How to make prison pizza

Former prison inmate Josh of Lockdown 23and1 teaches the proper way to make prison pizza using only ingredients that an inmate might easily be able to acquire: saltines, Ritz crackers, ramen, tomato sauce, cheese, pepperoni, Slim Jims, and pickles.

(via Laughing Squid)

Read the rest

Man busted after purposely going to jail to sell drug-filled Kinder Surprise eggs smuggled in his butt

A gentleman in Ottawa, Canada -- eager to get sent to jail in order to sell weed he had packed inside of eight Kinder Surprise plastic egg "yolks" and stored in his rectum -- threw a rock at a police car in front of the courthouse. Wish granted. But once inside, his body got the best of him. From the Ottawa Citizen:

It’s not known if the guard noticed (Damian) O’Reilly was in some discomfort but whatever the reason, the guard had suspicions that O’Reilly might be smuggling drugs. The young inmate was escorted to dry cell No. 9. A dry cell has no plumbing and guards will either attempt to seize the contraband or wait for it to be expelled.

In this case, it was O’Reilly himself who, once alone in the dry cell, removed eight Kinder Surprise eggs from his rectum. A guard had to then collect the eggs and photograph them before securing them inside the Ottawa police drug safe at the jail.

In all, the eight eggs contained 59 grams of marijuana, a gram of MDMA, tobacco, rolling papers and matches.

Read the rest

Alabama inmates use peanut butter trick to escape prison

A dozen prisoners at Jasper, Alabama's Walker County Jail escaped on Sunday and one is still at large. One of them used peanut butter to change the number above his cell door and then called for the guard, a new employee, to open it. The number the prisoner changed it to was actually the door to the outside.

"And unknowingly to (the guard), he hit that lock and out the door they went," said Walker County Sheriff Jim Underwood.

Eleven of the escapees were nabbed within eight hours. A manhunt is underway for the twelfth. From CNN:

Meanwhile, as of right now, the Walker County sheriff said officials would look again at placing a young person in an control area to make decisions for 140 inmates. The camera system also needs to be equipped with more monitors, he added.

Despite the current sticky situation, the sheriff said he doesn't have plans to put any dietary restrictions in place in the future.

"They love peanut butter sandwiches," said Underwood.

Read the rest

President Obama issues 61 sentence commutations, only 10,000 more to go

Today, President Obama met with Americans who have received commutations on prison sentences during his presidency, and under previous administrations. Today, Obama commuted the sentences of 61 more people who were convicted of federal drug and firearm crimes. More than than a third of them were serving life in prison. Read the rest

Mentally ill man jailed over $5 worth of snacks dies in cell after waiting months for mental health care

Man, the first few paragraphs of this Washington Post story about a mentally ill man who died in a jail while waiting for medical care are so devastating. Read the rest