Johnny Harris took on the brain-melting task of truly understanding the argument that the earth is flat, including the modern conspiracy theory that the military guards ice walls circling earth's perimeter. Hoo boy. Read the rest
I really don't know what to say here. This is so demented, and so awful, I just can't even. Read the rest
Oh, yes this is real. Florida has officially declared WWE pro wrestling shows an 'essential business' that must be allowed to continue to operate during the deadly COVID-19 pandemic. Read the rest
A gentleman in Quebec has fun purposely coughing on a debit machine at a drive-thru restaurant window, and his passenger laughs at his witty behavior. It was posted on Facebook, which is how the video ended up in the hands of police, but has since been deleted. The police have yet to approach the fellow. Although the coronavirus brings out the best in most people, there are always a few morons amongst us.
Jeune homme qui tousse sur un terminal Interac avant de le remettre au commis: la police de Repentigny affirme avoir transféré ce dossier à la Sûreté du Québec. #Covid_19 pic.twitter.com/JYjEqv0Mlg
— Félix Séguin (@felixseguin) April 5, 2020
Via Vice Read the rest
A registered sex offender hosting a coronavirus party despite Maryland's ban on gatherings during the outbreak refused to shut down his 60-person drunken bonfire, cops say. The party host did not win the argument with police officers. Read the rest
A man from Worcester, Massachusetts was indicted by a federal grand jury Wednesday with allegedly smuggling salamanders and turtles into the United States. Read the rest
Chloe Haines, 26, received a £85,000 (US$105,000) bill from Jet2 airlines after she was charged with beating a crew member and trying to open the plane door while in flight. As a result of her alleged antics, the pilot made an emergency landing while being escorted by two RAF fighter jets. In addition to the bill, Jet2 banned Haines for life.
The Sun has photos of Haines looking unhappy at her court appearance.
Here we see a man who takes Genesis 9:1-5 seriously: "The fear of you and the dread of you shall be upon every beast of the earth." Read the rest
Number of days since the Trump administration has done something performatively homophobic or transphobic? Zero. Read the rest
Earlier this year in Painesville, Ohio, police arrested a gentleman after he took out his pet iguana, named Copper, swung her around by her tail, and hurled her at the manager of a Perkins restaurant. Arnold Teeter, 49, pleaded guilty to animal cruelty, resisting arrest, and disorderly conduct. A judge has just sentenced Teeter to 90 days in jail with 77 days suspended, five years of probation, and he must also pay restitution to the Lake Humane Society that cared for Copper who lost part of her tail. But that's not all:
The judge also entered a handful of other stipulations. Tetters is not allowed to publicize about what he did or why he did it. He’s not allowed to seek media attention about the case and he can’t brag about what happened.
"Judge tells man who threw iguana at fellow Painesville Perkins manager to stop bragging about it" (Cleveland.com) Read the rest
A 19-year-old Enterprise Rent-A-Car employee from Missouri decided to unwittingly dose his co-workers with LSD because they had "negative energy." The employees were hospitalized and the young man was arrested. He should have Timothy Leary's "Two Commandments for the Molecular Age" from his book The Politics of Ecstasy (1968):
Thou shalt not alter the consciousness of thy fellow man Thou shalt not prevent thy fellow man from altering his own consciousness.
Toronto police are asking the public to help them identify a woman who threw a chair from the balcony of a tall building, where it fell into traffic.
From CBC News:
Toronto police now say the incident took place around 10 a.m. ET on Saturday in the Harbour and York streets area — where there are dozens of condo towers — and that a mischief investigation was launched on Sunday morning.
Police also say in a news release that the suspect threw other items from the balcony that landed near the entrance to another condo building.
Sgt. Ron Boyce told Radio-Canada that police believe the condo is at 55 Bremner Blvd., and said management at the building is working with them.
After Trent Reznor dissed Ted Cruz at his Nine Inch Nails concert a few days ago, telling his audience that the "pain-in-the-ass" senator "was bugging to get on the guest list, and I told him to fuck off,” the delicate Texas senator went on the defensive.
"To all the gullible reporters who are “reporting” that I asked to be on the guest list at a Nine Inch Nails concert: uh, no, NIN is not my music taste. He was clearly joking. And for the record, I also didn’t “drink all his beer” the last time...but I would have! #FakeNews
To all the gullible reporters who are “reporting” that I asked to be on the guest list at a Nine Inch Nails concert: uh, no, NIN is not my music taste. He was clearly joking. And for the record, I also didn’t “drink all his beer” the last time...but I would have! #FakeNews https://t.co/ZNr292SCVl
— Ted Cruz (@tedcruz) November 29, 2018
When Spin wrote about Reznor's comments yesterday, they had tried to reach out to Cruz for comments, but he ignored them. If Cruz isn't going to take the opportunity to comment on a story about himself, he should stop whining about "fake news" and "gullible" reporters who are reporting with a video to back them up. If Cruz would think for himself rather than parrot Trump all the time, he'd realize that, whether or not what Reznor said was true, reporting on what the rock star said is not fake news. Read the rest
A man couldn't resist the urge to climb Len Lye's "Water Whirler" sculpture in Wellington, New Zealand earlier this month. To his surprise, the $1 million artwork snapped. In a final act of resistentialism, the sculpture fell on the man while he was in the water, and he was sent to the hospital.
From The New Zealand Herald:
Roger Horrocks, a trustee of The Len Lye Foundation and author of Len Lye's biography, said it was not the first time the iconic sculpture had been damaged.
The foundation had no uptake when it previously recommended Wellington City Council block access to the sculpture. He hoped it would now reconsider.
"A sculpture like that has to be proofed against idiots - total idiots who want to destroy it."
Image: YouTube screenshot Read the rest
It really is UNBELIEVABLE.
Someone get grandpa an Ensure, he's gonna need sustenance to make it through this shocker. Are you sitting down? Okay. Please read on, but only if you are feeling strong enough. Read the rest
Donald Trump Jr. wanted to brag about his father's approval rating, but the only way to brag about it would be to fudge the numbers, so that's exactly what he did. But not very well.
Junior wanted it to look like Trump's approval rating was better than Barack Obama's at this point in their presidencies, but since that wasn't possible, he took a screengrab of a cable news graphic that compared Trump to Obama, and then Photoshopped a 50% approval rating over Trump's real 40% approval rating so that it beat Obama's 45% approval rating. He did such a botched job that you can actually see 40% trying to hide behind the 50%.
He then put it on Instagram, writing, "“Amazing. I guess there is a magic wand to make things happen and @realdonaldtrump seems to have it. #maga #amreicafirst [sic]”
Yes, fake news is real. Junior kept the ridiculous post up for over 12 hours before it finally disappeared.
Via Think Progress
Top image: DonkeyHotey/Flickr Read the rest
The hilarious running commentary really adds to this idiot's attempt to rip off a store right before asking about working there. Read the rest
