A simple but effective tip for a better burger, from Boing Boing buddy Gareth Brawnyn's excellent "Tips, Tools, and Shop Tales" e-newsletter:

Here’s a life-thing that you need to know about, especially before this weekend’s cookouts. How often do you get a restaurant burger, or grill one yourself, and before you’re finished horking it down, the soggy bun has lost the will to live and has disintegrated in your hands? Here’s the fix for your fixins. Don’t place the meat directly on the bun or the condiments on top of the lettuce. Place lettuce between the meat and the bun and between the condiments and the bun. No more soggy burger.

LISTEN CLOSELY: "I thought it was a joke," says Clemson athlete upon learning the White House was serving him Wendy's.pic.twitter.com/bRNRhLmDBF

— Ʀogue US Mint (@RogueUSMint) January 15, 2019

You can clearly hear one attendee state that they thought this was a joke.

I believe I hear the declaration "It's absurd" over and over, however that may be a southern accent repeatedly hailing "Thank you, sir!"

Folks are clearly grateful Orange Julius provided this fast food bonanza. Read the rest

Using antibiotics to keep livestock healthy until they're chopped up and smooshed into burgers and chicken nuggets is not a great idea: we're already facing a bevy of antibiotic-resistant bugs hellbent on killing us. Throwing the drugs down our throat, in meat or pill-form, is only going to make things worse. Doctors are coming to understand this and, in many cases, are prescribing antibiotics as a last resort. The folks that produce meat for burger joint supply chains? Not so much. By pumping their livestock full of antibiotics, whether the animals are sick or not, is a great way to ensure that the the animals stay healthy until they're sent to the slaughter. Despite the dangers posed by overuse of these wonder drugs, a lot of burger joints are fine with this:

From CNN:

Twenty-five of the top US burger chains were graded on their antibiotic policies in a collaborative report released Wednesday. Only two chains received As, Shake Shack and BurgerFi; the other 23 got a D minus or F.

Wendy's was given a D minus for a policy that the authors described as "while far from comprehensive ... a positive step forward." According to the company's website, Wendy's will get about 15% of its beef from producers that have committed to a 20% reduction in antibiotics used in their livestock and whose cattle's antibiotic use can be tracked and reduced.

For their efforts, as weaksauce as they are, Wendy's scored the only D issued by the study. McDonald's, Burger King, Sonic, Hardee's, Whataburger, Carls Jr., Culver's, Steak n' Shake, In n' Out, White Castle, Smashburger, Checkers, Krystal, Freddy's, Habit, Rally's, Fuddruckers, A&W (in the U.S., anyway) Jack's and FarmerBoys all earned an F rating. Read the rest

In-N-Out, the popular California burger chain, just dropped $25,000 on the California GOP under Donald Trump. Read the rest

Last month, while I was in Boston on assignment, my EIC took me out for lunch. Impossible Foods’ Impossible Burger was on the menu at the joint we went to. I had my doubts, as I ordered the thing, but it seemed like a rare opportunity to try the hard-to-find lab-grown burger that I shouldn’t pass up. It was absolutely delicious. Thanks to the FDA’s declaration that all of the ingredients in the Impossible patty are safe to consume, for most everyone, we might start seeing the plant-based meat in the wild a whole lot more often.

It’s not that there was anything poisonous or specifically dangerous in an Impossible Burger patty. Rather, to make their ‘meat,’ Impossible Foods used a part of the soybean plant that no one’s every really thought to eat before: the root.

From Engadget:

Impossible Foods submitted the meat substitute for review back in 2014, but the FDA responded with concerns that its key ingredient, a protein known as soy leghemoglobin, might cause allergies and other adverse effects. The protein is commonly found in soy plants' roots, but since we don't typically eat that part of the plant, the FDA had reservations about its safety. In response, the company sent in more info, including results from a rat-feeding study, which convinced the agency to declare that the plant-based meat (and soy leghemoglobin) is "generally recognized as safe" for human consumption.

This is great news as it’s soy leghemoglobin that makes an Impossible Burger what it is. Read the rest

Tim McCormick, a cop in Fort Myers, publicly accused a local Burger King of serving him dirt on a burger. But after an investigation, the "dirt" was found to be the burger seasoning.

Fitzpatrick said that after the officers watched the video they determined that nothing inappropriate had happened to the food cooked for McCormick.

So what was it?

As part of the prep process for cooking the meat, Fitzpatrick said, there is a salt and pepper blend applied to the food. He said it is possible that the spice mixture, as well as the flame-broiled grilling process itself, may have left particles the officer thought was dirt.

