Gilbert Gottfried reads erotic best-seller "Fifty Shades of Grey"

Were I anatomically capable of having a boner, Gilbert Gottfried's reading of the best-selling erotic novel Fifty Shades of Grey would kill it dead. Forever. (



  1. Grampa Simpson: Unsatisfying sex life? 
    Homer: N — yes. But please, don’t you say that word! 
    Grampa Simpson: What, seeex? What’s so unappealing about hearing your elderly father talk about sex? I had seeeeex. 

    ALSO from Abe Simpson:
    Dear Advertisers,
    I am disgusted with the way old people are depicted on television. We are not all vibrant, fun-loving, sex-maniacs. Many of us are bitter, resentful individuals who remember the good old days when entertainment was bland and inoffensive. The following is a list of words I never want to hear on television again: 1. Bra; 2. Horny; 3. Family Jewels

  2. It took me quite a long time to ‘get’ Gilbert Gottfried. He is a master. Possibly in more ways than one…..

  3. Not sure I should make mention of anatomical changes experienced by women when aroused, lots of blood go places, it’s just not as obvious as in a guy. 

  4. Gilbert Gottfried is indeed a master of cock blocking. You laugh too hard to even think about sex.

  5. This is the internet… Rule 34 THERE IS SOMEONE THAT IS TURNED ON BY THIS! There was probably a usenet group for it back in the day

  6. Seems like as good a reason as any to resurrect the Lysol douche.  Just have to figure out which orifice to administer it through.

  7. I would love the full version of this by GG.  I certainly can’t keep a straight face now the next time I see some woman reading this on the plane (amazingly common recently for me).

  8. Fun fact: Gilbert Gottfried was part of the cast during the disastrous 1980 season of Saturday  Night Live (actually, the same cast that introduced Eddie Murphy as well as Joe Piscopo), but apparently got very few appearances in sketches, which he may have been grateful for in the long run.

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