Liberal hunting permit


A few conservatives kindly pointed out that the entry about the Republican Clown College was not fair and balanced. So, in the interest of fairness and balance, here's a little light hearted conservative-made humor poking fun at liberals -- a "Liberal Hunting Permit."

No Bag Limit - Tagging Not Required. May be used while under the influence of alcohol. May be used to Hunt Liberals at Gay Oride Parades, Democrat Conventions, Union Rallys, Handgun Control Meetings, News Media Association, Lesbian Luncheons, and Hollywood Functions. MAY HUNT DAY OR NIGHT WITH OR WITHOUT DOGS
Liberal hunting permit


  1. I get this sense you’re not taking the demands for fair and balanced seriously.

    I mean, there are plenty of Republican entertainers who don’t advocate violence against liberals, like Ann Coulter, just like there are non racist Republican entertainers like like Rush Limbaugh.

  2. Oh…that’s…really funny…very funny. I mean, yeah, I’m laughing. Of course I am *eyes darting* oh, ha ha ha. Yes. Very funny, we are all amused. Yeah, Palin 2012, great *sees panic room* I’m just gonna go in here and get my checkbook…let me write a donation out. Go s-s-Sarah…

  3. So painting clown faces on ‘pubs is “balanced” with inciting the murder of “liberals”? Um, okay.

  4. these aren’t anything new. I’ve had a Texas “Terrorist Hunting” Permit since 2001. replace “Terrorist” with “Liberal” its the same thing.

    suppose though if I want a “Teabagger” permit I’m going to have to make it myself.

  5. Fair? Please don’t tell me you are going to start worrying about offending these pigs.

  6. @artbot – I think that may be the point? When the wingnuts bring teh funny, they usually -um- don’t.

  7. So, in response to drawing on photos of conservatives (a la drawing moustaches on people in textbooks), you believe ‘fair and balanced’ is advocating for murder of liberals.

    These words you use, I think they do not mean what you think they mean.

  8. what a knee-slapper! i like the way it’s so subtle, nothing overstated, not too broad a brush. but it’s lost on ya if ya can’t read.

  9. Well, spelling rallies as “Rallys” is pretty darn funny, even for dumb conservatives. Morans!

  10. If BB didn’t bite the hand that feeds every once in a while, it would cease to be BB

  11. Oh good lord people. This thread is also proving there are plenty of humorless liberals too. Can someone post sad clown faces of liberal leaders and Move On?

    Mark: you might be able to get a conservative hunting permit from:

  12. #16: It seems that politics is a toxin that makes everyone humorless nuts.

    Fixed that for you :P

  13. …I think this proves my point in the clown post.

    “…a conservative with photoshop and half an hour wouldn’t be able to think of anything vaguely amusing/clever to do with it.

    See: The 1/2 Hour News Hour”

  14. Real republicans prefer the government to take a hands-off approach re: the liberal hunting.

  15. #10 POSTED BY DR.HYPERCUBE, MAY 5, 2009 2:26 PM

    I think that may be the point? When the wingnuts bring teh funny, they usually -um- don’t.

    Agreed, the best they can come up with is that broken, depressing, miserable, cowardly shell of a “man”, Dennis Miller. He attempted a thing that would be competing with The Daily Show right now… but he failed miserably.

    Humor takes a certain level of intelligence that the wingnut side can’t muster. That’s why they despise the rest of us so much.

  16. Anybody have any genuinely funny examples of conservative wit? The only one I can think of is a bumper sticker I saw shortly after the last V.P. shot that guy in the face. It said “I’d rather go hunting with Cheney than driving with Kennedy.”

  17. There’s three dead cops in Pittsburgh already because of this kind of “joke.”
    And there was another case in Bangor, Maine, recently of a right-wing gun nut trying to build a dirty bomb — a story that got very little coverage.
    The leaders of the GOP should be condemning such talk from their followers, but their silence is deafening. The blood will be on their hands.

  18. Ahh, the rtrd right… They seem to think that liberals do not own weapons. I do..a benelli shotgun, a tactical AK, and a 45/410. Roommates are equally as armed and two of us are ex-military. Please try us armchair warrior wingnuts…

  19. So joking about murdering your fellow Americans is comparable to joking about folks who are acting like a bunch of clowns?

    Sometimes it’s best to just let the whiners whine and not give in to pressure…

  20. From reading these comments, I’m beginning to gather that it is NOT o.k. for me to go on a multi-state liberal killing spree? No? Figures. Damn liberals and their namby-pamby no-liberal-slaying-laws.

  21. “So joking about murdering your fellow Americans is comparable to joking about folks who are acting like a bunch of clowns?”

    Er, you didn’t really get my point, did you?

    1. It’s a whooshfest.

      On a lighter note, living in a resort, we have bumper stickers that say: Why Do They Call It Tourist Season If You’re Not Allowed To Shoot Em?

  22. Mark:

    Yeah, that clown collage was speakin’ truth to power, all right. Boy, you shure showdt us iggnerant rednecks Republicans a thang or tu about yer sophisticated city-folk post-modern sense of i-ro-nee an hows ya’ll’s pal dekonstructed the parrydime of official portrayture by usin’ that thar clown makeup. Boy, ah just feel like I wuz put in mah place.

    Yap, I took that there sticker REAL serious-like when ah got it at the gun show and it shur represents 99% of my fella Republicans. Boy you shur are percpetive and don’t do none of that stereo-typey business on 50 million Americans. Ah ain’t nevvvver seen no hate speech on that old MyDD or Kos or anywhere else against mah side of the po-litical fence.

    1. you shure showdt us iggnerant rednecks Republicans a thang or tu

      The sign doesn’t actually say Republican on it, but thanks for owning it.

      1. Also, it’s ‘ignant’ not ‘iggnerant’. You obviously don’t have any redneck friends.

  23. The point is that the Conservatives think that shooting people — and invoking the days of Grand Fiery Crosses — is funny, but are deadly offended at being portrayed as clowns.


    Nevar forget the long horse rage that rides on the long horse

  25. The long slow decline of conservatism has officially started. Good.

    I’d rather you have bumper stickers than representatives in the Congress.

