Mary Carillo's Badminton Rant: Athens 2004

Mary Carillo knows how to fill up some dead time on TV.

This was taken off the air from a badminton broadcast in the middle of the night, US time. What starts as a normal description about the equipment turns into a full-on rant about how backyard badminton is *really* played.
Mary Carillo's Badminton Rant: Athens 2004


  1. Weird? No way, she is great! It is incredibly harder to improvise solo than with partners and this is some of the best I ever heard, ever! Completely surrealist, inventive and yet it has internal coherence, method to its madness if you will, all of that with the straightest face… superb.

  2. All I know is that I stopped watching the Olympics altogether when they filled the broadcast airwaves with Badminton while killing wrestling – an actual Olympic sport, as in they played it in ancient Greece.

    Yes, I know wrestling bores most of you (at least if you are straight and male), but badminton? Really?

  3. At home, we first threw our rackets up at the birdie, and when the rackets got stuck in the tree, we used a long stick. Eventually we just started keeping the stick nearby.

  4. That’s the sort of clip that makes a person’s career- I just hope she’s gotten plenty of opportunities since to rant, and wasn’t reprimanded for going off script like that.

  5. Come on, kids, this was inspired. It started kind of gently, in the abstract, and became progressively more detailed, personal and strangely bitter, but it ended perfectly.

    I can almost imagine the producer, suddenly and painfully aware of time to fill, turning his right hand over and over in the universal sign of “keep talking” while pointing to the countdown clock with his left hand, and Mary has to come up with something fast. Again, inspired. Especially when she refers to neighborhood kids by name and the “duck rescue incident”.

    Backyard badminton FTW.

    1. Completely agree, I have yet to hear such a rant as immersive or detailed as hers. It has the right amount of raalism and distorted reality to make it entertaining.

      This woman is a pro fo sho

  6. Hey, Mary,
    Given a sufficient quantity of black powder, and an appropriately-sized chunk of PVC pipe, I’ll bet you $100 that I can make even the crappiest of birdies exceed 200mph.

    Also, is it just me, or does she seem to grit her teeth or clench her jaw a lot?

  7. “…and later this evening, we will broadcast recent footage of Vice President Johnson’s tour of Vietnam”

  8. scripted? I mean it’s possible she wrote that up the night before and had them put it in the prompter which would make it even stranger.

    1. Snap, Jaques. I was very surprised to not see the name Sue Sylvester before your comment. This is the prototype performance, and IMO, way better! Even her voice is perfect. And that helmet hair! What’s not to like?

  9. I know it didn’t make air in the States but imagine being awake in the middle of the night, not able to sleep, figuring to watch any of the olympics to keep you company and instead you’re treated to this. There is no way you’re going back to sleep now. That was inspired. And completely random. A gem for insomniacs.

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