Cute little gecko butt-dials random people a ‘bazillion’ times from Hawaii seal hospital

At a The Marine Mammal Center in Hawaii, a cute little gecko butt-dialed random people ‘a bazillion’ times before a human figured out what was going on. Read the rest

Beatboxing with a McDonald's cup, the impressive encore

In 2015, Parker Kane's performance of dubstep on a McDonald's cup went viral (video below). On Sunday, Kane returned to the same McDonald's in Rexburg, Idaho for the above encore.

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Get a load of this doofus boarding Air Force One with toilet paper stuck to his shoe

OK fine, maybe it's a napkin. Still, somebody could have told the man. But they didn't. They didn't. Video evidence below.

(Washington Post)

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Urban Dictionary attempts to incorporate Kavanaugh's definition of "Devil's Triangle"

A "Devil's Triangle" is a widely used term for an act of sexual congress between two men and a woman; but during his hearing, Brett Kavanaugh nonsensically insisted that this was some sort of drinking game. Read the rest

If Eminem were in Talking Heads, it would sound something like this

"Something about the pen and paper / I can look at all my ideas / And I can see them"

(Super Deluxe, thanks UPSO!) Read the rest

Who is the lazy one now, Susan?

Cat vs. Lazy Susan. What in the heck is this bamboozle. Read the rest

Listen: Buddy Hackett's filthy Donald Trump putdown joke, as told to Merv Griffin

One man was unafraid. An underestimated voice of wisdom, he tried to warn us all, decades before the 2016 elections. His name was Buddy Hackett. Read the rest

Hear these breakfast sausages cry for mercy as they are cooked

The horror... the horror.

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George Carlin's narration for Thomas the Tank Engine spiced up with other George Carlin voice-overs

You know what you're getting here going in: things that George Carlin voiced over the years, inappropriately added to his kid-friendly narration of Thomas and Friends. It's really great and fairly NSFW. When the aliens find whatever's left, I hope they judge us by this. Read the rest

The Institute of Gremlins 2 Studies, an interview with the founder

The Institute of Gremlins 2 Studies publishes "world-class commentary and analysis of the film Gremlins 2: The New Batch" on its Twitter account @G2Institute and, allegedly, a scholarly publication titled The Quarterly Journal of Gremlins 2 Studies. Joe Dante, director of Gremlins and Gremlins 2, seems to dig it. At The Quietus, Robert Barry interrogates the anonymous director of the institute:

What prompted you to start this account?

What prompted me to found the prestigious Institute of Gremlins 2 Studies? That’s obvious. If you look around at the world today, you will probably feel like someone trapped in an over-the-top parody of past events. Only one film fully captures this feeling. Just look at how other accounts have attempted to imitate us using other films. Inevitably they all fail. Nobody holds a candle to the great work our Institute is doing. The reason for their failure is simple – only Gremlins 2 can be exhaustively returned to, combed over, analyzed in this way. What “genius” people may see in the Institute is only a reflection of the genius of Gremlins

Why Gremlins 2?

There are many reasons why Gremlins 2 remains relevant, even twenty-eght years after the film’s release. One important reason is the way the film adapts the cartoonish ethos of Looney Tunes, which allows it to treat reality with a certain playfulness and plasticity. In recent years this has become popular again – surreal humor and elaborate descriptions of cartoon violence are mainstays of internet humor, perhaps reflecting a media and political environment that has become unmoored from reality.

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Watch Fred Armisen's jokes for musicians

Fred Armisen, a drummer, tells jokes that pretty much only a drummer would love and then ups the ante by going into guitarist humor. (Late Night with Conan O'Brien)

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Modern web design best practices

Casper Beyer's How to Design for the Modern Web is grimly amusing.

1. Let Users Know About Your Mobile Application

The very first thing you must do when a user visits your website is to show them a big modal dialog telling them that they should just install the mobile application instead.

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The New York Post's punny cover about Paul McCartney and John Lennon's circle jerk

That's some mighty fine headline writing from the New York Post for their rehash of Paul McCartney's GQ interview in which he reminisced about masturbating with John Lennon. Read the rest

Behold another botched restoration of a religious artifact

The delightful trend of incompetently "restored" art continues, though at this point one wonders if it's for the publicity. Maria Luisa Menendez of El Ranadoiro says the local priest gave her permission to restore a chapel's 15th century sculptures, so she really ran with it. Read the rest

God mad at Trump: photo proof!

Today, CNN photographer Khalil Abdallah captured this photo of God's anger at the White House. (via @matthoyeCNN)

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Hilarious mashup of Tom Clancy's "Jack Ryan" and "The Office"

I would watch this show. From Funny Or Die:

Up-and-coming CIA analyst and paper salesman Jim Ryan (John Krasinski) is thrust into a dangerous field assignment for the first time, launching him into the middle of a dangerous gambit with a new breed of terrorist, Dwight Schrute (Rainn Wilson). A mashup of Amazon's "Jack Ryan" and "The Office".

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Funny and clever anti-drunk driving sign

As a wise man once said, "It's funny cause it's true."

(r/funny) Read the rest

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