  26. Brainspore @23: Wm F Buckley, P. J. O’Rourke, Christopher Hitchens – they say funny stuff about liberals. Even that notable lefty Alexander Cockburn has some evisceratingly funny remarks about proponents of global warming. Oops, I mean “our deteriorating atmosphere.”

  27. “Boy,”

    I only recently found out that one of the victims of that shooting was an old philosophy professor of mine. (It’s bitterly ironic that he’s a well-respected researcher of evangelical and Pentecostal religious movements, though in my case I learned my German philosophers from him.) One can lay many fair accusations at the feet of the political left in America, but it’s the right wing that excels at murder from fear.

    – National Broccoli

  28. Cowicide@39: “Nevar forget the long horse rage that rides on the long horse”

    You are right. I guess I should avoid trying to being sarcastic, because some people don’t get it and they just flip out.

  29. #37 as a half-Mexican lesbian, I’m sure as spit more afraid of clowns than the KKK.

    Clowns are creepy, yo.

    (Oh, also #19? I’ve been to Pink Pistol shoots. They’re really nice folks who believe everyone should have basic gun knowlege.)

  30. @bardfinn thanks for explaining it. That always makes jokes sooooooo much funnier. ;)

  31. puttin’ 1 of these on the Missus’ Prius. we’ll use no-lead ammo, so’s not to pallewt


    I think you’re still being sarcastic there and I’m PISSED.

    1. What’s the word for inability to perceive irony/sarcasm? There must be something comparable to anhedonia for inability to experience pleasure or ametaphoria for inability to understand metaphors.

  33. @national broccoli

    Yeah, few things have upset me more than that. Full of bitter ironies, the silencing of free speech proponents.

    ps: it’s “the boy”

  34. Teller #44:

    Any faves you’d like to share? This thread looks like it’s gonna go downhill fast, so we could probably all use a laugh.

    1. This thread looks like it’s gonna go downhill fast

      This isn’t the bottom? Shit.

  35. I can’t believe the number of people who didn’t get this. It’s a parody of the kind of “fairness” and “balance” practiced by Faux News, and their use of the typically right-wingnut tactic of false equivalence. It also shows the difference between liberal humor and what passes for “humor” on the right: we make fun of them, they threaten to kill us. They think these are the same, because a) they think being ridiculed calls for a violent response and b) they have dramatically less respect for human life than liberals do.

    (Note that I’m not using the word ‘conservative’ here. There are conservatives, but they’re the center in American politics. The “right” is composed of frothing ideologues like Rush and Coulter.)

    The right are basically the thugs who beat you up and stole your lunch money in junior high. You grew up. They just aged.

  36. I’ll share a couple faves. Boomsday, by Christopher Buckley is an hilarious must read all about those frequently insufferable baby boomers. And C. Buckley’s No Way to Treat a First Lady for some reason pulled me out of a paralyzing depression. It had this amazingly uplifting effect on me. Effervescent political and social satire. Highly recommended.

  37. In 400 years when the USA falls apart, watch for the Red States to have their theocratic rump state, free of taxes and any bill of rights. they will claim that their christian nation is the true successor and fulfillment of america, when it will sadly be the poison distillate of fear and authoritarianism that can only be described as un-American.

  38. You know Boing Boing bills itself as “A Directory of Wonderful Things.” Yet somehow politically oriented topics are posted frequently. I see nothing wonderful about those topics. As a conservative I do get offended by this, but I am mature enough to not complain about it. We all know that Boing Boing has a very leftist slant to it. Do I complain? No. I expect that from this site.

    However, I would not post a whole new topic for the sole purpose of mocking people who pointed out that the Republican clown face topic was really not called for.

    1. the Republican clown face topic was really not called for.

      Not called for? Grandma, is that you?

  39. Oh, and Teller: Wm F Buckley never says anything funny anymore. While the quality of his discourse may have declined (its quantity certainly has) its moral content is definitely much improved recently.

  40. “Anybody have any genuinely funny examples of conservative wit?”

    How ’bout this one, a bumper sticker given out at a mid 80’s Republican Convention in California.

    “AIDS-Killing all the right people!”

  41. Brainspore, with regards: From Wm F:

    “Liberals claim to want to give a hearing to other views, but then are shocked and offended to discover that there are other views.”

    “I’d rather entrust the government of the United States to the first 400 people listed in the Boston telephone directory than to the faculty of Harvard University.”

    And just cuz:

    “Scientists are people who build the Brooklyn Bridge and then buy it.”

  42. This is probably much funnier if you don’t live in a state where any damn body can get a carry permit, where liberal is considered a code word for communist, and where the governor just said we ought to secede from the US.

  43. Okay, now I’m certain it’s true: Sarcasm makes smart people sound like little children.

  44. @44: I wouldn’t classify Hitchens as a conservative; more as a contrarian. He sided with the neocons/PNAC on geopolitics, though also wrote a quite good atheist polemic, “God Is Not Great: How Religion Poisons Everything”, which should ensure that he doesn’t get invited to Republican rallies any time soon. And he has been known to gore the sacred cows of the right, like Mother Teresa.

  45. Anybody have any genuinely funny examples of conservative wit?

    Republicans complain that government doesn’t work, then get elected and prove it.

    – PJ O’Rourke

  46. William F. Buckley considered science a “liberal” pursuit? And all this time I thought he was supposed to be one of the smart ones.

    I agree those quotes were reasonably witty but not particularly funny. I was kind of hoping for something that might make milk shoot out of my nose. Who is the Jon Stewart of the conservative movement?

  47. I didn’t even look at the Republican Clown thing – I’m used to BB being one sided politically and didn’t feel the need to comment about it. I don’t think the Liberal Hunting Permit thing is funny either.

    The funniest Republican bumper sticker I’ve seen so far is the Oshit sticker.

  48. I wouldn’t be fucking with union rally[sic]s. You know, teamsters autoworkers, miners, steelworkers; that might not be the best place to find passive targets.

