Humorless Washingtonian thinks GOES211 plate is about penis-length, not Spinal Tap

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73 Responses to “Humorless Washingtonian thinks GOES211 plate is about penis-length, not Spinal Tap”

  1. AwesomeRobot says:

    “What exactly is it that you want to know? I find it disturbing that you can access my emails to the DOL.”

    Classic Dixon.

  2. Sirkowski says:

    The things people complain about…

  3. Jake0748 says:

    Johnson Dickson is not amused.

  4. rattypilgrim says:

    Um, his own surname must drive him crazy. Dixon/Dicks on….

  5. Scratcheee says:

    Mr. Dixon has crossed the fine line between clever and stupid.

  6. ImmutableMichael says:

    It’s such a fine line between stupid and clever.

  7. rocketpjs says:

    The key element of his comment is the plural form when referring to his emails.  Does he have a list of complaints and comments to the DOT?

  8. robuluz says:

    What’s wrong with being sexy?

  9. snagglepuss says:

    Well, we all know what’s on “little” Johnny’s mind, don’t we ?

  10. zmbabwe says:

    Two words: Shit sandwich. 

  11. feetleet says:

    In metric. 

  12. allenmcbride says:

    This story is funny, but it seems like you folks are being a little hard on Dixon. (Yeah, I know.) I’d consider complaining too if I thought someone’s plate was advertising the size of their erect penis. In a perfect world it should be fine; we’d all be happy that he was happy. But in a patriarchy, on a public road, it would seem a little intimidatory. Now how Dixon came to think GOES211 meant what he thought it meant is a whole other thing. But I wouldn’t want to be called humorless for that mistake.

    • winkybb says:

      Disagree. It is important to call people out the presumed right to “not be offended”. No such right exists.  Sure it is better if people act with sensitivity, but hiding behind a non-existent right is dangerous.

      In another trivial example, a while back a women’s national soccer team delayed a game at the ‘lympics by and hour-or-so because the wrong flag was shown by accident. They CHOSE to be offended by an honest mistake. Fortunately, because it was women’s soccer, no spectators were inconvenienced.

      • allenmcbride says:

        I agree; there should be no right to not be offended. And I support extreme freedom of expression in the public forum. And if I thought of the world of vanity license plates as part of the public forum, I wouldn’t dream of complaining over a my-boner’s-huge plate. But I see the vanity-plate world as a lesser forum, where other considerations may matter. Also, I think there’s a difference between offense and intimidation. Of course, it’s all pretty academic in this case, since no one was actually saying what Dixon thought they were.

        • I hope this is sarcasm.  

          Assuming the counter factual  would you actually be intimidated because some blow hard were to boast about the size of his schlong?  I would pull up next to him and start laughing.More importantly, inasmuch as vanity plates are expression, they are government mandated/endorsed expression, and we should be aggressively opposed to any kind of restriction or censorship  

          • edgore says:

            I thought that having a modest car instead of a huge SUV *was* a boast about the size of my penis…

          • allenmcbride says:

            No, I wouldn’t feel intimidated, but I think a rape victim might, and I think that’s something I can reasonably be concerned about despite not being a rape victim myself. I do see your point about the plates being government-issued. I would prefer to get rid of vanity plates completely rather than allow plates that were, for example, racist slurs. In fact, I think it might be nice to get rid of vanity plates anyway.

          • rattypilgrim says:

            Exactly. Anything you get past the censors at the DOL or DOV, good on you and I know some who got real messages across during the Bush Administration. That said, if I saw a racist or otherwise hate crimey kind of plate I would feel impelled to cal it out.

        • lavardera says:

          Conversely there is no right for us to feel pity for the poor fellow with a tiny boner driving the big truck.

      • Petzl says:

        Sorry, I gotta call BS here.

        [Disclaimer:  I get the joke and am an ardent Spinal Tap fan and would personally allow a GOES211 plate.]

        However, when you say “no such right to not be offended exists” you are wrong, in the context of how vanity license plates are allotted.

        DMV’s have been doing this for decades, rejecting or rescinding already issued plates, based on community standards.

        You may say (and I would agree) that it’s stupid and childish and shows a lack of worldliness and humor when they reject these plates. 

        But legally, they are on very firm ground when they reject these plates.

    • robuluz says:

      I guess where we disagree is on what might reasonably constitute a double entendre.

    • feetleet says:

      No, that was very upstanding of him. A firm, oaken stalwart, that one. A blue-blooded prince. When things get hairy, John fights for the little guy. You can’t forget your base – really, it’s the greatest measure of a man. Dixon’s stout, unbending salute to the middle-right makes me quiver. 

    • marilove says:

      Ooh, come on, I’ve never even seen spinal tap and I’m what you’d call a pretty feminist feminist and even *I* get the reference!

    • scav says:

      I’m not sure penis length is correlated with sexual violence, nor boasting about or indirectly referring to it. Not to the extent that you can call it intimidation in and of itself, when not directed at anyone in person. Not classy, but not ipso facto threatening.

