly realized their mistake. Turns they not one out of three grown men had read the address correctly. Good thing she had a security system that allowed her to intervene before she came home to an empty house.
The already gruesome InfoWars host Alex Jones just got a little more gruesome today when he eagerly asked the judge at his trial if he could show her something from his mouth that nobody should ever see. The absurd scene began when the judge noticed him chewing in the courtroom.
"Spit your gum out, Mr. Jones."
"It's not gum," the far right conspiracy theorist replied.
"Well what is it? Because you're not allowed to have any food or gum of any kind in the courtroom."
The conservative bully, who has put parents of Sandy Hook Elementary school victims through "living hell," explained that he recently had tooth surgery. "I had some gauze in there earlier and it's causing me to have some pain."
"So you're chewing on your gauze?" the judge asked, barely concealing her disgust.
"Would you like me to show ya?" he eagerly asked, as if he were holding a stack of prized baseball cards. He then tried to show her the hole in his mouth, and explained how he had to massage it, but the judge made it clear she was not interested. The exchange ended with a final, "Sit down!'
WATCH: "Spit your gum out Mr. Jones," Judge tells #AlexJones. He proceeds to tell her he had a tooth pulled and he was "massaging the hole with his tongue", then wants to show the judge. Judge, "Sit down". pic.twitter.com/Ws7ggjo1Uk
Like something out of a natural disaster movie (a common theme in weather clips around the world these days), footage from Alberta, Canada (below) shows hail taking out an entire car window as passengers duck, cover their heads, and shriek. The hail — the size of baseballs — was part of a storm yesterday that smashed through windows of at least 70 cars, according to GlobalNews.
A recent Bank of Canada survey asking Canada's biggest insurance companies about their top concerns showed climate change was at the top. The weekend's hail storm in Alberta shows why. pic.twitter.com/rlbWz2NGV8
Even though insurrectionist Guy Reffitt was sentenced to more than seven years in prison after storming the Capitol on Jan. 6 with a handgun, and even though his own teen son reported him to the FBI and says his father deserves the sentence, his brainwashed wife stands by her man.
"We are patriots," she said. "Guy was a patriot that day. … He's a loving husband. He's a loving father," she claimed about the man who threatened to shoot his own children.
She then had some choice words for the media, "All I can say…[takes long dramatic breath]…is that y'all can all go to hell, and I'm going back to Texas." Deprogramming isn't easy, and this sucked-in MAGA member is going to need one helluva team to pull her out.
Nearly six months after attacking Ukraine, Russia is desperate for fresh blood, as seen in this ludicrous attempt at wooing expats (see video above). Sounding like a Tucker Carlson pitch calling out to fellow incels in need of a change, the ad boasts of Russia's "delicious cuisine" and "cheap gas," then cuts to little girls running through a field as the ad highlights Russia's "beautiful women."
"Traditional values, Christianity, no cancel culture, hospitality, vodka," the ad continues, sticking to the MAGA theme. And then for the ominous cliffhanger: "Move to Russia. Don't delay. Winter is coming." Whatever that's supposed to mean.
Euronews says the video was produced by a "pro-Russia group called Signal" while MSN says it was "shared by a Russia Embassy." But I say it was a spoof after coming across the real ad:
А вот и правильная реклама Великой и Прекрасной России подоспела!!!!
The United States killed al-Qaeda's 71-year-old Ayman al-Zawahiri yesterday, as announced by President Biden. In 2011 President Obama announced the death of 9/11's terrorist Osama bin Laden. And then there's the former game show host, Donald Trump, who in 2019 could have been reading from a child's picture book — "He died like a dog" — when he announced the death of ISIS leader Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi. Compare the three with this Trump-roast sandwich:
