Space Hijackers create Official Protesters programme for the London 2012 Olympics

Leah sez,

Bespoke troublemakers, the Space Hijackers, have announced that they are the Official Protesters of the London 2012 Olympic Games. To this end, they've launched a site where you can register for tickets for the official protests. They have also outlined the top ten reasons why the Olympics are worth protesting against.

A spokesperson said "accept no imitation, we are the Official Protesters. We shall be taking steps to ensure no unauthorised protest occurs around the London 2012 Olympic Games".

The Space Hijackers stress that LOCOG, the IoC and the ODA should expect protest wherever Olympic legislation and regulation is applicable and enforced. An international network of Olympic protesters have partnered under the Protest London 2012 umbrella and are planning as invasive a campaign as the Olympic Games themselves. However, only those groups authorised by the Official Protesters of the London 2012 Olympic Games will be allowed to express dissent.

Disclaimer: "Official Protesters", "Official Protester", "Official Protest", "Protest", "The Space Hijackers", "Space Hijackers", "Spacehijackers", "Space", "Hijacker" and "Hijackers" are protected under trademark and copyright. Unauthorised use without express written consent from the Official Protesters of the London 2012 Olympic Games.

Some background: as part of its campaign to win the games, the UK promised the International Olympic Committee that it would extend extraordinary privileges to it and its corporate partners. It's a criminal offense to use "London" and "2012" or "2012" and "Games" in a commercial context without authorisation. Yes, criminal: you can go to gaol for putting up a pub signboard that says "Watch the Olympic Games here today!" Parliament's Olympic lickspittles also delivered a law that gives the cops the power to enter your private home and remove anti-Olympics posters. And there are 10,000 private security guards on-site who insist that you're not allowed to stand on public land and take pictures, despite assurances from the government and police that they've been trained and briefed.

Here's an earlier Space Hijackers action: "Life Neutral" certification for arms dealers.

Official Protests for the London 2012 Olympics (Thanks, Leah!)

• [tosh]

  ugh… as if it wasn’t going to be a pain living in hackney during the olympics anyway, without these bell ends protesting about ridiculous rules made by other bell ends in government, that are relevant for 4 weeks. JOY

  • [The Ethnic Hipster]

    You’re totally right. Because ridiculous, freedom-abolishing laws should be accepted without question and meekness.

    • [tosh]

      “oh no it’s the fuzz, take down the anti-olympic posters or it’s the slammer for us boys”.  i’m more worried them bolting missiles to the top of flats down the road. 

  • [Nathan Hornby]

    The more ridiculous the rules, the more ridiculous the protest.

    For what it’s worth these people are likely to have very little (if any) impact on your life.  Whereas the games?  An absurd impact.

    Get over yourself.

  • [Tim Drage]

    are you sure you don’t live in South Park not Hackney?
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Argument_to_moderation

• [lutzray]

  what? no Olympic rings on the T-shirt?

  • [lutzray]

    Oups… I see them now (‘surfing on a Touch…)

• [Max]

  I can’t help wondering if other countries that were in the running for this olympic hosting had their bid teams visited by bankers saying “look lads, we’ve dropped a bollock. Try not to commit to much spending for the next 5 years or so. Word to the wise eh.”

  • [Max]

    PS Note to Americans : Dropping a bollock is very much like “dropping the ball” only a lot more painful and embarrassing.

    • [Dan Hibiki]

       hey, give us some credit. we know what bollocks are… you tie ships to them, right?

• [Jim]

  Best protest of the Olympic Games is also the easiest one.  Ignore them.  The games thrive on attention, these protestors are just adding fuel to the Olympic fire.

  • [James ‘Jimbob’ Carter]

    Perhaps, then again, perhaps not.  A lot of the ridiculousness needs to have attention heaped upon it.  Much like the silly zil lanes, and the security guards.  Photography flash mob, anyone?

  • [Nathan Hornby]

    That would only be true if the purpose of the games were to be watched by the public. But the purpose of the games is quite obviously to rub shoulders with dignitaries and show off our military and policing capability.

    You ignoring them will go entirely unnoticed.  Getting in the way of their schmoozing, that’s what’ll get noticed.

    • [RJ]

       Get in the way, so they can show off their military and policing capability to the dignitaries.

      • [Dan Hibiki]

         pretty much. most of these protesters will be kettled away several blocks from anyone remotely important.

  • [ZikZak]

     The games thrive on attention of a certain kind.  They thrive on people paying attention to the celebrated players (excuse me, Olympians), the glossy competitions, and the lavish festivities.

    They do not thrive when people pay attention to the social and economic cost of the games, the civil liberties lost, the reality of a corporate takeover of a major world city.  Protest – especially disorderly protest – draws attention to these latter issues in a way that cannot be ignored.

• [floodmfx]

  They are protesting the corporate sponsorship of the olympics –
  by selling Tshirts and protest tickets?  that makes sense.

  • [Tim Drage]

    Yes, it does.

    • [Tim Drage]

      Tho it’s not clear whether they’re actually selling anything.

  • [Tim Drage]

    http://twitter.com/#!/spacehijackers/statuses/203498242145660928

    spacehijackers‏
    @felltir Shirts are not for sale. Only Official Protesters can legally Officially Protest. Have you registered? Are you Official?

    • [Antinous / Moderator]

      Are you local?

  • [Antinous / Moderator]

    They are protesting the corporate sponsorship of the olympics – by selling Tshirts and protest tickets?  that makes sense.

    If their tee-shirt sales were getting the government to create a special class of repressive laws to protect their interests, you might have a point there.

• [peterblue11]

  this isnt an onion article?? official protesters….idiots.

  • [dragonfrog]

    Whoooosh!

• [angusm]

  Doesn’t using the hideous official logo of the Olympics without authorization constitute some kind of capital offense under the Special Olympic Games Profit Before People Act of 2011? I thought that you couldn’t actually take a shit in the Greater London area right now without approval from the official sponsors of the Games, so using the Holy Logo ought to be sufficient to get you dragged off to the Tower.

• [Funk Daddy]

  The Olympics suck and Londoners are being screwed in so many ways it isn’t even funny.

  If you think these laws won’t return for a smaller event, then a smaller event, then a smaller event, until 2 people sharing a fag on the corner is unlawful assembly, you are wrong.

• [Wreckrob8]

  As a law abiding citizen I need to know where I can buy my official government sanctioned anti-protest protest sponsorship T-shirt NOW, please.

• [Rosin Ffield]

  The Fascist rulers in Germany, being psychopaths, were obsessed with mental inventory such as signs and runes (psychopaths obsess on mental inventory to histerical proportions).

  One such sign they obsessed on was their “sig”-rune, the the thing you see double on the SS logo.

  Now, if someone say “could you please come up with a logo that would carry the style of a “sig”-rune as well as the jerky, broken outlook of a swastika?” i’d think that this London Olympics “2012″ logo would be perfect answer to such question.

  Additionally this jerky “2012″ logo makes me think of something broken, exploded, destroyed… I really hope it is not a ”state it out in the open hidden in plain view before the event’” case for another false-flag staged terror incident…

  a nzi sig-rune for reference:
  http://i393.photobucket.com/albums/pp14/Inverted_Heptagram_Star/3445434.jpg

• [dragonfrog]

  Whoooosh!