      The mistake, for which Mr Dixon can be called worse things than humourless, is in thinking it was somehow his business to interpret a 7-character string (wrongly as it turns out) on somebody else’s car, take offence at his own interpretation, and demand that an authority figure intervene to make someone else’s expression suit his tastes and preferences.

      I can’t really bring myself to go easy on such a wanker, because his world view is antithetical to freedom of expression. I don’t even care if he has a sense of humour.

      • allenmcbride says:

        If it was a bumper sticker I’d agree. The difference with a license plate is crucial to why I’m defending Dixon. By allowing some vanity plates and not others, the state has already decided that social interests are relevant in what expression is allowed on those plates. Which is problematic. But I don’t think Dixon saying, “Dear DOL, I think this plate is on the wrong side of the line that you say you’ve drawn” implies that he doesn’t believe in free expression in the public forum.

        • scav says:

          A reasonable distinction. Though I think it’s not a distinction he himself was drawing, and his misplaced interference and indignation does him no credit.

  13. margaretpoa says:

    I guess that it’s not surprising that a man named after a penis…twice… would think that.

  14. fnc says:

    Sometimes a license plate is just a license plate.

  15. ldobe says:

    I remember a few years back the DOL got up in a brouhaha about Licensce plates containing “WTF” and “GTFO”.  IIRC, they simply banned all custom plates with “obscene acronyms” and issued new plates to those who’d already gotten them.

  16. Flashman says:

    However, the Washington DMV *did* turn down my request for SMELDAGLUV

  17. lavardera says:

    Whew, who turned Mr. Dickson up to 11?

  18. feetleet says:

    8==TLDR, DIXNJON, INCHCOP, JAZZODC, STCHBNS (STHUBNS), BONHENG, DST4VMT, SPONCOM, ISHARKI, 18INPI (as in, not 18′ π), SOCYJAK (SAUCYJQ), LUVPUMP, GDNXDNT, MIMEIS$, SMLGLUV, DILLOS, (PKTDILO), PNKTORP, NOBONES (NOBNES in Fla., FISHNUT), PKTGMBY, PKTZUKE (ZIPRZUK), FIRSTMO, L8STMPY, THMESMN, MACHNDM, 0MORBLK, SILORSN, IENVYUS, DCBYDRJ, HOGWOOD, CHAPEAU

    Help me out – what am I missing?

  19. We gained marriage equality and legalized recreational cannabis in our last election. One idiot at DOL still makes us light years ahead of the rest of the country,

    • GlyphGryph says:

       Actually, didn’t the DOL confirm his right to have the plate? All they did was look into a complain, as is their job, and decide it was baseless. I think that’s pretty good.

      Now, the hating on Juggalos… but that’s not really THEIR fault, if they have a policy against gang names. It’s the fault of whoever was stupid enough to call them a gang.

      • IronEdithKidd says:

        The FBI decided that Juggalos are a gang.  The FBI seems more interested in mission creep than honest assessment of either threats or subcultures.

  20. yadayada says:

    I’m thinking somebody’s penis only goes to 1.

    • sdmikev says:

      hahaha, exactly.
      also, all vanity plates are lame, and usually “worn” by people suffering from arrested development.

  21. SedanChair says:

    For a man to insinuate that his throbbing organ swells to a full 11″ in length is absolutely mouthwateriDISGUSTING

  22. The authorities said best leave it unsolved.

  23. tofagerl says:

    I find it incredibly offending that this man is going around thinking about dicks all the time! Can’t these gays keep it in the pants?

  24. peregrinus says:

    “GOES211″ – I’d have seen that as an outcry against Subway.

    “ELKNUT” on the other hand, took me a moment to be offended.  At first I thought it was the title of a book about a Norwegian wanderer in 1700s Spain.

  25. smotherbrother says:

    This reminds me of when I wore a shirt promoting the band Hole back in high school. Pretty simple design, just a silver heart with “Hole” spelled out inside it. Wore it for months.

    One morning, the gym teacher sends me home to change because of the “vulgarity” on my shirt. “Love hole” he told me it meant. I hadn’t heard the term before and haven’t heard anyone use it since. Yet, I’m the pervert.

    • peregrinus says:

      Oh but jeez you shoulda had the same design except with a donkey replacing the heart.  Oh but pleez that coulda happened!

  26. AnamDuine says:

    If Nigel Tufnel owned a Ferrari 458 (top speed 211 MPH) this plate would be perfect.

  27. Rev.Martin says:

    It’s a simple case of jealousy

  28. Tom Rombouts says:

    This might not be nearly as obscene as it seems. Perhaps he is from Europe and it goes to 11 centimeters.

    - TWR

  29. shawnblog says:

    At least it wasn’t Washington DC, where FREEDOM has been deemed unacceptable http://vanityplat.es/2012/05/30/freedom-unavailable/

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