  49. I sometimes think Mark creates posts just to generate comments. I’m looking forward to Untitled 3.

  50. Due to the Cheney clause, you don’t have to get this permit or report your shooting until at least 24 hours after you shoot something.

  51. “,,,and Texas became a penal colony where a 35year old looking John Wayne is the current war lord.”

  52. A famous sage once said, “If ‘elitist” just means ‘not the dumbest mother fucker in the room’ then I’m an elitist.” The number of people in this thread who just don’t fucking get it drives this home.

  53. Brainspore — “William F. Buckley considered science a “liberal” pursuit?”

    Yes, science is traditionally considered part of a liberal education. You might want to brush up on your history of western civilization. Up until even as late as the 20th century a classical education included Latin and other such subjects but not necessarily a grounding in science or the scientific method. The idea that children should be taught critical thinking and real science is still controversial in many parts of the US.

    Conservatives would like to repeal the reformation if they could.

    1. If I start a Rum, Sodomy and the Lash Party, can we form a coalition government?

  54. Teller @61, so the examples you give are

    1) A not humorous common accusation about liberals. The accusation has a fair bit of truth to it but there’s nothing about it that’s funny.

    2) A statement that has no humor value and is simply standard conservative anti-intellectualism.

    3) A statement bashing scientists.

    Yeah, that’s real funny.

    There may be examples of genuinely amusing conservative quips but so far I’ve only seen a single one in this thread (the Cheney/Kennedy quip). (FWIW, I’ve seen genuinely funny comments by Scalia)

  55. Noen, I knew that many conservatives have that view of science. I just didn’t know that Buckley was among them. After all, he was open-minded enough to try smoking pot just to see if the laws banning it were justified (verdict: no).

  56. The maker of that “permit” may not be aware that it’s also a good way to get liberals into a gun store.

  57. “Mark: you might be able to get a conservative hunting permit from:

    Kewl! It’s about time we start learing how to defend ourselves. That way, after the US turns into a theocracy and comes to cart us ho-m-sekshals to “reeducation camps,” we won’t go down easily and we won’t go down alone.

    See, Libruls aren’t adverse to defending themselves from attack. They just don’t try to kill their political enemies, like the rightwing does.

    Ok, seriously … does anyone else find it scary that the US has turned into a country where a political movement advocates killing its opponents?

  58. @#66 – brainspore

    Are you really attacking conservatives because we don’t have a Jon Stewart? Is he REALLY the last best hope of liberalism?

    Conservatives are criticized for being without quality humor, as if this hunting license were in some way representative; further, the definition of good humor is Republicans in CLOWN MAKEUP?

    Seriously people – I hope you have a more nuanced view of politics than is represented by the majority of comments here. I, for instance, am anti-bush, pro-gay marriage, anti-judicial activism, pro-life, anti-taxes, and for legalization of drugs. Where do I fit in?

    Snc m flng lk lghtnng rd tdy, lt m sy ths: dn’t s hw ny rsnbl prsn cn b fr rstrctv gn cntrl.

    Vry fw ppl rg gnst msrs prvntng gns frm fllng nt th hnds f crmnls nd th mdly mpssnd; crtnly wn’t mk sch n rgmnt hr. Bt cn smn tll m WHY t s s mprtnt t rstrct hntng rfls & hndgns? Rstrctns dn’t kp gns t f th hnds f crmnls; gns r lss dngrs t hm thn swmmng pls; lst, t’s n th Cnstttn! Why s ths prblm, ppl?

    1. Even though hunting permit is part of the title of the post, this isn’t a soapbox for 2nd Amendment rights. You have been warned.

  59. The other unintentionally funny thing about this hunting permit is that it displays the US as consisting entirely of red states. Here’s a shout-out to President John McCain (laughs).

    Either that, or the artist was a communist. :-)

    1. Here’s the problem with Gun Control/2nd Amendment comments: They’re usually NRA talking points from astroturfy users, either brand new users or ones who never comment on any other subject. BB doesn’t have a position in favor of gun control. Regular reader/commenters rarely bring the issue up. And yet, there always seem to be plenty of anti-gun control comments. Showing up to argue against a point that nobody has made is a pretty transparent attempt to drop some propaganda into a thread.

  60. I would like to join the Lesbians Who Lunch. Where do I sign up for this fine organization?

  61. @84 Why do you need a gun? Seriously… gimme a good reason. Fear isn’t a good reason. Recreation isn’t a good reason either. Neither is ‘because it’s in the Constitution’.

  62. I mean, there are plenty of Republican entertainers who don’t advocate violence against liberals, like Ann Coulter,


    “My only regret with Timothy McVeigh is he did not go to the New York Times Building.” — Ann Coulter, 8/20/2002

  63. @ RhoOphuichi #85:

    Are you really attacking conservatives because we don’t have a Jon Stewart? Is he REALLY the last best hope of liberalism?

    Like you, I don’t have loyalty to any political party and I certainly don’t vote based on who I think is funnier. I was merely making an observation that there seems to be a big “humor gap” on the Right side of the political divide. Stewart was just an example.

    Then again, the Left doesn’t have many good action film stars or NASCAR drivers.

  64. @#85: “Are you really attacking conservatives because we don’t have a Jon Stewart? Is he REALLY the last best hope of liberalism?”

    I think he is saying that the conservatives’ problem isn’t that they DON’T have a Jon Stewart; rather, that conservatives seem to be INCAPABLE of having a Jon Stewart. Well OK, I don’t have any idea what he was trying to say, but I’m saying it. A good example is Dennis Miller, who went from being an insightful skewerer of both left and right, to the shrill anti-Cassandra we’ve enjoyed since 9/12/2001.

    Part of the problem is inherent, I think: satire only really works when you are punching up, not down (cf. the bumper sticker #60 cites as an example of “funny” conservativism). But most of it is self-inflicted. The few examples of good humor from the right that exist — P.J. O’Rourke and Chris Buckley being the best cases — have become either appropriately embarrassed by the antics of their fellow supporters (O’Rourke) or run out of the club on charges of apostasy (Buckley, fired even from the publication his father founded.)

