Tom Colella worked for 20 years as an Instrument Electrical Tradesperson for Aroona Alliance in Western Australia, until he was fired in on Sept 20, 2016 for sneaking off to play golf every Wednesday afternoon and hiding his absences from his employer by putting the PDA that he was obliged to carry -- in order to track his movements -- in a mylar potato-chip bag that acted as a Faraday cage and prevented it from receiving GPS signals and other location-identifying beacons and storing or communicating his location for his employer. Read the rest

Carbohydrate whisperer Jessica Leigh Clark-Bojin (AKA @thePieous) (previously), author of Pies Are Awesome Vol 1 "Pie-Modding": How to Epic-Up Store Bought Pies and Be the Hero of the Party" writes "I've come up with a way of making hand pies in silicone molds that solves the big problems associated with making pies this way - primarily lack of control over the finish and texture. I make a double layer of dough with egg in between the layers, then do a partial bake in the mold juuuuuust long enough for it to retain its shape outside, and then add a very thin layer of extra decorations and complete the bake." Read the rest

Redditor Endeavy created these Halloween-themed skull hotpockets, augmented by dribbles of red, oozing sauce; they used these cake pans to mold the crusts. Read the rest

Ever since I read Michael Pollan's advice to avoid any food whose packaging makes any nutritional claims, I've been a happy man -- but never so much so as I realize that this rule means I would never fall prey to the latest shitty scam from the Quaker oats people. Read the rest

Carbohydrate whisperer Jessica Leigh Clark-Bojin (AKA @thePieous) (previously), author of Pies Are Awesome Vol 1 "Pie-Modding": How to Epic-Up Store Bought Pies and Be the Hero of the Party" writes, "I Mucha'd up Eleven with waffles. In pie form. As ya do. I'm incredibly psyched for season 2 - Stranger Things is everything I love in pop culture wadded up, thrown in a blender, and poured out all over my TV set. But, you know, sophisticatedly. " Read the rest

It's Black Friday mixes us a DIY Black Frappucino, which is a blend of bottled sugary "latte," ice, black gel food dye and activated charcoal (warning, don't use this if you're on any kind of important meds, eg birth control, mood stabilizers, chemo drugs, etc). It looks pretty great, even if it's a giant calorie whose key ingredients are terrible "coffee" and a food additive that can lead to accidental pregnancies. (via The Everyday Goth) Read the rest

Thinkgeek's $30 Critical Hit Waffle Maker produces D20 carbohydrates on demand, which makes it the best breakfast roll going. Read the rest

Pie-hacking baker Jessica Leigh Clark-Bojin (AKA @thePieous) (previously), author of Pies Are Awesome Vol 1 "Pie-Modding": How to Epic-Up Store Bought Pies and Be the Hero of the Party, has been dabbling with "Piescrapers", "pie that are built 'up' using a series of engineering and baking tricks to enhance structural integrity and make tall pies stable, and delicious!" Read the rest

Redditor Pirate_Redbeard posted this video of an ice-cream robot vending machine in Japan: an anthropomorphic robot that plucks a cone, holds it under a soft-serve machine, pulls a perfect poop-emoji swirl, passes it through a one-way bank-teller window, and then does a dance of delight once you pluck it up. Read the rest

Dave and Buster's will sell you a 1,970 calorie appetizer (the "Carnivore Pizzadilla"); Texas Roadhouse adds marshmallows and caramel sauce to the sweet potato in its "16-oz. Prime Rib with Loaded Sweet Potato" to bring a single meal up to 2,820 calories, and The Cheesecake Factory's "Flying Gorilla" cocktail crams 950 calories into a single beverage, making it calorically equal to a Big Mac and fries. Read the rest

Writing in his official capacity, Archbishop Secretary Arthur Roche has published a letter detailing the Vatican's position on gluten-free Eucharist. Read the rest

Vintage Confections' $19 Creature Eyeball lollipop assortments come in an assortment of six flavors ("Blackberry, Marshmallow, Cotton candy, Green apple, Strawberry, Guava") and an assortment of creepy eyeball designs. (via Crazy Abalone) Read the rest

Ever wish the anonymous jerks who comments on your online life would be made to eat their words? Wish no more, Trollcakes is here. Read the rest

Popeyes is now serving a limited-time "Sweet and Tender" chicken dish that involves dredging nuggets of chicken slurry in shortbread-cookie dust, then serving it with high-fructose corn syrup jam. Read the rest

The campaign to raise $500K for the UN High Commission on Refugees started with author/comedian Sara Benincasa daring Neil Gaiman to do a dramatic reading of the Cheesecake Factory menu; Gaiman responded that if she raised the half-mil, he'd not only read the Cheesecake Factory's (notoriously florid) menu, he'd follow up with a reading of Dr Seuss's Fox in Socks if the funds hit $1m (I hasten to point out that this activity involves some risk to Gaiman, given the Seuss estate's penchant for bullying acts of copyfraud). Read the rest

Fruit is good for you; fruit-juice is mostly sugar and water, and what's more, getting your calories from liquids does not invoke your satiety response meaning that you stay hungry even after consuming crazy amounts of calories. Read the rest

@matttomic's Sandwich Alignment Chart isn't just an amusing and thought-provoking taxonomy of sandwiches (though it certainly is that!). Read the rest