Doktor A's immortality helmet

Doktor A's beautiful immortality helmet was produced on commission and looks like a spectacular way to extend your lifespan:

1. Remove strap and leads from the storage drawer.
2. Place electrodes against forehead and tighten strap.
3. Attach bulldog clips to terminals in the jaw.
4. Set over-ride timer to desired duration.
5. Crank the main handle to build electrical charge.
6. Close the main switch to engage the electrical flow.
7. Increase the electrical voltage using dial.
8. Wait until your Asphyx manifests within the tube.
9. Shut off charge to electrodes using the main switch.
10. Transfer the Asphyx to a long term containment device.
11. Congratulations you have gained immortality.

Congratulations you have gained immortality. (via Super Punch)


  1. I regret to say that all I got from the device was a piercing headache and a renewed subscription to AOL that I had gone to such pains to remove in the first place, and the remedy in the instructions (“please wait at least one century to see if it works before returning for a refund) is inadequate, as the warranty only lasts 90 days. 

  2. Now there’s a lost classic that always gets overlooked: The Asphyx.

    You can forget most other cheesy/Hammer horror films of the 70s, this is the one that should get all the plaudits.

    IMHO of course.

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