It's always Halloween at Costco. Which is why the Big Box Bulk Buy Bargain Store just launched a new, uhh… *checks notes* … six foot tall, motion-activated, singing punk rock skeleton?
From the official product listing:
This 6' Skeleton Punk Rocker raises the dead with this punk rock music. He's been dead for 2 decades releasing his solo music to raise the dead that will shred your soul as he shreds his guitar. His rocking tunes will make your head roll, literally. Soon you'll be joining him in the underworld. He's motion-activated with spooky sayings and comes with a timer function, 6 hours on, 18 hours off.
• Light-up LED eyes
• Motion sensor activated
• Realistic head turning & jaw movement
• Plays music and spooky phrases
• Right-hand moves to play guitar
• Tombstone guitar
• Approximate dimensions: 21" W x 43" L x 72" H
• Approximate weight: 20.9 lbs.
• Timer: 6 hours on, 18 hours off
• Power cord
• Assembly required
• For indoor & outdoor use
• Accessories not included
• This is not a toy
As of press time, Jerry Only has not commented on that theft of his likeness.
If you're not punk enough for this, there's also a pair of podunk dueling banjo skeletons for sale.