In a recently-published paper in the academic journal Antiquity, a group of researchers from Istanbul University led by Eylem Özdoğan claim to have unearthed a piece of ancient art containing the oldest-known narrative scene:
A wall relief, comprising five figures carved on a bench in a communal building dating to the ninth millennium BC, was found in south-eastern Turkey in 2021. It constitutes the earliest known depiction of a narrative 'scene', and reflects the complex relationship between humans, the natural world and the animal life that surrounded them during the transition to a sedentary lifestyle.
Sounds neat, right? There's all kinds of important cultural and historical context in the paper. But what really matters is this description of the art:
The human appears to be male, with a phallus-shaped extension on the abdomen, and is shown in a slightly squatted position, with its back turned to the first three figures. Its raised, open left hand has six fingers, while the right holds a snake, or a rattle, with its head facing the ground. Although the body of the bull is portrayed from the side, its head is depicted as if from above, with both horns visible. This distorted perspective is comparable to that seen at other prehistoric sites and must have been deliberately chosen to emphasise the horns, which are exaggerated like the leopards' teeth in the previous scene.
There you have it, folks: the oldest known narrative art in the world is furry porn.
The Sayburç reliefs: a narrative scene from the Neolithic [Eylem Özdoğan / Antiquity]
11,000-Year-Old Carving of Man Holding His Penis, Surrounded by Leopards, Is Oldest-Known Depiction of a Narrative Scene [Jesse Holth / ARTnews]
