Gettin' Higgy With it: A Roundup of Higgs Boson Jokes on Twitter

Big science news today: Scientists at Europe's CERN research center have discovered a new subatomic particle believed to be a basic building block of the universe, which appears to be the "boson" imagined and named half a century ago by theoretical physicist Peter Higgs. And Stephen Hawking loses a $100 bet. Many of us on Twitter know that we should be excited by all of this, but have no idea what it really means, having dope-smoked our way through Physics class in high school. This animation helps. Still: If you can't join 'em, LOL at 'em. Here are some of the better #higgsjokes I faved on Twitter after the news broke. Did I miss any good ones? Let me know in the comments. And read Maggie's post.


    1. I hate irony like that, but I love the fact that you’re focusing on that instead of attacking the messenger (Tyson) like so many embarrassing Americans are doing right now in “response” to his tweet.

  1. The Large Hadron Collider actually opened a window into a parallel universe, in which Magnum, P.I. was real instead of a TV show. (Stay with me on this.) In that universe, Jonathan Higgins actually served in the British Royal Navy instead of the Royal Air Force. While in the Royal Navy, Jonathan served as the foreman of a deck crew. In essence, the Hadron Collider discovered … the Bosun Higgins.

  2. So.. If I cant find my keys, I just need a Hadron colider?
    Somebody must have had a Higgsup!
    How do you play a Higgs boson – like a tuba?
    What do you think of Higgs boson? – Nothing in particular!

  3. Slightly off topic: Why is boson in quotes? If anything, “discovered” should be in quotes ;)

  4. Actually, what they meant to say is that they found the freakin’ bassoon Higg’s lost that one time…  at band camp.  

  5. @neiltyson  On the day we reserve to tell ourselves America is great – July 4 – Europe reminds us that we suck at science.

    For values of “Europe” that include “$455 million invested in the CMS detector by the United States and over 500 collaborating scientists from the U.S.”

    1. Sigh…  [clap, clap, clap, clap]

      Congrats… you’re that guy here on Boing Boing of all places…

      I just read your post right after I already made mine below, care to read?

      by the United States and over 500 collaborating scientists from the U.S.”

      Yes, but how many of those scientists were born and educated outside of the USA?

      U.S. based research institutions are becoming less and less populated with their own citizens because of our shitty educational system. So while we can certainly beat our chests about it, we SHOULDN’T.

      FACT: Foreign-born and educated researchers are now disproportionately influential in US science.
      FACT: More than half of the PhD students in the United States’ physical sciences are from outside the US.
      FACT: Over 64% of the “USA’s” most-cited authors & 56% of the citation classics are from foreign-born researchers.

      1. Cowicide,  the state of U.S. science may be debated by reasonable people mustering reasonable evidence. 

        Nevertheless, I contend that given the very large involvement of U.S. scientists in the LHC’s experiments, the Higgs announcement is remarkably poor evidence “that we suck at science.”

        (I cannot resist adding….
        FACT: every one of those 455 million dollars was born in the United States.)

        1. FACT: every one of those 455 million dollars was born in the United States.

          MUCH MORE SOBERING FACT: The LHC was 7.5 billion euros.

          455 million U.S. dollars ain’t shit compared, buddy.

  6. On the day we reserve to tell ourselves America is great – July 4 – Europe reminds us that we suck at science. #HiggsBoson

    Some dimwits on reddit hyperventilated upon reading Tyson’s tweet and proceeded to espouse the wonders of American scientific progress and how wrong, wrong, wrong Tyson was to tweet something so wrong, wrong, wrong.

    Oh, the irony of watching people trying to show how smart Americans are while doing so in ignorance… So I tried, tried, tried to show them the context:

    That shows in graphic detail how Tyson is right, right, right.

    It’s an amazing bit of gymnastics for some Americans to be able to beat their chests while simultaneously shoving their heads in the sand.  No wonder we’re getting further and further behind.

    Is it really patriotic to ignore American problems and do NOTHING about it?  NOPE, it’s not.

  7. sorry, no joke here, but the part of that animation where he said that they need more and more energy to keep discovering new particles just makes me think that we’ll never find the fundamental particle until we eventually use all the available energy in the universe, creating another big bang and starting the whole thing all over again.

    1. No, I think with the Higgs announcement, we’re close to seeing some of the *why* of particle-particle interactions.  With the standard model as a good launching point, we can start to see why some particles pick up different amounts of mass from the Higgs field, and others different amounts.  There’s something about those particles, or there are as yet unseen intercessors that mediate the products.  It’s all very interesting.

  8. Late to the party on this thread, but this was my July 4 cartoon:

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