  65. @#85: “I, for instance, am anti-bush, pro-gay marriage, anti-judicial activism, pro-life, anti-taxes, and for legalization of drugs. Where do I fit in?”

    You don’t. Your views will never be represented in our government. Understand that “conservatives” don’t think like you do, and they represent a much larger minority than pseudo-libertarians like yourself. The polarization between “liberal” and “conservative” doesn’t involve you so it shouldn’t concern you. Nor does it involve me. It does however involve roughly 90% of the rest of Americans, and they are the ones getting elected and making the laws.

    I just sit over here in my corner and wonder about how great it would be if an openly atheist socialist could get elected to office in the US, knowing that will never happen. It’s lonely, but I’ve moved on from hoping for nuance in American politics. I’m just a spectator to the culture war, not a participant.

  66. @17 – “It seems that politics is a toxin that makes BB commenters humorless nuts.”

    Clearly I underestimated the mind numbing power of clowns, guns and politics. This thread doesn’t even aspire to “humorless nuttiness” anymore.

    It’s the only way to change people’s minds!

    — MrJM

  67. I just got back from my handgun control meeting and BOY IS THAT STICKER FUNNY

  68. Mark @ 70, living in Georgia, I’ve seen almost every one of those stickers. I try to defend the south as not being as bad as some people think. Then again, sometimes it is. The conservatives around here are notable for having zero sense of humor, and even less ability to hold a meaningful discussion.

    As a side note, the most liberal person I know also owns 12 guns. Three of them have taken lives in various hands. One killed his mother, the other two were used in wars.

  69. Can’t somebody make the local ‘wingers happy and link to Barak the Magic Negro?

  70. Noen: Thanks anyway. Even I wasn’t thinking that.
    B-spore: Hey, you only asked for examples of conservative wit. The anti-liberal lines were a bonus.
    The rest of you who impugned my taste in humor, you are all bastard people.

  71. #90

    not a conservative but i don’t really call myself a liberal either but the reason i am about to own a gun is because i live in the country and i want something big, loud and intimidating to scare off and/or shoot at (only if i need to) coyotes that want to eat our livestock – especially since we have seen some that are rabid – and to scare off bears and cougars.

    in fact there was a cougar attack in the middle of our town just yesterday.

    i don’t plan on hunting or killing any people, though =)
    PS – the cougar attack was on a dog and he will be okay

  72. @ #62 Nancy Jane Moore

    I’m guessing you mean Texas, and one of the great things, IMO, about Texas is that the Liberals here are just as well or better armed and shoot back (if not first).

  73. @ Teller 98:

    OK, fine. But I’d still like to hear an example of conservative humor that might make me laugh. Or at least something that made you laugh. (I mean this with all due respect.)

  74. I just want to check: We can’t change this into a firearm thread can we? Some folks are making comments about guns that I would like to respond to, but that would pretty much derail the thread about political humor.

  75. #58 POSTED BY JUDGEDREDD says, ” … As a conservative I do get offended by this, but I am mature enough to not complain about it. We all know that Boing Boing has a very leftist slant to it. Do I complain? No. I expect that from this site. However … [JD goes on to complain] … ”

    Ok, I take it back about conservatives not being funny. It’s just that when are they are truly funny, they don’t do it on purpose. Your post was case and point.

  76. Brainspore: George Will was making a speech at some place like the Cato Institute. He’d been at the mike for a while. He said:

    “I know I’ve been talking too long because the people who were looking at their watches are now listening to them.”

    No milk? No? Ah, well. I like my humor dry.

  77. @ #99

    What do you think people do in other countries where the locals don’t have access to firearms? People have been dealing with wild animals for centuries, certainly there are some good ideas out there for deterring them.

  78. SpookyInteraction@103: Iowahawk’s a pal, and one of the funniest writers I know.

  79. This thread seems to go on and on so I question this will even be read but:

    There was a comment above about scientist, my freak-o republican brother had a comment or two that was derogatory towards ‘scientist’. I was too scared of what he might say to explore his remark…

    Is the gop or smaller subsets of the gop trying to invalid science in some way? Is there some sort of liberal-science tie in going on that I’ve missed? Or am I reading too much into a few comments?


  80. @106 “People have been dealing with wild animals for centuries, certainly there are some good ideas out there for deterring them.”

    people have also been walking everywhere, using candles, cooking over a fire pit, killing animals for food, etc. for centuries too. Would you also propose giving up the modern conveniences of automobiles, electricity, grocery stores? Could you fend off a rabid coyote with a pointy stick? Maybe? Should you have to when there is a modern tool that is more effective? No.

  81. Lovin’ it, Mark. Thanks.

    It’s like a fruity nutty oaty bar, studded with tasty chunks of Antinous and cowicide!

  82. @KEVINC – No, Conservatives are as interested in science as Liberals are. I don’t believe the sort of people that made the sticker this thread was based on represents the vast majority of Conservatives – at least, that’s my take on it.

  83. KevinC: I think it was prompted by a quote from the late Wm F Buckley. “Scientists are people who build the Brooklyn Bridge and then buy it.” It’s not a political statement, it’s in the school of Einstein mis-buttoning his sweater. These geniuses can build a complicated structure, but are befuddled by real life. You know, the absent-minded professor.

  84. MARK FRAUENFELDER, first you complained that people didn’t get the irony of your joke about murder. Then you said that you had pissed off a lot of people and achieved your goal as a member of the Guns and Dope Party. Which is it? Or was that irony also? Since the Guns and Dope crowd generally hate poor people, I gotta wonder.

    By the way, this thread has just been godwined by your captcha. One of the words I need to type in order to post is ‘gestapo’.

  85. The way I see it, posting conservative “humor” also qualifies as making fun of conservatives. They’re self-taunting.

  86. STEPHEN, first you complained that I complained. Then you said that I said that I had pissed off a lot of people and achieved my goal as a member of the Guns and Dope Party. Then you asked “Which is it?” Then you asked if I was being all meta-ironic-like. Then you introduced a nonsensical non sequitur falsely claiming that the Guns and Dope crowd generally hate poor people. Then you wondered about something or other. Then you told us a Michelle Bachmann style story about an ominous coincidence.

