Nancy Mace and Lauren Boebert are on bathroom patrol at the US Capitol.
I am the very model of a Genital Inspector General,
Enforcing laws both laughable and vaguely puritanical,
I scrutinize your bathroom trips in ways quite intersectional,
And legislate what's right and wrong with vigor quite exceptional.I make no room for nuance, just binary assumptions,
With policies designed to fuel the wildest misconceptions,
I've memos and decrees about the door you must be choosing,
Though logic says it's privacy that everyone is losing.Lauren Boebert's battles rage to check your chromosomes and such,
While Nancy Mace declares it's just the law—not overmuch,
And though their rhetoric pretends to have some moral clarity,
It's really just performance masked as legislative parity.I am the very model of a Genital Inspector General,
(Apologies, Gilbert and Sullivan)
My rulings are intrusive, and my logic is ephemeral!
Previously:
• Boebert fondled date's penis in theater
• Lauren Boebert offers insurrectionists a guided tour of the Capitol
• Delicate flower Nancy Mace cries assault after a handshake
• Nancy Mace says the adjudicated sexual abuser will be better for women's rights
• Nancy Mace demands respect for her racial harassment
• Nancy Mace melts down on House floor and tries to fight Jasmine Crockett: 'Want to take it outside!' (video)