Mostly naked man plays Nokia ringtone on the accordion so that you don't have to

He's doing God's work. Which God that might be, however, is open for debate. Read the rest

The worst Halloween animatronic (NSFW, NSFL)

Did the scene in the new IT movie where Pennywise bites Georgie's arm, only for the camera to cut to an exterior shot of the drain, leave you frustrated and hankering for more? If you want to dwell on the boy's dismembered fate on an indefinite basis, this animatronic prop at the TransWorld Halloween & Attractions Show in St. Louis this week should be right up your sewer.

You might be fortunate enough to see this at your local haunted house this fall, the laughing and shaking and screaming as an endlessly looping moment.

I usually love the pop-culture grand guignol transgressive trash of modern Halloween horror, but I really hate this! A sense of amazed wonder subsiding to cold dismay. There's something very 2018 going on here. It doesn't have anything to do with our lives but we all know that terrible things will soon be happening and we've developed a very strange language to accomodate ourselves to the prospect of it.

Here's the top comment on the YouTube thread:

Funny Vine Videos | FVV 3 hours ago Can we feature your video in our YouTube channel ? Please make sure to email me at funnyvinevideos.fvv(at)gmail(dot)com I have a great offer for you $$$

Am I just getting old? Tell me if I'm just getting old. Read the rest

Terror in Paradise: 'I Got the Hawaii Missile Message and Prepared to Die'

“WTF!” My friend Jon Letman in Hawaii tells us about the terrifying false alarm he and his wife and son just received that their island, Kauai, was being bombed. Read the rest

Charlie Stross's CCC talk: the future of psychotic AIs can be read in today's sociopathic corporations

Charlie Stross's keynote at the 34th Chaos Communications Congress Leipzig is entitled "Dude, you broke the Future!" and it's an excellent, Strossian look at the future we're barelling towards, best understood by a critical examination of the past we've just gone through. Read the rest

Portland police stage bizarre sensory deprivation stunt against ICE protesters

Protesters against ICE's campaign of mass deportations were treated to a bizarre public stunt by Portland, OR police, who put them in isolation hoods and sound-muffling ear-protectors reminiscent of the treatment described by Gitmo prisoners and other survivors of US torture. The police were attempting separate the protesters from the bonds they used to stick themselves together and the measures were nominally taken to protect the protesters' hearing and vision from police power-tools. (Thanks, Fipi Lele!) Read the rest

Here's the weirdest, scariest stuff Trump said at 77-minute 'I’m not ranting and raving' meltdown

“Peace through strength,” Donald Trump said to reporters today in a rambling, aggressive, monologue news conference that lasted 77 minutes. Trump rattled on in circular patterns about plans to “build and rebuild” the “great” military and law enforcement. He dodged questions on Flynn, Obamacare, leaked reports of turmoil within the administration, and expressed outrage at being questioned repeatedly about “this whole Russia scam that you guys are building so that you don’t talk about the real subject which is illegal leaks.” Read the rest

Police lawyer threatens reporter: don't report smirking cop's corpse selfie

A St. Louis-area police officer was photographed posing with a murder victim's corpse, and a police lawyer threatened the newsroom to whom the image was leaked. KMOV, far from being impressed by the attempt to intimidate it, posted Lauren Trager's article wondering what on Earth a cops was doing giving the thumbs up while fooling around with Omar Rahman's dead body — and also Lynette M. Petruska's threatening letter.

“In your mind, is there any reasonable explanation for what that officer was doing?” asked Investigative Reporter Lauren Trager. “No,” said Staton. “Because when they come to a call, they're supposed to be there to help and protect, not doing what he was doing with thumbs up and a smirk on his face.”

Staton's attorney, Antonio Romanucci, agrees.

“It's hideous. The implications of this photograph are just astronomical,” said Romanucci.

He believes something isn't right.

“I have seen thousands and thousands of forensic photographs, I have never seen a staged photograph of an officer next to a deceased body,” Romanucci said.

The North County Policing Cooperative covers Vinita Park and Wellston, just outside of St. Louis city limits in Missouri. The legal letters are a good read; KMOV's counsel's reply may be compared to that given in the case of Arkell v. Pressdram. Read the rest

Utility knife reviewer loses his cool

The first few seconds of this video promises to be an insightful look at utility knives. It soon becomes clear that we will learn less about knives and more about the reviewer's prejudices, grudges, and anger control issues. Read the rest

America's War on Creepy Clowns leads to 12 arrests in various states

“They just kept coming, and coming, and coming, across multiple states. Clowns in vans. Clowns in the woods. Clowns lurking in the shadows. Clowns chasing people or doing crimes.” Read the rest

Seriously, try "view source" on google.com

This week's XKCD has a hell of an Easter Egg, and it's not even in the tooltip. Read the rest

Baseball fan in Canada arrested for spraying beer on a baby

Police in Toronto, Canada arrested a man at a baseball game for hitting a baby with the spray of a beer can he threw from his seat in the stands. Read the rest

WATCH: Insane excavator cliff descent probably not OSHA-approved

YouTuber YJSubs stabilized this crazy video of an excavator operator using the bucket to descend an unstable sandy embankment. Read the rest

TX schoolteacher "not a racist" because she only "almost" wants segregation [UPDATED]

A Texas teacher is under investigation after posting racist remarks on her Facebook page.

Baffling 1941 newspaper comic strip: "The Evening Argument"

On Facebook, cartoonist Michael Kupperman posted a collection of these baffling newspaper comics from 1941 called "The Evening Argument." He is at a loss to explain what is going on, as am I.

At first glance I thought these were a kind of "Goofus and Gallant" comic. So did several of the people commenting on Michael's post, including Anthony DeVito, who said, "Wait, I think I've got it: Aunt Het is supposed to be of strong moral fiber, while the women in Poor Pa are assholes. And then everyone argues all evening!"

James Urbaniak offers an appealing theory: "Separate strips published under a joint title because of their parallel styles and lack of humor," while Will Keen insists they are "discreet sex adverts."

We may never know the truth. Even so, I share cartoonist Mark Newgarden's sentiment: "My new favorite thing in the world." I would happily buy a book filled with these comics. Read the rest

Why letting a pregnant woman's heart stop could save both her and her baby

I've been describing this Slate piece as the most awesome thing I really should not have read at 38 weeks pregnant. For decades, doctors thought that a pregnant woman whose heart stopped had pretty much no chance of survival. After trying to resuscitate her, attention would shift to rescuing the baby. But recent research suggests a better solution: Spend less time trying to get the mother's heart pumping again. Not only does it give the infants a better shot at survival, it also, insanely enough, saves more mothers. Turns out, once somebody removes the other human from your body, your failed heart will often just start pumping again on its own. Read the rest

"Aggressive bush" defeats mailmen

Mark Malloy, for London newspaper Metro: "A Shropshire man has been told by the Royal Mail he will not receive any post unless he cuts back his aggressive raspberry bush." Read the rest

Terrifying celebrity video faceswaps

Come for Tom Hanks + Zooey Deschanel, stay for Mike Tyson + Michelle Obama, then run in terror from Sarah Palin + Honey Boo. The animated GIF has reached its apogee in Hybrid Celebrities, a collection of nightmarish video faceswaps at the distinctly NSFW DailyPicDump.com. [Thanks, Papa Fapa!] UPDATE: They're taken from this sketch. [Team Coco] Read the rest

More posts