    Guess what — YOU WIN!!! [sound of fanfare, fireworks going off, balloons being released, gold colored crown placed on Stephen’s head] Hurray for Stephen!

  87. Okay, kids, some news that none of you is gonna like.
    America needs both liberals and conservatives.
    When I was a kid (young goat) I read where Thomas Jefferson once said “Heaven forbid that we should be 20 years without such a revolt.” I misunderstood him to mean that he expected regular revolutions. He didn’t. But all my life I’ve wondered how America has kept its balance. In explaining it to my son’s buddies, it came to me: The Pendelum.

  88. KevinC: Yes, there is a definite segment of the modern conservative movement in the United States that sees science as bad. One sees a bit of it in Canada also. Prominent examples include Sarah Palin bashing fruit fly research (see ),
    and Bobby Jindal bashing “Something called `Volcano monitoring'” ( ). These are but some of the prominent examples. McCain made similar remarks, and there were serious issues with some of his campaign’s answers to the science debate questions (gratuitous plug: I discussed this at ) This is part of a general anti-science attitude in the right-wing.

    This isn’t unique to the US. For example, in Canada, the one of the ministers in charge of science issues ended up being a chiropractor who apparently has issues with evolution (see Boing Boing’s own discussion about it and the comments thread therein ). As far as I’m aware this is mainly a US and Canadian issue and it is primarily a US issue.

    Now, this doesn’t mean that the American left has been angelic by any stretch of the imagination. The American left is particular fond of medical pseudoscience. At this point, the community of science bloggers are more or less disgusted at the Huffington Post for becoming the central repository of a lot of medical quackery. But the level of prominence of such individuals is much lower on the left than on the right. One doesn’t see these comments being made by Democratic governors or vice-presidential candidates.

  89. Oops, I spotted an error in the post:

    Somehow, it got posted under “Funny” by accident, instead of “Flamebait” where it obviously belongs.

    The only funny thing is that it successfully trolls people at both ends of the political spectrum, while leaving the 5th wheel of American politics (Ron Paultard iconoclastic libertarians) befuddled and confused. (Then again, Paultards tend to have that reaction to both scratch’n’sniff stickers and words containing the letter “Q”, so make of that what you will.)

  90. “Pendelum.” Great, now I’m going to wonder for the next half hour about whether I missed a clever/macaroni pun or if the author is illiterate. Prendre=take? Penser=think? Argh!

  91. Antinous, that’s interesting. Have you ever tried looking to see if the IP addresses of such new commentators are from the same range?

  92. So much of conservative humor reminds me of schoolyard bullying rather than insightful mockery or even playful ribbing. Fox News’ lame attempt at a Daily Show rip-off, The Half-Hour News Hour, was mostly mean-spirited and one-sided, and ultimately not very funny. I admit that sometimes the Daily Show can be mean-spirited, but to their credit they have no problem with making fun of themselves (“themselves” meaning both liberals in general, and their own show/network), so when they are mean spirited I can’t take it too seriously.

    Mark was justified in posting this as a “balance” to the conservative clown college– the guy who made this sticker thought it was funny, just like the guy who made the clown college thought it was funny; one made by a liberal for a liberal audience, one made by a conservative for a conservative audience.

    Consider this: I know plenty of liberals who enjoy a good Bill Clinton joke, but try telling a Sarah Palin joke to a conservative and see where it gets you. I really think the main problem (especially as evidenced by the last year) is that the GOP has been hijacked by the far-right, by people who think they are on a mission from God, and so are overly serious and mostly humorless.

    One of my favorite jokes from ages ago:
    Q: How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
    A: “That’s NOT funny!”

    Substitute “conservative” for “feminist.”

  93. Unlike you liberal flipfloppers at least the conservatives are consistent: Whether in their humour or their politics their desire to kill other human beings remains firm.

  94. Example of conservative humor:

    “Both books… and Trent wasn’t even finished coloring one of them.” — Arlen Specter on news that a hurricane destroyed Trent Lott’s entire library.

    Oh wait… Specter’s a Dem now.

    — MrJM

  95. @ 121 TroofSeeker
    “America needs both liberals and conservatives.”

    I don’t know what America “needs” but I do think it’s helpful to have opposing forces. I’m not sure they must be con vs. lib. James Carville had an interesting interview on Charlie Rose last night and he made a good case that the US goes through these generational waves of one party dominance every 30 or 40 years. According to him, and I tend to agree, we are leaving the GOP Reagan period and entering the Dem Obama period.

    The GOP has lost an entire generation to the Dems. They bet on the Southern strategy of courting white southern racists and evangelicals and now that demographic is in serious decline. It worked well for them thoughout the last half of the 20th century but it has stopped working and is unlikely to again. They need to come up with something new.

    The Dems will eventually fail but it won’t be soon.

  96. Dan Quayle also had a sense of humor. After the whole Gore inventing the internet thing came out (which isn’t what Gore actually said but never mind that) Quayle released a press releasing saying that he had invented the spellchecker.

    (For those too young to remember: Quayle was mocked for misspelling “Potato” when he had a guest appearance at an elementary school spelling bee)

  97. Thank you Mark, for translating Stephen’s comment. Although, I am a little embarrassed that I’m admitting it.

    “Wait, I don’t hate poor people! Wait, am I poor person? Wait, poor people get stoned and own guns! Wait, I’m stoned and I own a gun! Wait, I AM a poor person. Wait, no the Guns and Dope Party hate poor people. Nah, man (bong pull) I don’t hate myself.” Phew.

  98. @ ILL LICH:

    The crass generalization that feminists are all ‘humorless’ (as well as ‘ugly’, ‘hairy-legged’, ‘lesbians’, ‘man-haters’, blah blah blah) is a load of BS, meant as an insult, and just another way to try and write us off. It is just as bad as broad brushed Conservative ‘humor’. FAIL. That shit is played OUT.

  99. @ SeattlePete #95 – “Your views will never be represented in our government…[it] doesn’t involve you so it shouldn’t concern you.”

