Hilarious cockpit transcript of the Navy pilots who drew a giant penis in the sky over Washington

On November 16, 2017, the crew of a Navy EA-18G Growler jet delighted sixth graders, launched a meme, and pissed off prudes everywhere by drawing a penis in the sky with their engine exhaust over the state of Washington. Their prank caused quite a stir in the Navy, even leading to an "official information dispatch" to the Office of the Chief of Naval Operations. It's still unknown how much trouble the pilots got themselves into but the Navy Times has just received a copy of the full report thanks to a Freedom of Information Act request. The cockpit transcripts are fantastic. From the Navy Times:

“You should totally try to draw a penis,” the (pilot's cockpit partner, an electronic warfare office [EWO]) advised.

“I could definitely draw one, that would be easy,” the pilot boasted. “I could basically draw a figure eight and turn around and come back. I’m gonna go down, grab some speed and hopefully get out of the contrail layer so they’re not connected to each other....”

“Balls are going to be a little lopsided,” the pilot advised.

“Balls are complete,” he reported moments later. “I just gotta navigate a little bit over here for the shaft.”

“Which way is the shaft going?” the EWO asked.

“The shaft will go to the left,” the pilot answered.

“It’s gonna be a wide shaft,” the EWO noted.

“I don’t wanna make it just like 3 balls,” the pilot said.

“Let’s do it,” the EWO said. “Oh, the head of that penis is going to be thick.”

Read the rest

German model brilliantly pranks lewd and sexist Instagram commenters

German actress-model Palina Rojinski responded to the lewd and rude commenters on her Instagram by delivering a perfect prank. With help from German TV show Late Night Berlin, Rojinski turned the sexist creeps into the, er, butt of a joke. The image above that she posted brought out the usual male buffoonery but, as you can see below, all was not quite what it seemed.

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Danke Bernd, @damitdasklaas und @latenightberlin Wir hatten unseren Spaß! Ihr auch? Der ganze Prank #Busengate LINK IN BIO

A post shared by Palina Rojinski (@palinski) on Mar 26, 2019 at 12:06am PDT

(via PetaPixel) Read the rest

WATCH: Adult baby diaper Trump balloon flies over Donald's US-Mexico border visit

The “Baby Trump Balloon” was flown by activists to protest President Trump's proposed border wall, during the President's visit to the US-Mexico border to make the case for more racist policies against brown people. Read the rest

Excellent prank featuring a creepy porcelain doll

From Drayton Valley, Alberta, Canada comes this devilish prank. A woman noticed that her sister was selling a porcelain doll through Facebook's marketplace so she secretly bought it and sneaked it back into her sister's basement. She then lured her sister into the basement. "I thought that her reaction would be confusion," said the woman in the YouTube description, "but then she screamed and ran, scaring my daughter too. She did get really mad at me, but she does think it's funny now." Read the rest

Watch this voice actor's excellent prank on a scammer

Well played, IRLrosie! Read the rest

Students' phallic prank as seen from a satellite

Students at Mackie Academy secondary school in Aberdeenshire, Scotland created a piece of high art on the playing field. While the act occurred last year, its documentation -- which was actually the real prank -- apparently lives on in Google Earth.

“I’m sure there is lots of penises drawn in lots of places around the school and many other schools across the country, but this really is impressive," said one former student.

(The Scottish Sun)

Of course, they weren't the first students to play this particular, er, long game. For example: "Suspected high school prank goes unnoticed by APS for years" Read the rest

Watch: Viral jewelry thief prank has employees leaping over counters

Watch these poor jewelry shop clerks come close to a heart attack as they leap over counters chasing down customers who are running off with jewelry – except they aren't.

A viral prank in China, jewelry store "customers" try on expensive merch, then sprint towards the exit door. As the store employee chases after them, the prankster then casually stops in front of a display near the front door, as if that had always been their intention. Although not so nice, it's hard not to chuckle at how well the frantic employee transitions into an about face and casually walks away.

How did this prank start? According to Oddity Central:

The jewelry-stealing prank craze is believed to have been inspired by an Indonesian influencer’s shoplifting prank, which went viral in Asia last month. Harvinth Skin posted a video of himself trying out a pair of expensive sneakers at a sporting goods store and then pretending to run out wearing them, only to then sprint back, making it look like he was just trying them out. The shop assistant can be seen running after Skin, and then breathing a sigh of relief after realizing he never meant to make a run for it. Chinese pranksters just upped the stakes by essentially pulling off the same prank at jewelry stores.