Also:

McCormick, posting under the Facebook name of Mac O'Durham, added that he noticed that his receipt had block letters with the word POLICE on it, something he said he had never noticed in previous visits.

But the restaurant has more receipts:

"Every one of our guests we ask 'May we have your name to better serve you?'," he said.

In this instance when the server asked McCormick for his name he simply said "officer." When the clerk didn't understand and asked him to repeat his name, McCormick said "police officer."

Christ, what an asshole. Read the rest

IHOP caused quite a stir last week by claiming they are changing the restaurant chain's name to IHOb. They aren't. It's (duh) a marketing stunt and the "b" stands for "burgers." From the New York Times:

Many people said they were distressed, some because they hate the sound of the new word, others because they love pancakes. (Pancakes remain on the restaurant’s menu.) Still others pointed out that the “changed” logo, with its lowercase b, resembled that of o.b. tampons....

Brad Haley, IHOP’s chief marketing officer, said that the idea had been proposed by the marketing firm Droga5 in November. He said that only one IHOP location, on Sunset Boulevard, had undergone a design change in response to the new (fake) name, which is meant to promote a product line of Ultimate Steakburgers.

Read the rest

When I was in elementary school, one of my classmates liked yanking the legs off Daddy longlegs spiders and popping the body into his mouth. He would likely enjoy the tarantula-topped cheesburger available on a limited basis at Durham, North Carolina's Bull City Burger and Brewery. Apparently the arachnid adds a pleasant crunch to the burger. Proprietor Seth Gross (yes, that's his last name), says his restaurants exotic meat offerings have "always been about diversity and teaching people about different types of cuisines and maybe other diets around the world." From Fox13:

Normally in the U.S. people keep spiders as a pets, but overseas, they are hunted and eaten. The creatures can be found in the forests of Cambodia and adult males can grow up to six inches - or the size of a human hand.

"There's something thrilling about eating your fear. So a lot of folks who are afraid of spiders, this is like the big one," Gross said.

(via Weird Universe) Read the rest

In 2009, Arby's commissioned Phil Hansen to paint the Mona Lisa using grease from its fast food competitors. The piece is called "Mona Greasa."

(via Weird Universe)

Read the rest

Gotta make 25 burgers for a whole bunch of tykes? Increase the speed and control the consistency of your burgers doneness with a grill press!

This cast iron beauty will apply heat directly to the top of your burger, speeding its cooking and making it cook more evenly. Simply heat the press up on your grill before you start cooking, and put it on top of the meat, or veg, that you want to see finish up fast.

I also use a press for making bacon completely flat, when I go full-on compulsive about my bacon.

Update International New 8" Barbecue BBQ Grill Steak Weights via Amazon Read the rest

Miso Robotics' Flippy is a "kitchen assistant" robot that can grill, flip, prep, fry, and plate food.

“We focus on using AI and automation to solve the high pain points in restaurants and food prep," says Flippy CEO David Zito. "That’s the dull, dirty and dangerous work around the grill, the fryer, and other prep work like chopping onions. The idea is to help restaurants improve food quality and safety without requiring a major kitchen redesign.”

And what of those millions of people who flip burgers to make ends meet?

“Tasting food and creating recipes will always be the purview of a chef," says Flippy CEO David Zito. "And restaurants are gathering places where we go to interact with each other. Humans will always play a very critical role in the hospitality side of the business given the social aspects of food. We just don’t know what the new roles will be yet in the industry.”

(TechCrunch via Laughing Squid)

Read the rest

Illustrator Noah Stacey (Zen-Master on DeviantArt) created this fantastic burger alignment chart after nearly writing off his inspiration: Read the rest

In-N-Out Burger is ditching the antibiotic treated beef. While ordering a double-double animal style with chopped peppers will still be powerful tasty, it'll no longer induce rage or allow you to challenge Barry Bonds home run record. Read the rest

When the beloved West Coast burger chain In-N-Out opened a new store in Oregon recently, loyal fans showed up at 7 a.m. to get in line. Read the rest

Remember when Burger King introduced its black gothburger in Japan last year? Coming soon is the Aka ("red") Chicken or Samurai Beef Burger with red cheese and red bun colored with tomato powder, and red hot sauce. Read the rest

Burger King has launched a black burger in Japan made from black peppered-beef, buns and cheese darkened with bamboo charcoal, and a topping of garlic sauce blackened with squid ink. Read the rest