    Are you really arguing that the disenfranchised should give up? Tell that to MLK. Tell that to Obama.

    @Joshuaz #122

    I agree that a SEGMENT of conservatives is anti-science, but when you later say that there is a “general anti-science attitude in the right-wing” I have to take issue. It is perfectly valid to question some aspects of science / Modernism. In The God Delusion, Dawkins himself says that the issue of an ultimate cause (the underlying assumption of the big bang) is debatable; the PoMo movement questions the values of Modernism. Would you characterize atheism or post-modernism as ‘conservative’? I think it is possible to have some debate on these issues – particularly on the issues you cited. All of these are criticisms of the use of FEDERAL money on these projects; this is less about science, and more about philosophy of government.

    Funny Conservatives
    Disclaimer: Some of these people are dead. Some are only funny on accident.
    Dave Barry
    Vince Vaughn
    David Spade
    Drew Carey
    Kelsey Grammer
    Bob Hope
    Jim Belushi
    Bruce Willis
    Jimmy Stewart
    Norm McDonald
    Kurt Russell
    Alice Cooper
    James Woods
    Denzel Washington
    Dennis Hopper
    Gary Oldman
    Sarah Michelle Gellar
    Heather Locklear
    John Malkovich
    Ted Nugent
    Clint Eastwood
    J.C. Van Damme
    Chuck Norris
    Dana Carvey
    Jeff Foxworthy

  100. MARK FRAUENFELDER, first you complained that people didn’t get the irony of your joke about murder. Then you said that you had pissed off a lot of people and achieved your goal as a member of the Guns and Dope Party. Which is it? Or was that irony also? Since the Guns and Dope crowd generally hate poor people, I gotta wonder.

    By the way, this thread has just been godwined by your captcha. One of the words I need to type in order to post is ‘gestapo’.

  101. @ RHOOPHUICHI, awesome- I didn’t know this list existed and had no idea about many of the celebrities listed -thank you. I’m concerned that your post will be removed or DV’d.

  102. OK Mark, I am still not getting what he is saying, still. Are godwined and captcha slang? Stephen, I would ask you but am not sure I would get it.

    Is “Stephen” an iPhone app that randomly generates troll-ish sounding statements? If not, DIBS!

  103. Wait, did you mean Godwin’d (past tense-d verb for Godwin’s Theory) and CAPCHA? Well can’t memba what the acronym stands for.

  104. Rhoop @ 135.

    There is a general anti-science attitude among the right-wing. It is very hard to argue against that claim when you have the Republican vice-Presidential candidate, the Republican Presidential candidate and now the most prominent up and coming Republic governor making the sorts of comments they have. The Republican leadership either has a very anti-science attitude or thinks that enough of their base does that they think that acting anti-science helps.

    I don’t know what most of the rest of your comment has to do with anything at all, since no one is talking about modernism or the existence of God or any similar issue. The issue is attitude towards science. Not general philosophical disagreements.

    Meanwhile, claiming that Palin, Jindal et al. were simply discussing the use of federal funding that’s pretty clearly not the case if you look at their statements. Palin never said about the relevant fruit fly research “This is interesting research. If it pans out it will really helpful in direct ways to a lot of farmers. But I’m not sure that federal funding is a good idea for reasons X,Y.Z” Palin said “ometimes these dollars go to projects that have little or nothing to do with the public good. Things like fruit fly research in Paris, France. I kid you not.” Now, a quick point: Many people thought she was referring to Drosophilia research when she initially made the comment. But the only item in the federal budget with any of it going to Paris that seemed at all connected was research in actual fruit flies (as in the nasty kind that ruin plants). So this was actual, practical research. We aren’t talking about nuanced debate about where federal money should go. We are talking about simple anti-science attitudes.

    And Jindal’s remarks were similar. Meanwhile, as I pointed out in the piece about McCain, one gets the impression that the campaign simply didn’t care about scientists.

    And these are just a handful of examples like McCain’s attack on bear DNA research we he then repeated even after it was explained to him why it was useful.

    The fact is that McCain, Palin, Jindal and others use science spending as their knee jerk example when they want to claim there is a need for budget cuts. And they parade out ridiculous caricatures of the matters in question (seriously Jindal, “something called `Volcano spending'” in a prepared speech? Maybe you could look it up. Or you know, think for 5 seconds).

    And this is before we get to other examples where the Republican Party has been unkind to science. I’ve neglected to discuss any of the ridiculous things that the Bush administration did. Or discuss the problems with Newt Gingrich’s compatriots. This is a pattern which has been going on for a very long time. There’s a reason that over 70 American Nobel prize winning scientists endorsed Obama . The Republican party has just gotten to be that bad on science issues. Again, that’s not to say that the Democrats are ok, but that the Republican party as it stands has serious problems. Whether you prefer to label that a general attitude or a segment of the party that happens to have control over the major party leaders is more a question of semantics than anything else.

    Now, moving on to your list: Some of the people you list are in fact comedians. But simply cutting and pasting a list of celebrities who are either Republicans or have conservative leanings doesn’t help matters. Many of the people listed such as Bruce Willis, Van Damme Chuck Norris, and Sarah Michelle Gellar are actors not at all known for their comedic ability. Moreover, some of the people on your list have been dead for some time (Jimmy Stewart died in 1997). Some of the people on the list also aren’t conservative by their own description. Dana Carvey has quite complictated political views as discussed in this interveiw for example: Finally, even if we look at the actual, living, conservative comedians on that list, almost no one on that list has humor that is related to their political views.

  105. Rhoophuichi: I like most of your comment EXCEPT Obama as disenfranchised?? He went to Punaho, Columbia and Harvard. That ain’t disenfranchised. That’s the old boy road to Eliteville, which is where he is right now.

  106. @ Anonymous #135:

    Way to fight the stereotype of feminists as being humorless by getting indignant and offended by a joke about feminists being humorless.

    (And I’m a LIBERAL!)

  107. STEPHEN is a consarned bot written by the sworn enemies of the NeoWobblies, Them What Musn’t Be Named. Kata will sic codeHound after it!