You can see the Indonesian shoplifting prank at the end of this video. Read the rest

Jimmy Fallon and Michelle Obama surprise 30 Rock visitors with silly acts

Visitors to 30 Rockefeller Plaza, who thought they were on an NBC Studio Tour, got a big surprise when the elevator stopped on the wrong floor. Both Jimmy Fallon and Michelle Obama were waiting for the doors to open to play comedic bits on the unsuspecting tourists. Hot-cha! Read the rest

Watch this very funny glass door prank

Well played and certainly worth the effort:

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Rapper 50 Cent's expensive psy-ops prank on rival Ja Rule

Rapper 50 Cent says he bought 200 front seats to an upcoming Ja Rule concert just to keep them empty and psych out his longtime arch-enemy. Read the rest

Watch when Lyft passengers find out their driver is actually Chance the Rapper

There's nothing more fun than a prank that brings great laughter to its victims, and this is what Chance the Rapper does when he becomes an undercover Lyft driver for a day. He drives unsuspecting passengers around Chicago and chats with them about all sorts of things, including rappers. It takes a while, but these passengers finally realize who they're really talking to, and their reactions are priceless (especially the last woman, who comes after you think the video is over, so watch to the end).

Chance pulls this stunt to bring attention to his charity, The New Chance Fund, which raises funds for art and literature enrichment in the Chicago public schools. Read the rest

Cute little gecko butt-dials random people a ‘bazillion’ times from Hawaii seal hospital

At a The Marine Mammal Center in Hawaii, a cute little gecko butt-dialed random people ‘a bazillion’ times before a human figured out what was going on. Read the rest

Banksy booby-trapped a painting so it self-destructed after Sotheby's sold it for £953,829

Banksy's iconic "Girl With Red Balloon" street art went under the hammer at Sotheby's in a custom frame of the artist's own design; moments after it sold for £953,829, a booby-trap kicked in, drawing the canvas into a series of shredder blades built into the frame, rendering it down to a pile of forlorn strips of shredded cloth. Read the rest

Prank: Make a surprise mini golf course in your friend's bedroom

This is a prank of epic greatness.

“My roommate left town for a few days, so naturally i decided to put a mini golf course in her room,” says khicagokid -- “complete with a water hazard.” Read the rest

More Sacha Baron Cohen funnies: getting wingnuts to endorse "kinder-guardians" program to arm 3-year-olds

Sacha "Ali G/Borat" Baron Cohen has a new prank show called "Who Is America?" in the offing in which he punks political figures into endorsing bizarre, extreme political positions (think of it as a 21st century "Brass Eye"). Read the rest

Giant heroin spoon installed outside of OxyContin manufacturer's headquarters

On Friday, Stamford, Connecticut gallerist Fernando Luis Alvarez and artist Domenic Esposito kindly installed Esposito's large sculpture of a burnt spoon outside of Purdue Pharma, developers of the OxyContin. Police calmly arrested Alvarez and charged him with "obstruction of free passage" and "interfering with police." The current group show at Alvarez's gallery is about the opioid epidemic. He had previously agreed to take the fall for the art action. According to Esposito, the spoon sculpture, titled "Purdue," was inspired by his brother who struggles with drug addiction. From the Hartford Courant:

In 2007, Purdue pleaded guilty in federal court to mislabeling OxyContin and misleading the public about the risk of addiction, and had to pay $600 million. Three company executives were convicted of criminal charges. The firm has been and remains the target of numerous lawsuits, with legal actions against it increasing since the opioid epidemic reached a critical stage...

Robert Josephson, a spokesperson for Purdue, released a statement Friday morning.

“We share the protesters’ concern about the opioid crisis, and respect their right to peacefully express themselves. Purdue is committed to working collaboratively with those affected by this public health crisis on meaningful solutions to help stem the tide of opioid-related overdose deaths.”

photos: Brian O'Neil

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Brilliant billboard modification protesting ICE's treatment of migrant children

Last night, a group of culture jammers called Indecline improved a "1-800-GOT-JUNK?" billboard on a highway in Emeryville, California, just east of San Francisco. The billboard previously said "We make junk disappear" and they fixed it to read "We make kids disappear - ICE."

In a statement sent to the media, Indecline stated that the modification was a response to "President Trump's handling of the current immigration crisis, particularly, the separation of young children from their families."

Indecline also posted the following documentation of their work:

(SFGate) Read the rest

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