Atlantic reporter Saahil Desai decided to cruise around our nation's capital by piloting Elon Musk's geometric nightmare truck around town just to see what would happen.
He says he managed to rack up 17 middle fingers, countless "motherf*****s" (en español también!), and one delightful woman who hoped his ridiculous vehicle would get blown to smithereens.
Excerpt:
Earlier that day, my first stop was the heart of the resistance: the Dupont Circle farmers' market. The people there wanted to see the organic asparagus and lion's-mane mushrooms. What they did not want to see was a stainless-steel, supposedly bulletproof Cybertruck. Every red light created new moments for mockery. "You fucker!" yelled a bicyclist as he pedaled past me on P Street. The diners eating brunch on the sidewalk nearby laughed and cheered. Then came the next stoplight: A woman eating outside at Le Pain Quotidien gave me the middle finger for a solid 20 seconds, all without interrupting her conversation.
The FBI, run by Krazy Eyes Kash Patel — has created a special task force to investigate Tesla vandalism as "domestic terrorism." Meanwhile, the usual right-wing circus performers — Kid Rock, Alex Jones, and Kanye — are collecting these rolling MAGA hat like Pokémon cards.
Desai concluded, "for most people, the car just isn't worth driving."
Previously:
• The Tesla 'Cyberbeast' is exceptionally ugly
• A first-hand account of how bad the Cybertruck is
• Decorative magnets corrode Cybertruck panels