  108. I defy anyone to explain to me how “Day by Day” is funny or even makes sense. Aside from Chris Muir’s total lack of artistic ability.

  109. @135 ANONYMOUS & @145 BRAINSPORE

    Would you believe, I once told my sister that joke, and she spit the punch line back at me, not realizing that it was the punch line?.


    As BRAINSPORE pointed out, it’s not about mocking feminists, but mocking those who take themselves too seriously.

    I am trying to think of an example of conservatives playfully mocking themselves and can’t, but I’m not privy to much intra-conservative banter besides what’s broadcast on TV and radio. Any conservatives here want to let us in on that? Do you guys have private jokes about having to “get the rod up your ass replaced with something straighter” or asking a waiter “do you have any white bread whiter than this?”

  110. A great example of conservative humor was the poll that indicated a majority of republicans would vote for George Bush over George Washington!

    Cause, yes Bush was that awesome!

  111. Enough in-fighting! Let’s do another “Hands Across America” — that worked before.

  112. Wait.

    There are conservatives who read boing boing? I’m not sure if that’s true.

    Unless it’s like the conservatives who watch the Colbert Report and don’t know it’s a parody. (It actually happens all the time.)

  113. It seems to be the case the world over that the further to the right you go the less laughs there are.

    Strictly speaking I should say that the further away from liberal moderate democratic principles you go the fewer laughs there are.

    They are just not funny people at all.

  114. @Antinous:

    “Showing up to argue against a point that nobody has made is a pretty transparent attempt to drop some propaganda into a thread.”

    When the entire thread is a self-congratulatory, disingenuous attempt at satire as apology for pointless mockery, propaganda is something of a step up.

    Yes, conservatives aren’t very funny. Judging from this thread, neither are liberals. How about we dump the idiotic flamebait “Haha my political stance is funnier and therefore better than yours” crap and return to, I dunno, wonderful things?

  115. This thread is now about sarcasm. It wasn’t before, but it is now.

    [cow lights up a torch, whips his long horse steed in the ass and rockets towards a hay effigy of dennis miller]

  116. Rawr Rawr Rawr I love politics,
    Rawr Rawr Rawr I hate the other side,
    Rawr Rawr Rawr Where is my unicorn chaser!

  117. @44 Teller

    Dude, Christopher Hitchens is an ex-Trotskyist, anti-theist, atheist, and constantly refuses to associate himself with conservatives and conservative ideology.


    Not funny. I blogged this years ago

    Is that particular license you linked to actually real? It looks very official, as if it was issued by the State of Massachusetts. I doubt anyone with a valid sticker like that would get in much trouble capping a few dirty hippies.

    I do think tagging should be required though. That part makes me furious.

  119. I was at a truckstop near Green Bay, WI and saw one of those hunting permit bumper stickers for “illegal immigrants,” right next to the Jesus and anonymous man kneeling in prayer before a cross car decals. Because there’s nothing that Jesus loves more than killing Hispanic women and children with your remington.

  120. @ 155: “Strictly speaking I should say that the further away from liberal moderate democratic principles you go the fewer laughs there are.”

    Hey now. Pretty much the only thing Anarchists have managed to do is crack jokes about ourselves.

  121. See, yeah, that’s indicative of the differences between liberals and conservatives. We joke that they are silly, they joke that we should all be destroyed.

  122. Hilarious? Hmm.

    This may be a part of the ideological divide, but it seems like “liberal” people rarely use threats of violence as a kind of humor. Probably because it’s really not that funny most of the time.

    It also seems to me, us Liberals, have a bit of a monopoly on humor: The Onion, Al Franken, Stephen Colbert, John Stewart, Hollywood, etc.

    Conservatives need to learn to laugh at themselves too and not just “the other”.

  123. @STR1CKEN

    No. It isn’t.
    Atleast ONE conservative has joked that all-liberals should be destroyed, it is by no means the entire movements mandate.

  124. Rhoop@136: Your list is highly erroneous. Did you make this up yourself?

    Dave Barry: Self professed Libertarian and very critical of both major political parties in this country. Most Libertarians I know would be pushin’ back their barstool and gettin’ ready for a fight if you lumped them in with conservative Republicans.

    Vince Vaughn: Mr. Vaughn said his career and extracurricular choices were not reflections of a political stance. “I am truly more of an independent that anything,” he said. “I don’t agree 100 percent with either side on everything.”

    David Spade: Gave $2000 to the Kerry campaign, and none to any conservative campaign. Pretty odd for a “conservative comedian”, as you have made him out to be.

    Drew Carey: The only presidential campaign Carey has contributed to is Ron Paul. Most would not classify Ron Paul supporters as classically conservative.

    Kelsey Grammer: Not a comedian. Says he is a Republican but has also contributed to Democratic campaigns. Certainly not a commentator on conservative thought.

    Bob Hope: Not who many might think he was. “I left England at the age of 4 after my father’s dreams were crushed by the cruel machinery of capitalist enterprise.” In 1981, incensed by the election of Ronald Reagan, whom he called a “false friend,” Bob moved to Nicaragua, where he opened the first in a series of “revolutionary golf orphanages.” He declined six honorary doctorates “until American universities stop engaging in weapons research.” “My favorite subject was ancient history,” he says. “Of course, when I went to school it was all about white males, which just goes to show you that history is written by the victors.” He sent a Native American to receive his Presidential Medal of Freedom, which the Native American declined.

    Jim Belushi: Who cares. He’s not funny and owes his career to his late brother.

    Bruce Willis: Told The New York Daily News: “I’m always being accused of being a Hollywood Republican — but I’m not! I have just as many Democratic ideas as Republican ones,” he insisted. “If they could build three fewer bombs every month and give the money to foster care, that would be great.” Also, action hero and not intentionally funny.

    Jimmy Stewart: Very conservative by most counts, but I wonder what he would have thought of W if he had lived to see his era.

    Norm McDonald: Who cares. Canadian, and not exactly the brightest bulb in the pack. His shtick is certainly not political humor, even when he is palling around with Dennis Miller. Oh, and you forgot Victoria Jackson who is no longer intentionally funny, if she ever was. I think she proves our point more than yours.

