Gettin' Higgy With it: A Roundup of Higgs Boson Jokes on Twitter

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30 Responses to “Gettin' Higgy With it: A Roundup of Higgs Boson Jokes on Twitter”

  1. My says:

    Search 
    https://twitter.com/#!/afrakt for Higgs. You’ll find a bunch more.

  2. darrrrrrn says:

    Lucky we found the ‪#Higgs‬ or else we’d have collided all those hard-ons together for nothing.

    https://twitter.com/darren_cullen/status/220590957907816448

  3. markjamesmurphy says:

     https://twitter.com/markjamesmurphy/status/220267157970362369

  4. shutz says:

    “Did you hear?  They found the Higgs Boson!”
    “Heavy.”

  5. nox says:

    Ironically the US was at the forefront of this 20 years ago, but then they started failing at science.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Superconducting_Super_Collider 

    • Cowicide says:

      I hate irony like that, but I love the fact that you’re focusing on that instead of attacking the messenger (Tyson) like so many embarrassing Americans are doing right now in “response” to his tweet.

  6. Andrew S. says:

    Team operating the LHC – 1  Team operating the Super Monkey Collider – 0. 

  7. BDiamond says:

    The Large Hadron Collider actually opened a window into a parallel universe, in which Magnum, P.I. was real instead of a TV show. (Stay with me on this.) In that universe, Jonathan Higgins actually served in the British Royal Navy instead of the Royal Air Force. While in the Royal Navy, Jonathan served as the foreman of a deck crew. In essence, the Hadron Collider discovered … the Bosun Higgins.

  8. I now believe the God particle is inside of me. @schuldercnn Or there’s the one about the physicist searching for Higgs at night under a lamp post here – http://schoolsofthought.blogs.cnn.com/2011/12/19/searching-for-news-that-matters/

  9. Olav Cleemann says:

    So.. If I cant find my keys, I just need a Hadron colider?
    Somebody must have had a Higgsup!
    How do you play a Higgs boson – like a tuba?
    What do you think of Higgs boson? – Nothing in particular!

  10. Albert says:

    This one was my favorite

    At the end of the ‪#higgs‬ announcement, one of the CERN team will pause, nonchalantly say “oh, one more thing”, then calmly teleport away.

    https://twitter.com/tomscott/status/220429625816383489

  11. AnthonyC says:

    Slightly off topic: Why is boson in quotes? If anything, “discovered” should be in quotes ;)

  12. Noodlehead says:

    Actually, what they meant to say is that they found the freakin’ bassoon Higg’s lost that one time…  at band camp.  

  13. Richard Dagenais says:

    Newsflash: Apple sues CERN. “We patented Higgs Boson already.”

  14. Adam Fields says:

    “The LHC team will also be announcing yesterday that they’ve discovered tachyons.”
    https://twitter.com/fields/status/220205489173176320

  15. Bill Higgins-- Beam Jockey says:

    @neiltyson  On the day we reserve to tell ourselves America is great – July 4 – Europe reminds us that we suck at science.

    For values of “Europe” that include “$455 million invested in the CMS detector by the United States and over 500 collaborating scientists from the U.S.”

    • Cowicide says:

      Sigh…  [clap, clap, clap, clap]

      Congrats… you’re that guy here on Boing Boing of all places…

      I just read your post right after I already made mine below, care to read?

      by the United States and over 500 collaborating scientists from the U.S.”

      Yes, but how many of those scientists were born and educated outside of the USA?

      U.S. based research institutions are becoming less and less populated with their own citizens because of our shitty educational system. So while we can certainly beat our chests about it, we SHOULDN’T.

      FACT: Foreign-born and educated researchers are now disproportionately influential in US science.
      FACT: More than half of the PhD students in the United States’ physical sciences are from outside the US.
      FACT: Over 64% of the “USA’s” most-cited authors & 56% of the citation classics are from foreign-born researchers.

      • Bill Higgins-- Beam Jockey says:

        Cowicide,  the state of U.S. science may be debated by reasonable people mustering reasonable evidence. 

        Nevertheless, I contend that given the very large involvement of U.S. scientists in the LHC’s experiments, the Higgs announcement is remarkably poor evidence “that we suck at science.”

        (I cannot resist adding….
        FACT: every one of those 455 million dollars was born in the United States.)

        • Cowicide says:

          FACT: every one of those 455 million dollars was born in the United States.

          MUCH MORE SOBERING FACT: The LHC was 7.5 billion euros.

          455 million U.S. dollars ain’t shit compared, buddy.

  16. Cowicide says:

    On the day we reserve to tell ourselves America is great – July 4 – Europe reminds us that we suck at science. #HiggsBoson

    Some dimwits on reddit hyperventilated upon reading Tyson’s tweet and proceeded to espouse the wonders of American scientific progress and how wrong, wrong, wrong Tyson was to tweet something so wrong, wrong, wrong.

    Oh, the irony of watching people trying to show how smart Americans are while doing so in ignorance… So I tried, tried, tried to show them the context:

    http://io9.com/5878503/watch-neil-degrasse-tyson-lay-bare-the-decline-of-american-science-in-180-seconds

    That shows in graphic detail how Tyson is right, right, right.

    It’s an amazing bit of gymnastics for some Americans to be able to beat their chests while simultaneously shoving their heads in the sand.  No wonder we’re getting further and further behind.

    Is it really patriotic to ignore American problems and do NOTHING about it?  NOPE, it’s not.

  17. autark says:

    sorry, no joke here, but the part of that animation where he said that they need more and more energy to keep discovering new particles just makes me think that we’ll never find the fundamental particle until we eventually use all the available energy in the universe, creating another big bang and starting the whole thing all over again.

    • awjt says:

      No, I think with the Higgs announcement, we’re close to seeing some of the *why* of particle-particle interactions.  With the standard model as a good launching point, we can start to see why some particles pick up different amounts of mass from the Higgs field, and others different amounts.  There’s something about those particles, or there are as yet unseen intercessors that mediate the products.  It’s all very interesting.

  18. I like mine better: “I’ll believe they found the Higgs Boson when I see it.”

  19. Late to the party on this thread, but this was my July 4 cartoon: http://www.robcottingham.ca/cartoon/archive/do-you-still-want-to-see-this-odd-particle-ive-found/

  20. mmrtnt says:

    Here’s my contribution to particle physics  

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