Snowflake Rudy Giuliani nearly cracked his head and died after being "attacked" by a passerby in a supermarket (see harrowing video above). Or at least that's what the disgraced former Trump attorney is bellowing on about after a market employee slapped him on the back yesterday.
"I feel a shot on my back like somebody shot me. I went forward, but luckily I didn't fall down," the skittish New York mayor-turned-slipper peddler said. "I mean, suppose I was a weaker 78-year-old and I hit the ground, cracked my skull, and died." (Yes, and suppose I walked outside and, from out of nowhere, a bolt of lightning struck me in the skull and I died.)
"My back hurts, but otherwise I'm able to walk and stuff like that," continued the Big Lie promoter, who is still battling ongoing defamation lawsuits brought against him by Dominion Voting Systems. "He almost knocked me down. Thank God for a 78-year-old, I am in pretty good shape."
The "assailant," who was an employee of ShopRite on Staten Island, where Giuliani was campaigning for his son, Andrew, was arrested and "charged with second-degree assault," according to Axios. Nobody has the right to aggressively touch another person, but it's hard to believe from the market's surveillance footage that Giuliani's life was in danger.
"I've been in politics 50 years, I've never been attacked like this," the assault survivor said. If only everybody could count themselves so lucky.
Here's his follow-up about the incident (video below), in which he doubles down, claiming, "I got hit on the back as if a boulder hit me. It knocked me forward a step or two. It hurt tremendously." Yep, that's exactly what it would look like if a boulder had been shot into his back.
Front page thumbnail image: mark reinstein / shutterstock.com