Donald Trump is is now peddling bibles at $60 a pop, and if any of his devout MAGA followers ask him what the book is about, he will explain in his own words, "There are so many brilliant things in the bible."
As he did in the hilarious montage posted on X today, in which, throughout the years, the devout conman has offered his many insights into what one might find in the bible. (See video below, posted by Ron Filipkowski.)
"There are so many things you can learn from it. The proverb, 'never bend to envy,' I've had that thing all of my life, where people are bending to envy, and actually, it's an incredible book," he told one interviewer.
But if asked by one of his customers what one or two of his favorite bible verses are, they won't get an answer from the bashful huckster. "I wouldn't want to get into it, because for me, that's very personal," he told another reporter. "You know, when I talk about the bible, it's very personal, so I don't want to get into it," he repeated. "The bible means a lot to me, but I don't want to get into specifics."
He also won't reveal which he prefers, the Old Testament or the New Testament, coyly responding, "Probablyyyy … equal."
And when asked what important lesson he has learned from the bible, the merch man was able to come up with one example: "An eye for an eye."
Finally, when all else fails (as in trying to answer a question about an ol' book he knows nothing about), Trump can always rely on his fallback response: "I really can't hear with this earphone, by the way."
If, after watching the montage, anyone questions how the former reality game show host could possibly be selling a book he has obviously never read, just remember, he was able to pose as a U.S. president and commander-in-chief without a shred of political or military knowledge. Why not also pose as a pious Bible Salesman and make some extra cash while he's at it?