    Kurt Russell: Libertarian, and not a comedian. Action hero.

    Alice Cooper: Not a comedian, and not even unintentionally funny. Just sad. You really want this guy on your side? Ok, he’s all yours.

    James Woods: Not even remotely funny, but yes, conservative. “The only solution to Osama bin Laden is a fucking 88-millimeter shell through his forehead.” Is this what passes for humor in your camp? Touche.

    Denzel Washington: Gave over $30,000 to the Obama campaign and stood with him at the inauguration. That’s conservative!

    Dennis Hopper: Not funny, unless you think roles portraying nitris-addicted serial killers is funny. The only Republican campaign he’s contributed to is his own, and he voted for Obama, supposedly because of Sarah Palin.

    Gary Oldman: Great actor but not funny. British.

    Sarah Michelle Gellar: Not funny. Won’t discuss politics. She sighs. “It’s really hard when you are an actor, because people listen to you because you are an actor — not because you are qualified to speak about anything in particular. “It worries me that people will pick a political candidate — or even a proposition — based on their like or dislike of an actor. People need to vote in an educated manner, not because your favourite movie star says so. “So, I will not speak about candidates or issues. Aside from saying I am pro stem-cell research.”

    Heather Locklear: Who cares? Not funny, nor noted for her intelligence, but you can have her on your team if you like. Are we going to add Britney Spears, Tori Spelling and Lindsay Lohan too? You’re not good at trying to prove intelligence and wit are on your side, are you?

    John Malkovich: Not affiliated with a political party at all. “This is what politics is to me: Somebody tells you all the trees on your street have a disease. One side says give them food and water and everything will be fine. One side says chop them down and burn them so they don’t infect another street. That’s politics. And I’m going, Who says they’re diseased? And how does this sickness manifest itself? And is this outside of a natural cycle? And who said this again? And when were they on the street? But we just have people who shout, “Chop it down and burn it” or “Give it food and water,” and there’s your two choices. Sorry, I’m not a believer.”

    Ted Nugent: Ok, you got me, this guy can be on your team, and he is funny: very, and very unintentionally.

    Clint Eastwood: Describes himself as a Libertarian, actually, and is no comedian. Can you even name one of his pictures that was intentionally a comedy? Also, action hero, traditionally. He says his philosophy is “Everyone leaves everyone else alone” so, though he’s got the weapons, I don’t see him gunning for liberals.

    J.C. Van Damme / Chuck Norris: Not intentionally funny, and reaffirm the stereotype of action hero Republicanism. What point were you trying to make again?

    Dana Carvey: Bwahahahahahaha! Have you ever seen this guy’s standup? (Especially his impressions of either bush, whom no one nails better.) Very funny, but conservative? Not by any stretch.

    Jeff Foxworthy: Ok, you could have simplified this post with this one name, because he’s the only conservative comedian you’ve got, and arguably no longer funny at all. “You might be a redneck if…” -you put the above bumper sticker on your car, Jeff.

    Here, I’ll give you a few for free, since you can’t seem to find but one actual conservative comedian: Larry The Cable Guy (total hack) and Brad Stine. Again, arguably not necessarily funny, but at least they are conservative comedians. Happy hunting!

  125. 160 Failix: “Dude, Christopher Hitchens is an ex-Trotskyist, anti-theist, atheist, and constantly refuses to associate himself with conservatives and conservative ideology.”

    Yes, but I meant besides all that! Okay, he hates Michael Moore, remains a supporter of Bush’s war, is friends with Paul Wolfowitz and drinks like a Republican who, on the whole, drink like Ted Kennedy.

  126. @ #169 POSTED BY PHIKUS

    That list was bullshit.

    Thanks for lobbing those grenades right back at ’em. Even if they were mostly duds in the first place.

    It’ll never cease to amaze me how desperate conservatives get and how they’ll try to throw out horseshit lists and “facts” like these in hopes that we’ll be moronic enough to take them at face value… these same horseshit list and “facts” that are easily refuted if you bother to take a closer look (as you just did).

    They waste so much of our time with these trite tactics. But, if we don’t call these liars out… no one will.

    I remember at the height of the WMD fiasco, they did a study and found that many avid FOX News viewers thought we already found them. How’d FOX pull that off? By constantly throwing out “stories” that’d scream, “we’d found ’em!, we’d found ’em!” and then very quietly “correcting” it later.

    lies lies lies lies lies lies lies truth lies lies lies…

  127. @ #58:

    Actually, I thought it was a wonderful thing. I think we might all be a little better off if we were more capable of finding wonder in our world. I thought the clown faces were wonderful because of the technique; it represented something that I can’t do. I thought it was wonderful because of its artistic statement, which to me is a reminder of not only the occasional foolishness of our leaders, but also because it humanized them for it. I would have thought it was wonderful if Democratic leaders had been similarly painted. I think that politics represents (or should) the fruition of our social contract with one another; it’s how we agree to do things and get them done. So. The premise of the site is as a directory of wonderful things, and I think BoingBoing fills that mission admirably. It has never promised to be anything else; if you don’t like what you encounter here, then skip that post. If you start not liking a majority of the posts, then it may be time to find (or create) something else.


    The Washington Monument glistening in the sun is a nice touch.

  129. Phikus, that’s an excellent summary of the list given. Thanks for going through the effort.

  130. Joshuaz: Glad I had the time. Such complete BS should not go un-refuted. Thanks for your helpful debunking too.

    Jerkzilla: Pure win!

  131. Liberalism, what exactly does it mean these days?

    Before “liberal” became a loaded codeword, it stood for a political philosophy that favored individual rights, freedom and the rule of law over the rule of men.

    If anything else, we should be most disturbed over this semantic shift redefining a core American value, the very foundation of this Democracy, no resemblance of the Founders intention.

  132. Watch out- gun totin’ liberals will return fire.

    I believe the Radical “right” is going too far, and I sincerely hope America has enough brains to push away extremism from ANY side.

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