As reported by ABC News, VP JD Vance is hosting a little emergency dinner soirée with top deplorables to figure out how to package a totally-not-suspicious sequence of events for public consumption:
1) An imprisoned sex trafficker gets nine hours with a Trump-appointed Deputy AG.
2) She tells him exactly what he wants to hear — that Donald Trump was an absolute saint during all those years she spent trafficking minors with Jeffrey Epstein.
3) A week later, she's whisked away to a cushier prison where the living's easy and the volleyball courts beckon.
This is the same Ghislaine Maxwell who federal prosecutors said would "brazenly lie under oath" at the drop of a hat. The same Maxwell who showed "a total failure to accept accountability" during her trial. The same Maxwell who's made perjury her personal art form.
But hey, she's suddenly remembered that Trump was a perfect gentleman during while he was BFF with Jeffrey Epstein during the Pedo Island era. What a relief!
Now Team Trump (featuring AG Pam Bondi, FBI Director Kash Patel, and chief of staff Susie Wiles) needs to figure out how to sell this story without everyone noticing that the FBI's been ordered to "flag" any Epstein documents mentioning their boss. Picture them all huddled at Vance's residence, nibbling on canapés while workshopping ways to transform a convicted sex trafficker's word into gospel. These masters of messaging, these sultans of spin, these architects of alternative facts, gathering for a crisis dinner party because apparently that's how this administration handles testimony from a notorious perjurer who's suddenly singing their favorite tune.
Hopefully they won't be serving credibility for dinner. Every guest would go into anaphylactic shock.
Previously:
• Child trafficker Maxwell scores cushy prison upgrade following mysterious interview with Trump official
• MAGA Mike closes the House of Representatives to protect Dear Leader from an Epstein vote
