Nothing says confidence in your boss's master plan like frantically stockpiling toilet paper in your Georgetown basement. As Rolling Stone reports, Trump administration officials are privately preparing for their own economic apocalypse while publicly insisting America is finally Great Again.
One official ran to Target to "bulk-buy toilet paper, some types of food, and other household supplies," while another is "stashing cash" at home, reports Rolling Stone.
When asked why they're hoarding supplies, one aide snipped: "Because it would be stupid not to!"
Former Trump advisor and Project 2025 contributor Stephen Moore helpfully explained that buying before prices skyrocket is "logical consumer behavior." Thanks for the hot tip, genius!
Meanwhile, Republican bootlickers are performing their usual loyalty act — nodding along with Trump's trade tantrum in public while privately hoping he'll declare victory and waddle away before the economy implodes completely.
Previously:
• Are you out of toilet paper? Blame these two.
• Toilet paper with a horror story from the author of 'Ring'
• New toilet paper dispenser delivers 3 squares if you watch a 30-second commercial
